Subject: [PW!] The Never-Ending Tournament
Date: Thursday, February 03, 2000 9:00 PM
"Isn't this Pokemon League Tournament ever going to end?!" Marvin
laments as he stares at the television screen. He has been sitting
inside his green bean bag chair so long that almost his entire body has
sunk into the chair. The multi-colored caravan has been parked outside
the Viridian City Pokemon Center for days now, "I mean, since when has
this been going on?" He looks down towards his usual source of all
information. Even though Marvin's question wasn't addressed towards any
particular member of the Caravan Crew, Xerox instinctively faces Marvin
to offer an answer of some kind.
"I would not know, master. I did not even know about the competition
until you informed me of it in Celadon City." Xerox the purple Ditto
declares without further elaboration, then turns to face Silly Putty,
the green Ditto who has been begging to go out with her for three days
already. Xerox wobbles around in a negative response, "I already told
you repeatedly, Silly Putty, I do not have the time nor the desire to be
in a relationship. To be honest, even if I did, you would not be my
Silly Putty looks sad for a moment, but shakes the emotion off like he's
frequently had to in the past, "Who would?"
"There is another Ditto that has touched me in a way that I have never
quite experienced." Small red lines appear on Xerox's purple face under
her black dot eyes when she says this, "I thought Pokeballs were the
most euphoric experience, then I met..." Xerox stops when she sees that
Silly Putty's face looks very disappointed, "Nevermind. Do not preoccupy
yourself with who is my first choice. All you need to know is that you
are my second choice, since you are the only alternative... That is to
say you would be my second choice *if* I desired a romantic
relationship, which I do not. You can still stay here in the caravan,
though, on the conditions that you do not bother my master and stay away
from my sister. I will personally..."
"SHHH, Xerox!" Marvin's command silences his Pokemon and the remote
control in his hand raises the volume of the one small television in the
caravan, "The Kyle Richter versus Sarah Jane match sure is picking up!
Bozo the Mr. Mime runs over next to Marvin and sits down on an imaginary
chair next to Marvin's real one. Bozo places an imaginary bag of popcorn
on his lap and tosses imaginary popcorn into his mouth! After finishing
his nonexistant snack, the Mr. Mime yawns silently while stretching,
then rests his arm on Marvin's back. While Marvin smiles at the show of
affection on the usually surly Pokemon's behalf, Bozo reaches into
Marvin's coat pocket and pulls out the magician's wallet.
Xerox heads towards her corner of the caravan, saying, "I do not enjoy
watching or participating in Pokemon battles. I do not find controlled
violence as a sport entertaining - whether it be Boxing, Wrestling, or
Pokemon battles. There is a multitude of entertaining activities that I
can occupy myself with that don't involve attacking a fellow Pokemon.
Count me out of watching that Tournament." When Xerox arrives in her
corner, she reaches for a newspaper and reads the front page, "Newcomer
Damian Fox versus Elite Trainer Sirius? That is the most important news?
How I wish this Tournament would end."
"So do I!" Marvin exclaims, "I'm waiting here to cheer up the losers
when they leave Indigo Plateau and come to Viridian City. Hey, and with
the winners probably coming here too, it'll be the biggest magic show
ever! Now hush, I want to see this!"
Silly Putty decides that it would be rude to interrupt Xerox's newspaper
reading, so he sits down in front of the television.
> "I'll be amazed if Alakazam can Recover from that one," the
> commentator remarked. Sarah Jane smiled uneasily. Sigfreid did not
> actually know Recover.
> Sigfreid carefully righted himself. "Kaaa...zam!!!" he cried
> as he painfully straightened his spine out once again.
> "Sigfreid, don't go for power, go for speed!" Sarah Jane
> ordered. "You'll wear him down! Use Mega Punch!"
"Sigfreid, eh?" Marvin squints at the screen, "Where's Roy and the
Silly Putty glares at Marvin, "Hey! Everyone knows Arcanine is a dog,
not a tiger!"
"Who said it wasn't?" Marvin scratches his head, tilting his top hat to
the side, "Hmm, this Sigfreid might be a Pokemon named after the
magician ... But it could be that the magician turned yellow, grew a
moustache, and branched out on his own. Who could blame him for doing
that? I definitely wouldn't have a magician partner... especially not a
male magician partner. That would look a little... uhm..." Bozo raises
his left hand and wiggles it around in the air while making a doubtful
face as if to insinuate something. Marvin nods, "Exactly." He turns back
to the television to watch more of the match.
