Subject: [PW!] Food For Thought Date: 31 Dec 2001 00:22:13 -0800 From: bandraptor@yahoo.com (Bandraptor) Organization: http://groups.google.com/ Newsgroups: alt.games.nintendo.pokemon Avalanche the Tyranitar is storming through the streets of Goldenrod City with earthshaking stomps, causing dense crowds to part in front of him like oceans before Lugia, and generally making heads turn. A middle aged woman looks up at the Persian on the Tyranitar's left shoulder, and the Tentacool on the Tyranitar's right shoulder, shakes her head at the thought of such a large Pokémon being used to carry around two very small Pokémon, and comments, "How wasteful!" The gentleman with her echoes her sentiment, "They must've gotten it during that Azalea Alt-Types Debacle," referring to a controversial deal some years back that enabled Azalea residents to purchase Steel and Dark-type Pokémon at greatly reduced prices. "<This is a pretty smooth ride,>" Blizzard comments, as they breeze through the crowd. "<It> cool<ing better be, for what we paid.>" Sting replies. He turns to Blizzard, who seems to be greatly enjoying her ride on Avalanche's left shoulder, "<Hey, wanna change?>" Blizzard shrugs, "<All right.>" She crawls onto Avalanche's right shoulder, while Sting swings over to his left shoulder, "Shan, <That was a good idea."> "Cool <yeah...>" Sting starts to respond, when Avalanche suddenly stops, and plops himself down in the middle of the road like a stubborn Donphan. If Sting's mouth was visible, he would undoubtedly be scowling as he spits, "<What the> cool <just happened?> Tent! <I bet that> tentacool tent tentcool <at the> cool<ing Game Corner sold us a> tent<ing lemon!>" He hops off of Avalanche's shoulder, and, standing tall on his two tentacles, hobbles over to the Tyranitar's front, where he pries Avalanche's mouth open, and proceeds to look inside, "<When I get hold of that> tenting tent cool <I'm gonna Poison Sting him where the sun don't shine!>" Blizzard, too, jumps down from her perch, walking around Avalanche the long way, before joining Sting at the head. "Purr. <What seems to be the problem?>" Blizzard's interjection causes Sting to pull his head out of the Tyranitar's mouth, rather fortuitous, since Avalanche's jaws crash down in a Crunch attack a mere instant later. "<Does he have lockjaw?>" The Tyranitar's perpetual scowl becomes a bit deeper than usual, as he expresses clear annoyance over being deprived his act of violence. In answer to Blizzard's question, he opens his jaws once again, and simply states, "<Feed me.>" "<Feed you?>" Sting blurts out angrily, "<Feed you?!?! We gave you a whole> cool<ing TANK of Poliwags on the way out of the Game Corner! We've only GONE> cool<ing half a mile, and> tent <if we're gonna feed you again after-->" "Persian," Blizzard cuts him off, "<whether we like it or not, the fact of the matter is that we will have to fuel him properly, if we wish for him to function.>" She looks around, "<Considering the number of stores in this area, I am certain that we will be able to find an inexpensive food depository...I believe we passed a Pokémon-N-Out...>" "Ran." Avalanche shakes his head, then pulls out a small book, and hands it to Sting. "<According to the manual,>" Sting reads, "<He only takes high-Octillery...whatever the> cool <that is.>" The Tentacool closes his eyes in deep thought, and when he reopens them, he speaks with an air of authority, "<Blizzard, we can't keep him.>" Blizzard lets out a cry of alarm, "<What?>" "<The Tyranitar. We can't keep him.>" Blizzard's lower lip begins to tremble, "<B-but why?>" "<Well,>" Sting lets her down gently, "<Because it'll cost too much to feed him. And care for him. And insure him. And also because he's a major league> tent<hole who's trying to off us both.>" "<Oh.>" Blizzard's sea blue eyes well up with tears, and she whispers, "<Well Avalanche, I guess this is it...>" Pikachu's Goodbye begins to play in the background, as we are treated to a montage of scenes of Blizzard and Avalanche together: Blizzard spotting Avalanche for the first time, Blizzard saying goodbye to Avalanche, the whole thing is really quite touching. When it's all over, Blizzard wipes the tears from her fur with the back of a paw, and murmurs, "Goodbye...Avalanche..." "<Bye.>" Avalanche rolls his eyes, and stomps off towards Route 35, muttering something so vulgar in that it causes Sting to do a double take. Blizzard continues to whimper a few minutes after the Tyranitar's departure, until at last, Sting feels obliged to say something. "<For> tentacool <Blizzard, you only knew him for two hours!>" "<I know...>" Blizzard sniffles. "<I'm sad, because I didn't get to eat him.>" "<...Oh.>" Sting responds. "<Okay, I know what'll cheer you up. Let's go get some dinner. I hear there's a great pizza place over by the Train Station. Called Pizzeria Articuno's. Serves Kanto-style pies.>" "Purrr, <pizza.>" Blizzard immediately returns to herself, "<An excellent suggestion. I will have mine with vegetation-flavored sauce, and cheese product on top.>" "<Just don't order it with squid,"> Sting shudders, "<That makes me feel> cool<ing weird, you know what I'm saying?>" "<Of course, Sting. I am sensitive to your feelings as a cephalopod.>" Blizzard replies, "This time, I will get octopus instead.>" "<...>" TBC?