From: Marco262 (marco262@yahoo.com) Subject: [PW!] What happens when diety-intervention and bad eating habits collide... Newsgroups: alt.games.nintendo.pokemon Date: 2000/05/27 (I'm gonna try this post in 1st person. If all goes well, I might start a trend.) Brick walls are very hard. I thought you should know this. Unfortunately, I had to find this out the hard way. I pulled myself up off the ground and took stock of my surroundings. A beach stretched in both directions, taking a sharp turn and stopping right before the alley way. I decided I liked cold and dank places and went to check further. A paratrooper gazed up at me from behind his newspaper. It's kind of odd that you can find newspaper's at the top of flagpoles. I didn't discuss it with him. I turned out to be a good idea after he spontaneously combusted into dozens of shards of pineapple. I crossed the street, hoping to find less chemically unstable people to talk to. Women in tuxedoes passed me under newpapers, to sheild themselves from the driving snow. Someone offered me one, but there's too much bad news anyways so I declined. She shrugged and shot me with her pistol. Waves of pain swirled around me, although they weren't mine. An Ekans lunged at me from behind her, blood trailing down it's dirtridden body from the two-inch hole that resided in the side of it's head, taking an eye as rent. It was quickly joined by a trenchcoat clad Jigglypuff. The pink balloon delved into the bloody hole and produced a shiny black marker. It shoved it through my left eye and took the bus home. The buildings took their leave from my field of vision, but I was soon visited by dancing pokémon corpses. The funky beat was so contagious that I just had to dance. But you know how losing an eye ruins your depth perception. I ran into a brick wall. The girl with the red hair laughed. And laughed. And laughed!!! And laughed!!!!!!! AND LAUGHED!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND LAUUUUUUUUuuuuuuuuuuuu... I awoke screaming, with all eyes on me. Nurse Joy was shaking me awake from my makeshift bed on the Pokémon Center waiting bench. If anyone wondered how much pepperoni and marshmallow pizza a guy could eat in one sitting, my answer was soon displayed on the Center's floor. Four hours and a carpet cleaning bill later, the sun broke over the houses of Pallet. I glanced at the overused story scene for a second and went back to conversing with my newly acquired pokémon. "You mean Lewis and Bridget never named you?" Both pokémon shook their heads. It's amazing that people can not be even the least bit creative in picking something as important as a name for their pokémon. I leaned forward. "You know, I think I have the perfect names for you two." I turned to the Alakazam. "Mens'osc." Then to the Fearow. "Ćther. What do you think." Pardus cheered at my talent in choosing names. The others weren't so sure, but smiled anyway and nodded. I followed suite.