From: Jose L. Solano <jsolano199@aol.comlink> Subject: [PW!] Sweet Dreams, Tenchi Inverse Date: Thursday, February 24, 2000 5:15 PM "<Where is he?!>" yelled Ashura as soon as he exited the shorted PC. Aside from Ashura and his small group of Pokémon once owned by Trent and currently owned by Tenchi, several other stored Pokémon also ran free. Nurse Joy panicked and immediately picked up the phone to call Officer Jenny. As she was about to dial nine, Ashura smashed the telephone with his sharp talons. "<You're not calling anyone! I'm not letting myself be imprisoned again!>" Before Jenny could recover, Ashura disappeared out the door, followed by several of the other escaped Pokémon. "<Where is he...>" Ashura sniffed the ground, hoping to find a trace of Tenchi or Natasha. "<This way!>" He ran towards the direction of a small house in Viridian City, still followed by a few Pokémon. By the time he reached the house, only Magmar, the Abra that had helped him, and a Nidorino remained. "<Alright, let's get one thing straight, I'm the leader and you follow my orders!>" "<I ain't followin you. I'm goin ta get me some burgers...>" said the Nidorino. "<You're not going anywhere! Do as I say or I'll fuckin chop your head off!>" Ashura waved one of his talons in Nidorino's face. "<Eh... whatever ya say boss...>" "<Alright, Magmar, you guard the front door, Nidorino, you take the back, and Abra, make sure no other humans arrive.>" Each member of the small and unorganized team went off to do their job while Ashura burrowed under the house's foundation. He surfaced inside Tenchi's bedroom. "Drakkun? What are you doing here?" Tenchi said. Natasha was nowhere to be found. "<My name's not Drakkun you fuckin idiot!>" "What?" Apparently, Tenchi couldn't understand the Sandslash language. Ashura had hoped it wouldn't come to this. "Haf it your way," Ashura with a deep but inidentifiable accent. "I weel ressot to sspeaking your langwaj." Tenchi jumped slightly, startled. "Thatss rite, Tenshi, I can tock English." "Don't you mean 'speak' English, Drakkun?" "I am not Dakkun. My nehm is Ashuwa!" "What do you want, Ashuwa?" "It iss not Ashuwa, it iss Ashuwa!" Tenchi gave him a puzzled look. Frustrated, Sandslash used his claws to engrave his name on the wall. "Oh, I see, Ashura. You need to work on your r's." "I dohn cawe about your language. I am heeya for revenge." "I didn't do anything to hurt you, Dra....Ashura. Why do you want revenge?" "You killed my mahsteh, Tenshi, and you sstole me." Ashura's ingrammatical sentences weren't phrased very well, but they got the point across, nonetheless. "I didn't kill your master, Dreadite did. I only took you to save you from the fire." "You lie, Tenshi!" Ashura jumped on the bed and held his right arm back. "It iss your fohlt that he is dehd! If you had not paid him to potect you at your wedding, he wood sstill be alive today!" "There was nothing I could do, Ashura! I didn't expect it to turn out that bad!" Tenchi held a pillow up, prepared in case Ashura suddenly pounced. "It's not like your master did a good job anyway." "Awe you ssaying my mahsteh'ss work wass bad?!" "Yes, I am! Your master's failure nearly got Natasha and I killed!" "You have inssulted my mahsteh, Tenshi. For that, you musst die." "What? No, we can talk this over, Ashura!" "No, we can't. Sssweet dreamss, Tenshi Inverssse!" -------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------- "Tenchi Inverse, groom at the recent disastrous wedding in Celadon, was pronounced dead today after being found dead with twenty seven stab wounds to the chest in his Viridian City home. The alleged assailant, according to an Abra and a Magmar also found at the scene, was Ashura, the pet Sandslash once owned by the notrious Trent Retwin, who was killed in the aforementioned Celadon wedding. Police believe these two events may be connected. Tenchi's widow Natasha Inverse would not comment on the situation." As soon as the report ended, Aurem turned the TV off. She got of her chair and walked over to her sleeping master, Akumachu. "Master, wake up." "What is it, master?" Akumachu asked, yawning. "It seems that Trent Retwin's Sandslash is doing your bidding for him." "What, did he blow up the Sears Tower?" "Well... no, but he did manage to kill a person." "Is that all?! Wake me when something IMPORTANT happens." Akumachu turned over and resumed his slumber. You want to know the funny part of this? Otaku, look closely at this ending. YOU'RE ON CANDID CAMERA!! No, but seriously, this is an NC-post. But this serves as a reminder- Hurry up and do something about Ashura! I'm tired of being stuck here! " Jose Luis Solano ------------------------------- Offical Member of the AFSH Stupid Brigade ------------------------------- Beware the Dark Hamster of the Sith