From: RobfromVoid (RobfromVoid@prodigy.net)
Subject: [PW!] What Day Is It Today?
Newsgroups: alt.games.nintendo.pokemon
Date: 2000/04/01
>"I gotta see if that really was the Slowbro rider," thought John. he
>made sure he had no caffine-related gas in him, then after he >was sure
>his hello wouldn't come out as a loud burp, he walked over to the teen,
>who was waiting at the door of a house. >"Excuse me," he asked the boy,
>"but are you by any chance the Slowbro rider from the last Big P Pokémon
>Race?"
"Huh?" Robert turns away from the door leading into Rilli's house, which
has yet to be opened after a long time of waiting, and he faces John
Laramie, who looks vaguely familiar, "Yes, I am by any chance the
Slowbro rider! My Slowbro came in 6th place... somehow... I think it had
to do with the fact that I taught him the Swift TM that RK Evojian gave
me. I'll let you take a look at the magnificent steed that I rode to
victory... or 6th place, rather... Slowbro, go!" Robert snaps the fifth
Pokeball on his belt off and throws it onto Rilli's front yard, right
next to where John is standing.
When the pink Slowbro emerges from the Pokeball in a flash of bright red
light, he is asleep - sprawled on the grass, both arms and both legs
spread apart, with drool coming out of his gaping jaw and also from the
serrated grin of the Shellder on his tail. Slowbro's eyes start to blink
open and the Shellder's eyes follow, until Slowbro is fully conscious
(or at least as conscious as a Slowbro gets). He opens his mouth wider
than usual and lets out a loud yawn, "SLOOOOOOOOOOOOW!" Once he is
finished yawning, he starts struggling ever so slowly to stand up. His
attempts to get up make him look even sillier.
John tries to avoid laughing at the goofy-looking big fat pink mass that
is Slowbro, "Ah, yes, magnificent steed. Riiiight."
Robert senses a tone of sarcasm so he asks, "I think you were riding on
a Dodrio, right? Where did your Pokemon place?"
"That's not important!" John replies quickly, then decided to change the
subject, "Besides, I don't breed my Pokemon to race like the rest of the
Laramie clan. No, not John Laramie! Oh yeah, that's my name, by the way.
What's yours?"
"My name's Robert! Please wear it out - I need publicity! No one knows
who I am since I haven't beaten the Elite Four yet." The 18-year-old
teenager pauses then says, "If you don't breed your Pokemon to race,
John, what do you breed them for?"
"Different reasons." John shrugs and explains himself, "I've been in
different Pokemon organizations where my Pokemon helped in various ways,
but right now I'm working here in Lavender Town for Mr. Fuji, so I guess
now I'm raising my Pokemon to help with my current project. What are you
doing here in Lavender Town if you haven't beaten the Elite Four? And
more specifically, what are you doing at this house? This isn't exactly
a Pokemon Trainer tourist attraction..."
Robert points to the ordinary house whose porch he is standing on, "This
is my girlfriend's house! Do you remember Rilli? She entered the race
riding Deimos, her Doduo. I'm over here today because I just turned 18
years old, and I'm sure that she has a birthday surprise for me, but
I've been waiting here for the longest time, and she still hasn't opened
the door! Rilli and I both settled here in Lavender Town to found a
Diversity Gym so that I can train for the Elite Four. My Gym would be
built by now if it weren't for the people building the Gym- they are too
lazy, burly, surly, rear-end-scratching, good-for-nothing..."
John interrupts Robert, "Ahem, that's the project I'm working for. I'm
one of the people turning the warehouse into a Gym."
The sweatdrop that appears on Robert's face covers most of his cheek,
"Did I say too lazy? I meant... err... too mazing! I must've forgotten
to put the 'a' in front of the word, because I actually meant 'too
amazing'! And about all that other stuff... I actually meant that...
Well, let's just say that scratching your own rear end isn't necessarily
a bad thing. I mean, even *I've* done it a few times... not that I'm
implying that I'm better than you... but what I'm trying to say is
that..."
"Let me guess. 'April Fool'?" John Laramie asks with his arms crossed
and his eyes slightly narrowed in sarcastic disbelief.
Robert snaps his fingers, "Of course! April Fool! Why didn't I think of
that?" He rubs his chin, genuinely trying to figure out why he didn't
think of that, until he realizes, "Hey! It's not April 1st - it's March
18th. I think I'd know when my own birthday was!"
John shakes his head, "I'm sorry to disappoint you, birthday boy. Check
your watch - it really is April 1st. No foolin'!"
Robert pulls back one black sleeve and looks down at his wristwatch,
"Hmm, it says SA 1." He looks at John with a shocked expression, "Yikes!
That means I've been waiting for Rilli to answer the door for two whole
weeks without knowing it!"
"Man, if that's true, you're slower than your Slowbro!" John glances at
Robert's Slowbro, who is still trying to stand up without much success.
The Shellder on Slowbro's tail rolls his eyes at the Slowbro whose tail
he is biting, now wishing he had picked a more competent Slowbro to
latch onto. John sighs since Slowbro's condition isn't quite as funny
anymore, and he helps Slowbro stand up. A few seconds after getting up,
Slowbro sluggishly raises his arms in victory, "Ahh, Slowbro!"
Robert reaches behind his head to show embarrassment, "Look, John, I'm
sorry I called you all those things. I realize it was wrong for me to
assume that all the people building my Gym are too lazy. Now that this
story's moral has been stated, I invite you to my belated birthday
party, which I'm absolutely sure Rilli must have ready by now! Please
note that this offer is void if Rilli opens the door wearing nothing but
a smile." Robert knocks on the door, waiting for Rilli's late birthday
response.
-Robert