From: Rob (robfrompw@yahoo.com) Subject: [PW!] [SC] [R1] The Ghetto Prince Versus The Ice Princess Newsgroups: alt.games.nintendo.pokemon Date: 2003-12-05 00:23:47 PST Robert sits down, holding a big tub of popcorn and an extra large cup of Pepsi, in the section of the Silver Stadium's stands reserved for Gym Leaders, to watch the upcoming match between his former rivals. He takes a long whiff of his popcorn, trying to forget the terrible stench the great white Magikarp released in the match that followed the one he won. In the time it took Robert to buy his concessions, which he's currently commencing to consume, both Trainers about to battle in Match 7 of the Silver Conference have taken their places on the field and a Water Field with two round white platforms is rising up from underneath the Stadium. The Stadium's announcer says, "Now that the Water Field has been brought up to the surface, the Red Trainer, Barbara of Saffron City, will decide which Pokemon she wants to send out first against the Green Trainer, Rapper P-Masta J of Viridian City. This could give her the advantage!" "Pssht, naw it won't," predicts P-Masta J, the male Trainer with blond dreadlocks who's wearing dark blue sunglasses, a white undershirt, tan baggy pants, and gold-plated white sneakers. "She ain't gonna win." "You do not know that. No human being save my teacher Sabrina is capable of knowing what the outcome of this match will be." retorts Barbara, the female Trainer with long blue hair and sage green eyes who's wearing a sleeveless pink dress and black flip-flops. "Even so, I think I shall emerge victorious." P-Masta J smirks in disbelief, "How much ya wantsta make a bet?" "Ugh," Barbara winces when P-Masta J makes his proposition, "You display such an utter disregard for proper usage of the English language, that which separates us humans from most Pokemon. However, I might consider making a wager with you, provided that I approve of the punishment you propose to inflict on me if I were to lose this match and that if I win this match, you will promise to never speak with me again." "For reals?" P-Masta J doesn't think twice about what he wants before he tells Barbara, "Yo, if I beat yo' ass, you gotsta go on a date with me an' actually listen to what I gotsta say. I promise I won't get all up in yo' grill. I jus' wantsta talk ova' some gin n' juice, a'ight?" "That sounds fair. Very well - I agree with the terms of your wager. Now let's commence our battle." Barbara pulls a Pokeball out of a pocket on her dress and says, "You will be familiar with the first Pokemon I shall be using today, Jeremy, but both she and I have become much more skilled in battling since you last saw her. Any weaknesses of hers that you might remember have most likely been overcome." She pushes the button on the Pokeball in her hand and a tall, slender Jynx materializes on the large white platform on Barbara's side of the Water Field. "Word! I wuz thinkin' you wuz gonna pull that old Jynx on me, foo', so I came packin' whut I needs to lay tha smack-down on her." P-Masta J withdraws an Ultra Ball from within his baggy pants and pushes the button on it. A rather large Steelix emerges on the large white platform on P-Masta J's side of the battlefield, careful not to fall in the pool. Barbara commands, "Jynx, Blizzard!" P-Masta J grins when he calls out, "Steelix, it be Crunch time!" While the Blizzard attack that rains down on P-Masta J's Steelix would have hurt him considerably when his armor was made of Rock, since his armor is made of Steel now, much of the snow slides off his body and smaller pieces of hail harmlessly bounce off him. After the Blizzard subsides, the Steelix leans forward towards Barbara's Jynx and Crunches her in-between his giant jaws! The powerful Dark attack causes the Psychic Pokemon to faint in just one chomp. The Steelix spits Barbara's limp Jynx into the pool, where not even the cold water wakes her up. When Barbara's Jynx doesn't swim up to the surface, a bald referee on the sidelines lifts a green flag towards P-Masta J and declares, "Jynx is unable to battle. Steelix is the winner!" Barbara recalls the Jynx, disappointed by how quickly her Pokemon was defeated, especially after the speech she gave earlier claiming the Pokemon had overcome past weaknesses. "While Ice does not work considerably well on Steel Pokemon, even if they are part Ground, I do know that Fighting Pokemon can break through Steel armour." She withdraws another Pokeball and pushes the button on it, saying, "Meditite, I summon you!" A small Pokemon with a tan head but blue arms and legs appears, hovering over the Water Field with his legs crossed. Hoping the Meditite her psychic cousin, Tate of the Mossdeep City Gym, gave her will be able to defeat P-Masta J's Steelix, Barbara commands, "Knock that Steelix into the water with a Hi Jump Kick, Meditite!" P-masta J raises an eyebrow when the Meditite floats over towards his Steelix, "That be whack, yo - how come a Fightin' P-mon be flyin'?" As if to answer his question, the announcer explains, "Barbara has sent out a Pokemon from the Hoenn region to combat P-Masta J's impressive Steelix. Meditite is a Fighting Pokemon with Psychic Pokemon traits - this is why he's able to telekinetically hover over the field!" "Thanks for tha 411, guy," P-Masta J says out loud before telling his Steelix, "It be Crunch time again, Steelix!" Though appearing calm and reserved since the moment he was released, Barbara's Meditite abruptly snaps out of his trance, extending all four of his limbs outwards, and quickly Hi Jump Kicks the massive head of P-Masta J's Steelix, who