Subject: [PW!] The Marketing Game Date: Sun, 29 Sep 2002 12:37:32 +0000 (UTC) From: "Steffan Alun" <ic3duck@hotmail.com> Organization: BT Openworld Newsgroups: alt.games.nintendo.pokemon "Here at ComComCom (the Complete Communications Company), we always value quality and reliability above all else. While we may not make much money annually, we are positive that we are in fact SAVING millions by producing reliable hardware and EARNING millions by encouraging customers to return to the company for further purchases. "We are very careful with our money. We ensure that we know every detail of a scheme before investing any money in it. This means that we know exactly what we have set out to achieve and can also guarantee to share-holders and customers that their money and warantees are safe." -- from "ComComCom - A Bright Future For Bright People", published December 2001 Pokewars!: Ralph Harrison & Mike Smith "The Marketing Game" Steffan Alun Mike Smith cautiously opened his boss's door. It wasn't that he was afraid of the man; it was simply that opening doors cautiously was a good idea in a building where heating was not covered by the budget. "Excuse me, sir," said Mike meekly. If Ralph Harrison had heard his assistant, he did a very good job of hiding it. "I have a report from the Research Department," Mike continued, not wanting to waste time. Mr Harrison did not look up. This wasn't because he was uninterested; quite the opposite, in fact. Due to the fact that the Research Department was actually a small room containing two teenagers and the company's only computer with internet access, reports were not often produced there. The reason Mr Harrison did not look at his assistant was because he was in the middle of reading a book entitled "How To Suck Seed In Business". While it was not exactly what he'd had in mind when ordering it over the internet, it was interesting enough. The pictures were more than enough to keep him occupied. "Shall I read it?" asked Mike. Mr Harrison gave no response. "I'll start reading, then, and if you want me to stop, you can give me a sign." Mr Harrison gave what might have been interpreted as a nod, so Mike began to read from the report. "'The most recent development in communication hardware has been the combining of a mobile phone and the existing Pokédex. In a world where Pokémon are becoming more popular and more important to life every day, they're the key to selling many a product. The theory is as follows.' There's a diagram then, sir, which you may want to look at." Mr Harrison looked at Mike for the first time in two weeks. He didn't have very high hopes for the diagram. "Show me," he said, using a random piece of paper from his desk to keep his place in the book. The diagram was roughly drawn in a yellow crayon, but the idea was: Product1 popularity = x Product2 popularity = y Cost = z Product1 and product2 popularity (i.e. "buy a [product1] get a [product2] free") = (x + y)/z Product1 and product2 combination (i.e. "[product1] with new [product2] design") = xy/z Mr Harrison read the notes underneath. 'While the equations may seem a bit abstract, it boils down to this; slap a Pokémon on any product and any fool will buy it.' This got Mr Harrison's attention. This was because he knew he could use this theory as a stepping stone to something greater. No-one in ComComCom was willing to work for their money. He knew for a fact that the report he was currently reading had been written while the internet was down. Mr Harrison himself, however, had joined the company with dreams of putting it on the map. This attitude had gained him many promotions, which was why he was now the manager of the Goldenrod marketing office. However, there wasn't much he could do with an office full of people who wanted to make as much money as possible with as little effort as possible. This idea was perfect, though. He'd simply tell everyone he was 'slapping a Pokémon' on products while he was, in fact, creating a new means of communication. It should be mentioned at this point that Mr Harrison's morality and sense of selfless ambition is barely skin deep. Yes, he wanted to make a name for the company and aid the customers, but this was simply because he'd been raised by a morally perfect father. Few people can work at ComComCom for three years and have an unaffected sense of optimism. Ralph Harrison was no exception. Neither was Mike Smith, as it happens, but Mike was not as incompetent or frustrated as his superior. He was only in this job because he needed to support his family. With a wife working full-time, the benefits of working at ComComCom were very good; the tea ladies took care of his young Growlithe while he worked and he could take a break at half-past-three to pick up his twelve-year-old daughter from school. However, Mike's family life is far too trivial to mention now, especially with Mr Harrison planning his next move. Mr Harrison was not a stupid man. He was actually quite intelligent. However, metaphorically speaking, his brain and body were not the best of friends. There are people in the world who can imagine a beautiful scene, and simply draw it exactly as they imagined. There are many more people who can draw what they see with considerable accuracy. There are people who can't draw, but can describe perfectly what they want people to see. There are people who can write it in prose or poetry. Very few people are