From: Dominus Fenix (dash53@aol.com.Oni)
Subject: [PW!][NC] When Lucky Numbers Go Bad
Newsgroups: alt.games.nintendo.pokemon
Date: 2001-03-31 22:21:17 PST
[PW!][NC] When Lucky Numbers Go Bad
Daah, remember this is NC.
--
One day, in the city of Goldenrod, there lived a man. A man entrusted with what
would seem as small power, but undeniable huge - he told the people whether
they had won the lottery. Or rather, the Lucky Numbers show.
Entrusted with power can go to one's head, so this was no different.
The man, whose name was Bob (SPELL IT BACKWARDS) decided, that he hated his
job. He just did. So, one day, he decided to piss people off BY NEVER LETTING
THEM WIN.
One day, a little boy, by the name of Billy, gave the man his Pokédex, and
asked in a whiny voice:
"Hey mister, did I win the Lucky Numbers show?" The number for that week was
42422.
Bob took his Pokédex and slid it into the computer slot. The number read 42422
on the screen, and it was Billy's Trainer ID. Bob scowled. Pressing a few keys,
he changed the number of the week to 8008135, and named his favorite Pokemon in
storage, "PIKACHU", to "PIKACHEW".
He turned back to Billy.
"Whoa! I don't believe it!"
"What mister, what? Did I win?" asked Billy enthusiastically. He had tears of
joy in his eyes.
"You've??"
"Yes..?!!?"
"LOST! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!" Bob shoved the Pokédex in Billy's hands.
"YOU LOSE, I WIN! MWAHHAHAHAHA!" cackled Bob, with a demonic glint in his eyes
and a huge grin. He started dancing around and pointing at Billy.
Billy began to cry.
"Hey (sniff), M-m-(choke)ister, w-what was the number?"
"It was 12345. G'way." Billy left.
That same day, a man named Fenix, after training his L5 Larvitar to a L55
Tyranitar, and beat the Elite Four around fifty times to garner the money to
drug boost, walked into the Tower in hopes to win a Miracleberry, or a PP Up.
"Yeah, hi. Can you check if I won or not?"
"Sure," said Bob with another trademark grin. He turned around, and fed the
Pokédex into the computer. The Trainer ID#, was indeed, 8008135, matching this
week's forged number.
"What the hell??" asked Bob. "I'll have to remedy that." Bob was about to type
in 69699 as the new number, but before he could, Fenix looked over Bob's
shoulder and saw him changing the number.
"HEY! YOU BASTARD! I WON THE LUCKY NUMBER SHOW! GIMME A MASTERBALL!"
"Uh, you LOST."
"No I didn't! I saw you change the number! Look!" Bob had deleted half of
8008135.
"No, you didn't see anything."
"So that's why nobody ever wins! YOU always change the number!"
"Actually, uh,- yeah, so what?! Wouldn't you do the same thing?!"
"That's not the point!"
In his frustration, Fenix banged the desk with both hands. It rattled something
under the dex, and a box fell out and spilled its contents on the floor?which
happened to be Masterballs. On the box, was scrawled "Bob's Stuff" in red
crayon.
"Yoink!" Fenix grabbed the box. "THAT'S FOR THREE MILLION TRIES TO GET THESE
DAMN THINGS!" He dashed out the door, and began throwing some of the
Masterballs to people waiting on the line.
"THOSE ARE MINE!" WAIT!"
Fenix pitched a Masterball at Bob's nose, which clamped onto his nose. Bob
cried in pain and tried to wrench it off his nose.
"ATTICA! ATTICA! THE PRIZES ARE OURS!"
The crowd then started pelting Bob with the hard metal spheres, causing him to
fall to the earth, twitching and screaming. Bob was knocked unconcious, his
last coherent thought that of huge balls from space smashing him into the
pavement.
Bob's final scream was so loud, that it toppled the Radio Tower and the people
did not have to listen to the worthless "Oak's Pokemon Talk" and "Places and
People"
shows no longer. Then, items rained from the sky, and there was much rejoicing.
THE END
--
-Dominus Fenix.