> "Eh, I'll get to it," Leviathan grunted. "I want to see if this
> really Houdini's best trick." The Dragonite hardly flinched as Mega
> Punch after Mega Punch was landed on his face. After forty-five
> seconds or so, the barrage of fist attacks ceased as Sigfreid became
> too exhausted to continue.
Silly Putty's eyes grow a little wider with surprise, "Wow! How many PP
UPs has that Alakazam eaten?!"
"HEY!" Marvin angrily shouts at Silly Putty, "Stop being such a pervert
or else I'll have to throw you out of my caravan!"
"What? Why?!" Silly Putty wonders why he is being accused of being a
pervert during one of the few times when he isn't trying to be one, "I'm
just saying that Alakazam must've eaten a lot of PP UPs, that's all.
Besides, if you're throwing people out of the caravan for being
perverts, then I suggest you kick yourself out. Don't think I haven't
noticed the way that you look at..."
"Quiet, you. I'm trying to watch the Tournament!" Marvin sweatdrops and
looks at the television again.
> "Spoonman...?" It dawned on Sarah Jane what Leviathan was about
> to do. "Sigfreid, drop your spoons now!" But her voice was drowned
> out as the Dragonite let out a triumphant roar and then proceeded to
> toss Thunderbolts in all directions. Sigfreid thought his
> teleportation abilities would save him yet again...but this time such
> was not the case. The Alakazam's spoons sucked up the electricity
> tiny lightning rods and arced a crippling current into the psychic
> "Stick a fork in this loser; he's done!" Leviathan said of the
> now-charred Alakazam.
"In this case, wouldn't a spoon be more appropriate than a fork?" Marvin
comments with a smirk on his face.
Silly Putty shakes his head, "No way! You can't stick a fork in
something unless it's really soft like pudding. I think the best type of
silverware to stick in the loser is a spork... or maybe a foo..." Before
Silly Putty can say the word, Bozo the Mr. Mime grabs the green Ditto
and Doubleslaps him silly for even thinking about resurfacing that
annoying trendy word that gets on his nerves.
"Meanie!" The high pitched yell comes from somewhere in the caravan. A
blonde blue-eyed girl wearing a golden tiara, a white shirt with a red
bow on it, a short blue skirt, and red boots hops out of the clothing
racks, "Bozo, fer all yer meanieness with me ans my sis ans Marvy-man
ans now Silli, I totally punishes ya in the names of the Moon! Fersure!"
She takes off her tiara and hurls it at Bozo! It doesn't reach him. The
ordinary tiara drops in front of the Mr. Mime's curly shoes.
Bozo looks down at the tiara, then looks up with a sarcastic expression
on his face. He starts to run over to Sailor Famifax to teach her a
lesson for even thinking about hitting him with a cheesy prop. He raises
a clenched fist as he runs.
"Eeeep! I tried my best, Silli! I'm sowee I couldn't do more!" Famifax
leaps back into the clothing racks to find protection from the crazed
clown chasing after her with an imaginary weapon - possibly a meat
cleaver. After Famifax hides, Bozo shrugs, tosses his unreal weapon
aside, and goes back to watch more television with Marvin. Both Silly
Putty and Marvin glare at Bozo. The Mr. Mime puts an innocent look on
his face and twiddles his giant thumbs while silently whistling.
> "But Snowflake *does* need to move if she doesn't want to get her
> blubbery ass beat down," Leviathan pointed out, as Snowflake
> charged up again. The second Snowflake was about to fire off the
> Leviathan backhanded the immobilized Dewgong across the face and
> knocked the beam off course. "Yawn...you're not even worth the waste
> of a Thunderbolt," the Dragonite snorted as he lifted the frozen
> Dewgong into the air. "The second you're not such a loser, call me
> I'll really throw down on your fat butt. But for now..." Leviathan
> tossed Snowflake clear over the arena boundary. "Buh-bye."
> "Snowflake is disqualified!" the referee boomed. Another red
> light went out on the scoreboard.
"Ha! That Dragonite sure is funny! I can't wait to meet him myself after
the Tournament." Marvin rubs his hands together with a smile, "One more
loss, one more step closer to the Viridian City Magic Show... Oh man, I
can barely contain myself!"