From: Bandraptor (bandraptor@aol.com) Subject: [PW!] Thundercats, Denji-ho! Newsgroups: alt.games.nintendo.pokemon Date: 2000/03/03 >Finally the odd group of travellers arrived at the entrance to surges gym... <Ah, at last we approach the sacred gates of Asgard, wherein lies the giant Thor, guardian of the mighty Mjolnir. Only when I have that, and then alone, shall the power to weild Thunderbolt be mine!> Blizzard crooned, not noticing that the others had entered the gym without her. <Emphasis on 'mine'!> The Persian scrambled to beat them inside. Lieutenant Surge was sitting in his office, face buried in a book, "Japanese for Lazy People". His Raichu was sitting across from him, relaxing on a beanbag chair. It was lazily paging through a glossy magazine, skimming through the features, mulling over the editorials, thinking how nice it would be if it knew how to read. THUMP. THUMP. THUMP. THUMP. THUMP. The Raichu perked its ears. It sounded as though five people had just come barreling into the gym, made a beeline for the office, and crashed into the door, having not realized that it was locked. The mouse shrugged, rolled out of its chair, scampered towards the door, and opened it inward. Blizzard, Darwin, Keri, Orion, and Samuraichu all fell into the room. Blizzard pulled herself out from under the pile of human and Pokémon, hastily groomed herself, then resumed her usual calm demeanor as she approached Surge, and launched into her usual speach. "Shian! Persian shian. Persian shian shian persian perisna shian shian purrr shian per persian persian shian sian persain persain shian. Persian persian shian persian shian persian shan shan persian shan persian. Persian persian shan shan persain persian shan shan persian. Shan persian shan, shan SHAN! Persia persian persian shan. Purrrr persian persian shan persian shan persian persian shan shan shan purrrr." Surge sweatdropped. "Shian persian shan persianpersian shan shan persian persian shian purr. Persian shan shan persian. Persian shan persian shan shan persian, persian shan! Perushian shia purr shian shian..." <Oh for crying out loud,> Darwin scolded, <This is a simple Gym challenge, not a declaration of war. Get to the bloody point!> "Shian." <I am *trying* to get to my point, but it is extremely difficult, when your sapien conversation partner is unable to comprehend Persianese!> "I know!" Surge exclaimed, rummaging through his desk, "Ya don't get to be a pro at trainin' Electric Pokémon, without learning a thing or two 'bout electronics!" He withdrew a small black box, and held it out towards Blizzard. "This here's a Pokémon Translator! Just speak into the mic, and it'll solve all yer problems!" "Bui," Darwin snorted, <It wouldn't take a machine to do that. Just a few minutes alone in battle with a REAL Pokémon, to teach her some humility, and...> "SHAAN!" Blizzard roared at Darwin, to silence him. To Surge, she curtsied politely, and said, "Persian." The translator clicked, and whirred into action. "Greetings," it said, in a feminine, but unmistakably mechanical voice, "I am the one who the humans have named Blizzard. I have come here to implode..." Blizzard smacked the side of the translator, "...to explore..." "Shannn..." "...to ask that you relinquish the fabled Mjolnir." Surge blinked, unsure if the translator was still on the fritz. When Blizzard made no attempt to correct it, he carefully tried to confirm her statement, "You's interested in...Mjolnir?!?" "Shian." "Very. I have heard tales of its power, and I must say, I am intrigued. Please, allow me to have it." "But..." Surge protested, "I don't even know if youse is compatible!" "I am certain we will find a way to make things work." The Persian smiled coyly. "As they say, if you want something badly enough..." "Rai..." Samuraichu mumbled to no one in particular, <Surge must be in a generous mood today.> Orion turned to the oversized Raichu. "Hmm?" <They're already discussing TM compatibility, though neither one of them's even issued a challenge. Who knows...it looks like Surge may just GIVE her the TM.> Orion sweatdropped. "Are things ever that easy?" "So," Blizzard was saying, "do we have a deal?" Lieutenant Surge stroked his chin thoughtfully. "Well, I have no problem with lettin' go of Mjolnir...but in the end, I guess the choice should be up to him! Mjolnir, come out now!" Before Blizzard had a chance to question further, the ogre of a man pulled a Pokéball from his belt, and threw it to the floor, in front of her. There was a flash of light, and a hairy creature appeared between them. Like Blizzard, it was a cat Pokémon. However, while Blizzard was polished and well bred, it was a mangy characature. It stood on its hind legs, its inproportionately large forearms raised high in the air. Its football shaped head was framed by a pair of fuzzy antenna, and large tufts of fur, which protruded from its cheeks and scalp. Its bicuspids hardly fit in its