From: RobfromVoid (RobfromVoid@prodigy.net) Subject: [PW!] A Turbulent Start! Newsgroups: alt.games.nintendo.pokemon Date: 2000/04/15 "The Magical Marvel is ready to set sail!" Marvin the magician exclaims to the purple Ditto sitting in his crossed arms, a smile on his face, "It was so nice of that Professor Oak fellow to help me come up with the name. It's too bad that he was all out of Water Pokemon that could help me sail one out of seven seas. Now I'll just have to follow his advice and find that Island of the Turtle Pokemon as I sail southward towards the Orange Islands. Okay, I'm ready to put the Marv in the Magical Marvel!" The middle-aged man in a blue tuxedo steps onto the plank leading from Pallet Port onto his multi-colored ship. Xerox sighs and says, "I am not so sure I like that name, master. I personally think that we should have named the ship after a historical hero or perhaps a literary figure. Professor Oak may know about Pokemon a great deal, but he is not the best at using literary devices such as alliteration. Have you ever read his poetry? I know I wish I had not. Why did he even publish it?" "Ah, don't worry Xerox, it's not like the name's etched in stone..." Marvin proceeds to step into his cabin, the door of which has a stone plaque on it that reads 'The Magical Marvel'. Once Marvin is in the interior of his cabin, a replica of the interior of the caravan that the magician used to ride around in, he points at the Mr. Mime in the corner. The Mr. Mime is wearing a captain's hat and he is spinning an imaginary steering wheel. Marvin says, "Alright, captain Bozo! We're ready to sail! Just head south until you see an island that's shaped like a giant turtle. I need to stop there to catch a Water Pokemon!" Bozo salutes Marvin with one large gloved hand and marches out of the cabin, happy to have a dignified job for once. Marvin sinks down into his green bean bag chair to relax as Bozo figures out how to navigate the ship. Xerox slides out of his arms, grabs a large novel, and sits down near Marvin to read it. Just as Xerox starts to read the first paragraph in her new non-fictional book about Ash Ketchum's adventures in the Orange Islands, Marvin interrupts her by thinking out loud. Marvin exclaims, "Ahhh, a sailor's life is the life for me. I haven't even left port and I'm already experiencing the serene tranquility that everyone always talks about when they go on those cruises! Well, at least the ones that don't sink... which are... rare..." Marvin frowns after pondering the rarity of ships that don't sink, "Gulp. Xerox, our ship won't sink, right?" Xerox wishes she could comfort her master, but her dedication to honesty is too strong. She pauses for a moment to consider the best way to put what she is about to say, then says, "I think it depends on the competence of the ship's helmsman." Marvin wishes he had watched more Donald Psyduck cartoons when he was a little kid as he asks, "What's a helmsman?" "You do not want to know." Xerox states seconds before the ship experiences some severe turbulence which knocks Marvin out of his bean bag chair and sends him stumbling towards the back of the cabin, where the clothing racks are located. Xerox is also knocked out of her place, despite her natural limited suction that comes from being a Ditto, and she also soars back into the clothing racks with her eyes closed. When she opens them, she is standing next to Marvin, wearing a top hat. Marvin's hat has been knocked off, and his thinning hair is uncombed, revealing bald spots on his scalp, "Where am I? Did the ship sink? Am I in Davy Jones' Locker?" He feels around with his eyes closed, afraid to open them, "Oh my goodness! I can't feel my legs! I can't feel my... hey, wait a minute. These aren't my legs. I was wearing pants, not a grass skirt." Marvin opens his eyes to see that the legs before him are long, feminine, and they end at blue rollerskates, "Wait a minute... That can only mean one thing. My legs have somehow been exchanged with Famifax's! I must be a really good magician to do that by accident!" "Ya no exchange nothin! Ya on topah me, Marvy-man! Ya squishy me so totally much! Fersure!" The voice of Famifax is heard protesting moments before the legs that Marvin are starting