completely devoid of such skills. Mr Harrison was a part of that minority. If he were an architect, his blueprints would be a square with a triangle on top with some strategically placed rectangles on the front. He'd make a neat job of it, of course; he'd use a ruler and would label it with words such as "roof" and "doormat" in his best handwriting. However, it wouldn't get him far. That's why he'd joined ComComCom; he wanted a mindless job where he could help the business make it big. Namely, the marketing office in Goldenrod. He simply needed to find out what people wanted and report back. No creativity needed. Sadly, his dream was not to be. He was so good at his expertise that he was promoted to manager. No-one told him what to do in terms of marketing now, so the company had rapidly deteriorated. He had plenty of good ideas, of course, but no way to implement them. For example, he wanted a pet Pokémon for the office. He knew in his mind exactly what he wanted - something lovable, friendly, neat and inoffensive. The result was - because of his inability to put his ideas into context - a Koffing. He wanted to give him a name that represented his looks, his nature or both. The resulting name was Fluffer. The idea that was beginning to form in Mr Harrison's mind was to target areas where both Pokémon and various pieces of hardware produced by ComComCom were popular, and to modify ComComCom's products to meet their needs as trainers, owners and friends. The idea that was going to be implemented, however, was to connect all major towns and cities in Johto (and possibly Kanto if there was time) with telephone and electric cables to give ComComCom the ability to spy on all uses of phones, modems, fax machines and PokéGears. Of course, explaining this idea to the head office would be difficult, especially since the idea itself was not yet a part of Mr Harrison's warped mind. Without thinking about it, Mr Harrison dialed the number for head office. "Hello?" came the voice at the end, giving Mr Harrison a vivid image of someone who had spent very little time asleep recently. "Hi," said Mr Harrison. Hearing his own voice, he stared at the phone. Why had he phoned head office? His plan wasn't ready yet. "Who's speaking?" "It's Harrison, from the marketing unit." "What do you want?" What DID he want? "I have an idea to submit to the president of the company." Mr Harrison frowned. Why had he asked for the president? There was no need for things to go that far. Fortunately, the president of ComComCom was not a busy man by any stretch of the imagination, so he quickly came to the phone. "Hello, Harrison," came the gruff voice of the company's president, whose name Mr Harrison could not recall at the time. "Hello, sir," said Mr Harrison. "I want to submit an idea." "Go ahead." "Pokémon have recently become very popular, so I thought we could target Pokémon trainers to whom to sell our products." "We're already in the middle of targetting religious groups," replied the president. "Upon your own recommendation, if I recall." Mr Harrison remembered that recommendation clearly. He had no recollection of why he'd suggested the idea, though. It had probably been Mike's idea or something. "I intended to target both," said Mr Harrison, deciding to cover his tracks. "The Johto League is incredibly popular nowadays, whereas only veterans battle gyms in Kanto." Realising that he was reading from the report, Mr Harrison spun his chair to face the window. "Because of this, Johto should be used as our main customers from the Pokémon side of things." "There's not much we can do, then," said the president hotly. "Only the marketing and testing units are based in Johto. We couldn't afford to buy any factories there." "That's why I'm offering my own services. Transfer a third of the manufacturing budget to my office, and I'll begin a pilot study instantly in Goldenrod." "A third of..." "It's barely significant considering we're already doubling our allocated funds annually." Mr Harrison tried to think where he'd read that. Had he read it at all? Was it even true? It must be true, he thought. Why else would he have said it? "You seem to believe this'll work," came the gruff voice of the president. "Goddish knows we need to do better than we're doing now. Fine, then. Within the hour, you'll control one third of ComComCom's annual budget. Remember this, though; if you fail to return the same ammount of money to head office by the end of this year at the latest, you'll be out of a job. I hope for the sake of the company that that won't happen." The president hung up. Mr Harrison attempted to do the same, but absent-mindedly dropped the receiver on the floor. Mike walked over and replaced the receiver in its rightful position. "Shall I leave now?" he asked. Getting no reply, he left. Mr Harrison continued to read his book, forming perfectly innocent ideas about the use of a large sum of money which would inevitably become a part of something incredibly random. Something which could very well have led to a complete waste of time and money. Something which did lead, however, to something dangerous, controversial, time-consuming, and very, very illegal. I wanted to do something different to the generic trainer-with-a-dream plot. This was the result. I'll make some [WG]s eventually, but it's self-explanatory really. -- Steffan A large collection of plagarism: http://iceduck.pkmn.co.uk