From: Rob (robfrompw@yahoo.com)
Subject: [PW!] That's Captain Briney To You!
Newsgroups: alt.games.nintendo.pokemon
Date: 2003-09-19 01:55:30 PST
A short middle-aged man with thinning brown hair stumbles out of
Hoenn's Petalburg Woods, wearing a golden tuxedo that's presently
covered in dirt. Both he and the dirty Torchic perched on his right
shoulder are overjoyed to have finally exited the forest, being that
they've been lost within it for quite a while.
A blond boy standing on a dirt path leading into the Woods gasps when
he catches a glimpse of the traveler and infantile Fire Pokemon that
have just exited the forest. The child, who's dressed in a clean,
elegant navy blue outfit, says, "My word! Not only is your apparel
disgustingly gaudy, it's covered in dirt as well! Have you no shame,
sir?"
"...excuse me?" The middle-aged man squints his eyes, "Do I know you?"
"My name is Winston, and I believe you should get yourself to a
clothing store as soon as possible. I recommend Tropius Republic."
"My name's Marvin, and I believe you should mind your own business."
"Hmmph." Winston crosses his arms and glances away from Marvin, "Very
well, then - I have no need to speak with a commoner like you anyhow.
And to think, I was about to ask you if you needed any assistance in
finding whatever location you are heading towards."
"That would be a great way to apologize for your rude behavior!"
Marvin runs over to where Winston's glancing so as to be in his field
of vision, "I'm looking for a Mr. Briney, do you know where he lives?"
"Indeed I do, but why should I share this information with you?"
Winston literally raises his nose as he closes his eyes, "What can you
do for me? I'm fabulously wealthy - no amount of money will convince
me to..."
"Found it!" Marvin runs past Winston, having spotted a building next
to a small dock a few steps away from the annoying rich kid. Upon
seeing a sign outside the building that reads "Mr. Briney's Cottage",
Marvin smiles, happy that residents of Hoenn are so eager to identify
their homes, and heads through the open doorway leading into the
cottage.
Inside, an old, bald man with a white goatee who's wearing a captain's
hat sits on an orange pillow next to a table. A Wingull is perched on
the old man's left shoulder, much like Marvin's Torchic temporarily
resides on his right shoulder. The elderly seafaring fellow is
studying some maps that are on the table.
"Hello," Marvin says to catch the man's attention, "Are you Mr.
Briney?"
"I'm CAPTAIN Briney," Captain Briney turns his attention to his
current houseguests, "Honorary Captain of the S. S. Tidal and owner of
the beautiful boat docked just outside this cottage. Who wants to
know?"
"Marvin, once-extraordinare magician who's currently considering
trying to become a Pokemon Master after having successfully won a
Stone Badge from Roxanne, the Rustboro Gym Leader." Marvin takes a
deep breath after saying that, "I'm currently looking for a little
girl with black hair named Terri - she stole three of my Pokemon and I
think she might be in Dewford Town. Roxanne told me you might be able
to help me get there."
"What do you think, Peeko?" Captain Briney asks the Wingull perched on
his shoulder, "Should we help Marvin the whatever he said?"
"Pihyo," replies Peeko the white and blue Seagull Pokemon, "Pihyohyo!"
"Wow, that's a very cute..." Marvin has never seen a Wingull before in
his life, so he guesses, "Uhm, Pihyo you have there. That's the cutest
Pihyo I've ever seen, in fact - and I know my Pihyos!"
Captain Briney narrows his eyes, "Peeko's a Wingull."
"Ohh... riiight! Wingull!" Marvin nods, "But of course. So, does that
mean yours has a speech impediment, or do they all say 'pihyo'?"
"Speech impediment?!"
Marvin shakes his head, "Oh, I didn't mean it like that, Mr.
Briney..."
"Captain Briney."
"...I'm just used to Pokemon saying what they are. So I wasn't sure
what was up with your Wingull. Is it that you met him when you were a
little boy and now that he's so incredibly old he's losing the ability
to speak properly? Err, I mean old for a Pokemon... not that you're
old..."
Captain Briney leers at his guest, "You know, you're really starting
to annoy me, Marvin."
Marvin frowns, "Yeah, I get that a lot, especially from pretty
ladies."
Peeko squawks into his Trainer's ear, "Pihyo, pihyo!"
Captain Briney sighs, "Fortunately for you, however, Peeko likes you,
so I'll take you to Dewford Town in my ferry after all. Follow me."
The old man packs up his maps and heads outside his cottage. After
Marvin walks outside, Captain Briney locks his cottage door and climbs
onto his boat. As he prepares his boat for departure, Marvin climbs
onto it as well, careful that his Torchic doesn't fall into the water.
Within minutes, Captain Briney's little boat sets sail for Dewford
Town, its captain sitting across from and glaring at its human
passenger.
-Marvin