From: Steffan Alun (ic3duck@hotmail.com) Subject: [PW!] Make ROOM for PHOOM! Newsgroups: alt.games.nintendo.pokemon Date: 2003-12-17 11:11:52 PST "Well, ladies and gentlemen," said a man whose name was Grrrrrrrrrowl. "We are gathered here today to see the joining of the following of two items; THIS dagger and THIS gentleman's face." Grrrrrrrrrowl revealed a golden dagger and a man in a suit who was tied up like some kind of prisoner. "Yay!" and "Woo!" cheered his audience, a roomful of people in suits and dresses. The women in suits and the men in dresses. It was a gender-bender murder. Grrrrrrrrrowl straightened his bra and led the room in singing the traditional knife-to-the-face song: "We are here to see a man Who did bad things to our fine group. We are here to see him die And his blood spill like slimy gloop. We are here to laugh at him And to point and make him blush. We are here to cut him up And put his bits in the toilet and flush. We are here to see...'insert name of...' Grrrrrrrrrowl End 'insert...' Joshua's life with a knife We are here to witness all And send a letter to his wife." Grrrrrrrrrowl picked up the golden knife of ritual killing. He slowly moved the blade towards the victim, whose name was Joshua, and prepared to penetrate his heart. PokéWars!: Phenomelous Marvaleon "Make ROOM for PHOOM!" Steffan Alun "OUT OF THE WAY!" exclaimed Phenomelous Marvaleon, who was known as Phoom to his friends. People got out of the way. And then got back in the way when they saw that it was Phoom who had told them to get out of the way. "Stop him you fools!!!" triple-exclaimed Grrrrrrrrrowl. Some members of the audience tried to stop Phoom while some of them contemplated life under the lead of a man who called them fools and spelt his name with a novuple-R. Phoom removed a sword of inexplicable length from his manly trenchcoat. "Prepare to battle, Grrrrrrrrrowl!" "I am already prepared, Phenomelous Marvaleon!" The fact that Grrrrrrrrrowl used Phoom's full name indicates that he is not a friend of Phoom's. Phoom thrust his sword at Grrrrrrrrrowl, but pulled it back at the last minute. It was a feint! Grrrrrrrrrowl collapsed, unconscious. It was a faint! "Noooo!" cried several members of the cross-dressing audience. Some members, however, were stunned by the incredible cool-looking outfit worn by Phoom, and converted to the Good side. They untied Joshua. "However did you know I was here?" asked Joshua. "Simple, Josh," said Phoom. "I *overheard some people talking about it in a bar*!" "Wow!!!!!" quintuple-exclaimed Joshua. "And how did you know my name?" "Simple, Josh," said Phoom. "I *listened in on the ritual murder song before making my grand entrance*!" "Cool," said Joshua. "And why do you answer in such a cool and mysterious manner?" "Simple, Josh," said Phoom. "I *am a cool and mysterious man*!" And with that, Phoom was gone, leaving nothing but a memory. And his sword, which he returned for a few days later. TBC? -- Steffan http://iceduck.pkmn.co.uk Go there now. No, NOW.