Subject: [PW!] The Battle Date: 15 Sep 2002 14:24:22 -0700 From: asverner@unity.ncsu.edu (Andrusi) Organization: http://groups.google.com/ Newsgroups: alt.games.nintendo.pokemon ---Origin Story--- It was a dark and stormy night. Not the type of night that broke amateur Pokémon trainers particularly enjoy. Especially when said trainer has a Pokémon in serious peril. "Oh, Shocktart, I'm so sorry," Erin said as she held her dying Pikachu. His Pokéball lay forgotten on a nearby rock. "I should never have made you fight that Tauros..." "Pi... ka..." Shocktart answered her. His eyes were closed, and he was almost too weak to "speak". "I'm so sorry... I didn't know what I was doing..." This was in fact true. Erin could barely think straight; her funds had run so low, she hadn't even eaten in two days. She literally had nothing except Shocktart, his Pokéball, and the clothes on her back. Had she been older, there would have been a few solutions available (I'm sure you can guess). But Erin was ten years old. "Pi..." "I just... I didn't know what to do... I still don't know what to do..." Erin was crying and hugging her Pikachu, all the while convincing herself that it would be better if it just ended now. And it did. At that moment a bolt of lightning struck a tree and passed through Erin and Shocktart's bodies and the Pokéball. Erin slumped over and fell off the rock. Nothing moved. Except the Pokéball, which... ...fell off the rock and landed on the ground next to Erin's body and was subsequently crushed to bits by the boots of a rescue team. A memorial service was held for the girl, a smaller one for the Pikachu, and none for the Pokéball. At the same time, about a mile away, a more successful trainer accidentally left one of his Pokéballs behind, on another rock. That rock was also struck by lightning. The Pokéball floated into the area, heard the sirens in the distance, and said to itself "Gee, I wonder what all the fuss is about?" He was interrupted from his thoughts by a curious Pikachu unrelated to the one mentioned earlier, who said to him "Pika... pika... pika..." ---------- ========== ---------- "...PIKA!" PK blinked, which is very hard to do when you have no eyes, except he'd had plenty of practice by now. "Whuh?" "Pika! Pi chupika pika chu!" Stupid shouted, frantically indicating the Feraligatr about to turn them all into a thin film across the bottom of its foot. "Oh, you're right, there is indeed a Feraligatr about to turn us all into a thin film across the bottom of its foot OH MY KURT RUN!" And so they did. Except for PK, who just kinda floated, and GEODUDOO, who didn't move at all, and Sigma, who was of course commanding the Feraligatr. "GEODUDOO WILL DESTROY YOU. GEODUDOO WILL BREAK YOUR FEET AND HAND. GEODUDOO IS--" The foot began coming down. "--ABOUT TO DIE. GEODUDOO IS SCARED." The foot hit GEODUDOO... and bounced off. The Feraligatr fell over and hit its head on a boulder. "YES! GEODUDOO IS INVINCIBLE!" At that point a Pidgey pooped on GEODUDOO, who passed out. PK chuckled. "What a pathetic trainer." "Pathetic?" Sigma cried out. "I'll show you pathetic! Velgauder, attack!" "Velgauder?" "Hmm. Well, I'll destroy you myself!" Sigma swung his plastic lightsaber at PK. It snapped in half. Then Sigma popped several plastic knives out of his gloves. They broke off as he swung them. "You! You beat me!" "I didn't even do anything," PK said. "Only X can beat me... ... ...you're X! In new armor! I should have recognized you! I will haunt you to the day you die, X!!!!" PK stared as the bald guy ran off into the woods. "What a moron." ---------- ========== ---------- I kinda liked doing a serious-looking bit at the beginning. Fun. That's why the subject was so generic, BTW. I wanted to confuse you all into thinking I was about to start a new character or something. Aren't I evil?