at melt into pink goo, leaving two empty rollerskates on the floor. The pink goo becomes concentrated and shapes into Famifax, the pink Ditto, right before Marvin's eyes. The Ditto who likes to pretend to be teenage girls frowns at Marvin, "Ya big dummy! Now I gotsta dress pwetty allover again!" Marvin glances around him. In addition to the empty rollerskates, there is an abandoned grass skirt, a hawaiian shirt half buttoned up, a red lei, and other tropical accessories that Famifax intended to wear for the trip to the Orange Islands before Marvin crushed her under his weight, forcing her to revert back to Ditto form so as to not suffocate. Before Marvin can apologize for what he's done, the ship experiences another sudden jerk, which sends Marvin, Famifax, and Xerox flying out of the clothing racks, stumbling across the cabin, and crashing into Marvin's magical props, the doors of which were knocked open during the previous turbulence. Marvin, now trapped in a Zig Zag Lady box, pokes his head through the hole provided for the usual female assistant, "What in the world is going on? Why are we getting thrown around like this?!" Xerox climbs out of a pile of fake human body parts, tossing aside a fake foot with her pseudopod, "Like I said, master, the likelihood of this ship sinking depends on the helmsman. Which means that if Bozo doesn't learn how to navigate this vessel rather quickly, we are doomed." Xerox looks up at the Zig Zag Lady box, and smirks when she sees Marvin's face matched up with the voluptuous female body painted on the now closed door of the tall box. "Well, I'm sorry, Xerox, but I don't find doom as funny as you do..." Marvin pokes his hand out of the slot provided on the box and waves it in such a way that the box's door snaps open. Marvin falls out and stands up, combing his hair to the side in an attempt to cover up his bald spots, "...which is why I'm going to go outside and fire Bozo right this instant!" He walks over to Xerox and snatches his top hat from her head and places it on his own, "I'm not going to even give him pension!" Xerox grabs on to Marvin's leg with her pseudopods, "Do not fire him, master! Bozo has quite a temper, and if you deny him the only job that he has ever been eager to carry out, he is likely to intentionally sink this yacht. He just needs to practice for a while and soon I'm sure he will be an excellent captain before we know it. In the event that the ship sinks, I will find the nearest Water Pokemon and Transform into him or her. That way, I can save you and Bozo." "Whas about me?!" Famifax squeezes out of the hole on Marvin's Guillotine seconds before the blade falls from above. The pink Ditto crosses her pseudopods and pouts at Xerox as best she can with a Ditto's mouth, "Ya no saves me, sis?!" Xerox's tone and eyes express sarcasm as she says, "You are a Ditto. You can also Transform into a Water Pokemon." "Yah, I knows, buts I dunno how ta swims!" Famifax rolls her small eyes, "You juss gets stupider and crayzeer evewy day, sis!" Marvin crouches down and places one hand on each Ditto sister, "Don't fight, you two! We're going to have to work as a team if Bozo sinks this ship. I just hope he doesn't. I wish we hadn't spent all this time talking about it. Now it will definitely sink!" "How do you figure?" Xerox asks, curious to know the reasoning backing Marvin's assumption. Marvin sighs as he explains, "It's called foreshadowing. Ever since we left port we've been talking about the ship sinking, so now it's definitely going to happen. Unless, of course, the irony of the ship not sinking is more powerful than foreshadowing!" Xerox narrows her tiny black eyes, "Do you actually believe that our lives are affected by literary devices, master?" "I don't know... I guess we'll just have to wait until the next episode to find out!" Marvin exclaims, staring off into the distance, "Now I just have to ask a three-letter question to end this segment: TBC?" Marvin raises an eyebrow as he stares at the wall. Xerox stares at Marvin in sarcastic disbelief, "I knew that you were a little eccentric, master, but now you sound utterly insane. Nothing will end just because you say three letters in an inquisitive tone. That notion is simply propos..." -Marvin