thinly lipped mouth, as they were roughly the size and shape of peeled bananas; and to top it all off, there were black and yellow stripes running the entire length of its squat body. The creature turned toward Surge. "Ele?" "Hey, Mjolnir. Got a lady friend here to see ya." "Ele..." Because Mjolnir was so close to the translator, the device picked up his words as well. "Ya don't say." "Anyone you know?" "Ele..." The Electabuzz narrowed its eyes at Blizzard, and looked the Persian over, as if sizing her up. "Can't say I do. Must be another secret admirer." Mjolnir grinned widely, and licked his lips, "Well, you know I hate to disappoint a fan..." "Shian...." Blizzard stammered, backing beyond the range of the crudely constructed translator, <There's been a misunderstanding. I just wanted to learn Thunderbolt!> <No problem, baby.> Mjolnir leered, still marching towards her, <I'd be willing to teach it to ya, *personally*.> "SHANNN!" Losing all patience, Blizzard gave the advancing Electabuzz a hard Slash across the face. <Despite what your Neanderthal accomplice may have insinuated, I would rather mate with Giovanni's Persian, than a deformed mutant such as yourself. Now back off!> For a split second, the air around Mjolnir sparkled with electricity, as the Electabuzz bristled in pain and rage over being scorned. But, as quickly as the flash of emotion came, it was gone, and the Electabuzz resumed his brooding demeanor. <Your loss, babe. But if you wanna get a Thunderbolt TM now, we're gonna have to settle things the old fashioned way--ringside!> The Electabuzz pulled a black TM box from behind his back. <You win, and I'll give you one a these. But if you lose, you'll have to settle for a consolation prize!> Mjolnir puckered his lips, and leaned in toward the Persian's face. Blizzard hissed in response. "Now we're getting somewhere!" Although the Pokémon were no longer speaking into the translator, Surge seemed to have no trouble understanding their intentions. "Everybody out to the arena. An' after these two lovebirds are finished duking it out, I'll take on th' rest of you babies! If yer up to it, that is." The Lieutenant laughed, and his Raichu mimicked him. "Hey, Eevee boy!" Surge pointed at Orion, who, due to his proximity to Darwin and Keri, appeared to be their trainer, "I've got a Jolteon with your name on it!" "Bui! Eevee!" Darwin screamed, enraged by the accusation of being Orion's slave, <Lemmee at 'im! Lemmee at 'im! You big brute! I bet you didn't even ask that Jolteon if it wanted to evolve!> <Shhh...> Keri put a paw over Darwin's mouth, <You'll get your chance to fight. Meanwhile, it looks like you're getting your wish to see Blizzard battle...> <Bah.> Darwin snorted, <Against that Electabuzz? Like all trained Pokémon, he's a disgrace. So reliant on human coaching and TMed moves, that he's forgotten what it means to *really* fight! He wouldn't last ten seconds against a *real* Pokémon.> <Interesting,> Keri noted, <are all wild Pokémon so disdainful of their human-trained brethren?> "Shian." <Only the ones who know they can't beat them, on their own terms.> Blizzard jeered, as she brushed past the Eevees, into the gym. Darwin prepared to leap at the Persian again, but remembering what Keri had said earlier, about their constant fighting, he thought better of it. Instead, he grinned at the female Eevee, and said, <You're right. I *will* get my chance.> * * * "The Gym Leader, Lieutenant Surge, has chosen Electabuzz!" One of the Lieutenant's Juniors announced over the loudspeaker. "The challenger, 'Blizzard', has chosen Persian! Uh...where is 'Blizzard', anyway?" The Junior put down the sheet of paper that listed the trainers and their Pokémon choices, and waited for a human challenger to enter the field. After several minutes, he gave up. "Since 'Blizzard' has failed to report to the arena, it looks like his or her Persian is on its own! Persian and Electabuzz will fight until one is knocked out. There is no time limit. Trainers...er...trainER and Pokémon, are you ready? Begin!" "Woo." Orion cheered halfheartedly, from his place in the bleachers. "Bui." Keri hopped atop his shoulder, to get a better view. <I've never seen an Electabuzz in action before. And I wonder what Blizzard will do, to counter his Special-based attacks? This should be a very interesting battle, indeed.> Samuraichu shook his head. <This should be a very *fast* battle. Try not to blink.> Orion and Keri blinked in unison. "Huh?" <That Electabuzz is a powerful Pokémon, and an angry one, at that. The only thing that'll be 'interesting' about this battle, is seeing which moves he uses to slaughter her.> <Thanks for the vote of confidence.> Blizzard grumbled, overhearing. "Raichu..." Samuraichu laughed, embarrassed, <Good luck, Blizzard!