Subject: [PW!] Someone Is Dumber Than PK, Part 2
Date: 16 Jul 2002 14:42:00 GMT
From: andyvvv@aol.com.geable (Andrusi- Apprentice of Kopaka)
Organization: AOL http://www.aol.com
Newsgroups: alt.games.nintendo.pokemon
When we last left our idiots, PK, Stupid, and Weak, they had encountered an
ugly bald guy who thought he was Sigma.
"Is that you, Signas? No, you're too small to be Signas."
"I AM PK BALL, YOU IDIOT!" PK shouted. "And I shall be your undoing!"
'Sigma' paused, lost in thought, then smiled. "I see. You are a pack of new
Maverick Hunters sent to find out what I'm doing. Well, I'm sorry, but you
won't be reporting back to headquarters. Although I appear to be alone, I am
in fact guarded by my most powerful generals, who will now dispose of you." He
pulled a Pokéball from behind his back; it had a crappy Maverick insignia drawn
on it in crayon. "Attack, Storm Eagle!"
PK stared.
Weak stared.
Stupid ran around in circles.
GEODUDOO stared and bumped someone up on his list.
Osiris stared, but you're suppposed to think he died with the BBB, so he
doesn't count.
Finally, PK spoke. "...It's a Pidgey."
"You fool!" Sigma shouted. "This is Storm Eagle, the terror of the skies! Use
your Storm Tornado!"
'Storm Eagle' obediently fired a Whirlwind in no particular direction.
GEODUDOO was killed, but everyone else felt only a light breeze. It was
evidently a level 2 Pidgey.
After a few minutes, PK stopped laughing long enough to say "Stupid,
Thundershock."
Stupid stopped running around in circles and shocked GEODUDOO's dead body,
reviving him and causing him to say "GEODUDOO WAS ONLY FAKING IT". The Pidgey
fainted simply from being nearby, and for some reason Sigma tossed a Whirlwind
TM over to PK.
"What's this for?" PK asked.
"You mean Maverick Hunter HQ isn't even bothering to tell you about weapon
copying anymore?" Sigma replied. "Sheesh. Anyway, you may have been lucky
this time, but you'll never defeat... BUBBLE CRAB!"
Without being prompted, Weak tapped the Krappy--er, the Krabby--lightly on the
forehead. It tipped over.
"You are unusually strong Maverick Hunters," Sigma said. "But you'll never
survive your encounter with Armored Armadillo!"
"That's not even an armadillo."
"Yes it is."
"It's a Donphan. That's an elephant. And it seems to have fallen asleep out
of boredom."
"Oh. Well then, Launch Octopus will surely be your destruction!"
"Great. An Octillery. Appears to have a broken tentacle."
"It's not broken, it's... new technology."
"It's broken. And while we were arguing, Stupid knocked it out. Next."
"Fine... VOLT CATFISH!"
"A Chinchou? I get the Volt and the Fish, but where's the Cat?"
"Shut up. Volt Catfish, Triad Thunder!"
"That's a cruddy little spark."
"Quiet! It's his all-powerful Triad Thunder!"
"All-powerful? It missed and hit GEODUDOO, and *HE* survived it."
"GEODUDOO HAS JUST BUMPED YOU ALL THE WAY TO THE TOP OF HIS LIST." GEODUDOO
then successfully KOed Volt Catfish, which was such an accomplishment for him
that he himself passed out.
"Fine, fine, maybe those first five Mavericks aren't so great. But I've saved
the best for last... go, Wheel Gator!"
Sigma threw his last Pokéball, and out came... a Feraligator the size of a
freaking space shuttle.
"Chu?"
"Ras?"
"GEODUDOO IS SURPRISED AT THIS UNEXPECTED TURN OF EVENTS."
"Oh my Kurt..."
To be continued...
(And so PK meets his first real challenge! How badly will he get his butt
kicked? Find out next time I manage to get AOL to take me to AGNP!)
-Andrusi &&
Sanity not included.