> "Enough of this!" Surge cried, snapping them all back to attention, "Mjolnir, do your thing!" "Elllleeeebbbboooooo!!!" Mjolnir cried, running into the ring. He stopped short a few feet in front of Blizzard, took a bow, and slicked back his hair. <This 'ere's a little number for all the ladies in the ring tonight! What? There's only one? Well then, you'll get t' have everyone else's helpin' of whup ass too! Mjolnir, Thunder attack!> "Thunder attack?" Orion gasped, "Woah, this guy gets right down to business!" Keri sweatdropped. <You just noticed that?> A giant bolt of lightning crashed down from the sky, tore through the roof of the gym, and slammed into Blizzard with such force, that it threw her halfway across the arena. Waves of electricity still arching through her body, Blizzard attempted to stand up, but found that none of her limbs would respond. The announcer let out a cry of amazement, "Persian is completely Paralyzed!" "Good job, Mjolnir!" Surge exclaimed, from his place in the arena, "But could ya go a little easy on the architecture? The overhead on this place is high enough, without disasters comin' in from over head!" "Ele." Mjolnir scowled, <I get the job done. Unlike that flabby Raichu of yours...> "RAI!" Raichu screamed angrily, sparks of electricity shooting from its cheeks. "That's right, Raichu!" Surge responded, mistaking the Raichu's outburst for enthusiasm, "Mjolnir's kicking butt!" "Raichuu..." Raichu protested, even more upset, now that its master had praised the arrogant Electabuzz. "Shaaa..." Blizzard groaned, still struggling to get up. Mjolnir's face showed no emotion as he approached her. <Awww...poor little Persian. Face it, prissy snobs like you just don't have the stuff for fighting. Now tell me, does it hurt here?> He Mega Punched her in the stomach. <No? How about here?> He smacked her upside the head. <What about here?> The Electabuzz took her by the paw, and Seismic Tossed her into the ground. Blizzard let out a woof of pain. Mjolnir crouched down next to her. <Aw, see? You don't have to act tough with me--I still love you! Now, just show ol' Mjolnir where it hurts, and he'll kiss it allll better.> The Electabuzz cupped her jaw in his hands, raised it up to his head, and leaned in for a kiss. ...And got half his face taken off by Blizzard's Bite attack. <Never...> The Persian dug her claws deep into the floor of the arena, and with an enormous amount of effort managed to drag herself to her feet. <...Can't...be beaten. Not... by...you...> Mjolnir snarled, and wiped the blood out of his eyes. <Face it, doll. You're already beaten. And you'll never get one a these.> The Electabuzz withdrew the TM, and flashed it in front of her. Big mistake. What followed next was a flurry of activity. Blizzard reared back on her hind legs, and with her last amount of strength, threw herself at Mjolnir. The Electabuzz was caught off guard, and the TM box went tumbling to the ground, where it split open, spilling powder all over the grappling Pokémon. Blizzard rolled twice, and came to a stop, Mjolnir landing hard on top of her. Like a bomb that had been struck with enough force to warrant an explosion, the Persian released a massive blast of electricity, which sent Mjolnir flying into a wall. The Electabuzz slid down to the floor, and fell over, unconscious. "FOUL!" Surge cried, "Using TMs durin' a match is illegal! 'Specially when the TM ain't even yours!" He stormed over to Blizzard, who had since fainted from exertion, grabbed her by the nape of the neck, and easily hefted her into the air. "I hearby disqualify you from th' match, and rescind any victory that might otherwise be awarded!" Orion, Keri, and Samuraichu all facefaulted, astounded to hear Surge use such big words. The Lieutenant marched up to Mjolnir, and gave the Electabuzz a kick in the stomach, to wake him. "Go get yourself cleaned up, baby! We have other matches to fight today!" The Electabuzz whimpered, and limped off to the showers, plotting his revenge, and hoping to catch one of the female Juniors naked. Surge tossed Blizzard roughly into the bleachers, and returned to his end of the arena, preparing for his next challenge. Samuraichu gave the Persian a tap on the nose. <Hey, Blizzard. Do you want me to take you to the Pokémon Center?> "Shian." Blizzard smiled weakly, <And cause me to miss Darwin's battle? Never. Besides, thanks to that Thunderbolt TM, I feel supercharged! Now I know why you Electric types are always so hyper...> <Yeah!> Samuraichu grinned. <I'll toast to that! To Electric attacks, there are none better!> That said, he 'toasted' Blizzard with a weak Thundershock, that was just strong enough to make her fur stand on end. "Shian," Blizzard responded, <To Electric attacks.> She tried to shock him back, but ended up electrocuting herself! <Purr...I can see...how this could take some getting used to...> she mumbled, before lapsing back into unconsciousness. TBC -Beth, of the ever changing sig. Lone member of the Butch and Cassidy Fanclub! Holder of 25 Zeni Points! And 20 Kanji Moder Points! (whatever those are)