wobbles unsteadily on his white platform. Trying to maintain his balance, P-Masta J's Steelix latches on to Barbara's Meditite's legs, Crunching them with his jaws, before he topples into the pool. The subsequent splash soaks both P-Masta J and Barbara and some of the water even reaches as high as the Gym Leader section of the Stadium, where Robert moans when his popcorn gets wet. P-Masta J, Barbara, the referee, Robert, and just about everyone else in the audience watch the pool, wondering if either of the two Pokemon will be able to emerge from its depths. After about thirty seconds, Barbara's Meditite floats out of the pool, legs crossed, sporting a serene look. "Steelix is unable to battle," the referee announces, pointing his red flag at Barbara, "Meditite is the winner!" "What tha hell?!" P-Masta J asks, pointing his Pokeball at the pool so a red beam pulls his Steelix back into it, "That foo' be a Psychic P-mon, how come Crunch didn't work?" "The same reason my Jynx's Blizzard did not knock out your Steelix," Barbara explains, "His Fighting traits negate his weakness to Dark attacks." "Whateva'. No biggie - you won't be able to beat my next P-mon." P-Masta J pulls another Pokeball out of one of the many pockets on his baggy pants and pushes the button on it, releasing a Dragonite that flaps his wings to stay afloat over the Water Field. "Dragonite, Hyper Beam!" Barbara cries out, "Meditite, Hidden Power!" But no one in the audience that day is able to find out what Power is Hidden within Barbara's Meditite since the Hyper Beam P-Masta J's Dragonite shoots out of his mouth hits the meditating Pokemon right in his tan head! Meditite's limp body starts falling towards the pool. Knowing he's been knocked unconscious by the Hyper Beam, Barbara pulls her Pokemon back into his Pokeball before he lands in the water. "Meditite is unable to battle," says the bald referee as he points a green flag at P-Masta J, "Dragonite is the winner!" "You may have defeated my Meditite, but you have made quite a mistake. You really should not have sent a Dragon Pokemon to face a person who trains Ice Pokemon," Barbara puts away her Meditite's Pokeball and withdraws a green Net Ball with black designs on it. "Go, Sealeo!" She tosses the Net Ball into the pool and a large blue Sealeo crawls out of the water, onto the white platform on Barbara's side of the Water Field. "Pssht. If Sealeo be anythin' like Seel, we be done here." P-Masta J calls out to his Dragonite, "T-bolt his fat ass, Dragonite!" Barbara's voice doesn't waver as she shouts, "Sealeo, Sheer Cold!" The bolts of electricity that shoot out of Dragonite's antennae coalesce into a Thunderbolt that sizzles Sealeo's Thick Fat! The attack seriously weakens but doesn't knock out the resilient Sealeo. The Sealeo blows a cloud of subzero coldness in the direction of P-Masta J's Dragonite. After the cloud envelopes the Dragonite, it hardens into a block of solid ice that freezes the blood flowing through the Dragon's veins, rendering him unable to battle as the block of ice falls into the water. "Dragonite is unable to battle," the referee announces, lifting his red flag towards Barbara. He's as surprised as many people in the audience that the Dragonite has been defeated in one hit, "Sealeo is the winner!" The announcer explains what has just happened, "Sealeo's Sheer Cold is a One-Hit-KO move. It seems Dragonite might have been more susceptible than most Pokemon, being weak to Ice attacks in general." "A'ight, s'okay, s'okay..." P-Masta J consoles himself as he recalls his Dragonsicle and produces another Pokeball from within his baggy pants, "Dragonite got one T-bolt in, now all I gotsta do is finish it off." He pitches the Pokeball onto the white platform nearest to Barbara and a Machamp wearing a P-1 Grand Prix Championship Belt appears next to Sealeo, "Yo, 'Champ, one Low Kick oughta end this thing. Do yo' thing!" "One Low Kick will most certainly not finish this, Jeremy. I have a date to prevent!" Barbara comments, then she orders, "Sealeo, Rest!" The second that Barbara's Sealeo shuts his eyes and starts to Rest, his body glows. When the glow subsides, all his wounds are healed and it's as if he hasn't been attacked at all. When P-Masta J's Machamp Low Kicks the healthy Sealeo, the kick wakes him up instead of knocking him out. "This has gotsta end," P-Masta J calls out, "'Champ, Submission!" "I concur - this does indeed have to end. Allow me to finish it," says Barbara, "Sealeo, freeze that Machamp with Blizzard!" The Blizzard that Barbara's Sealeo summons manages to slow down P-Masta J's Machamp, who finds it more difficult to get a grip on the slippery Sealeo when snow and hail is crashing into his body at full force. He does manage to eventually hug the Sealeo with all four of his arms, however. When he does so, he leaps up high into the air, despite the snow and ice, spins once in mid-air, then starts falling back towards the white platform beneath him, the Sealeo positioned to break his fall! When the Blizzard attack is over, P-Masta J's Machamp is cold, but he's not frozen. When he rolls off Sealeo's body, it's revealed to everyone that Barbara's part-Water part-Ice Pokemon is unconscious. The victorious Machamp gets on his feet and raises his four arms high! "Sealeo is unable to battle," the bald referee decrees, as he waves his green flag at P-Masta J, "Machamp and his Trainer, P-Masta J, win the match!" Many people in the crowd cheer for P-Masta J! There are quite a few fans of his rap songs in the audience. Robert also applauds for P-Masta J, despite never having heard one of his rap songs, and wonders if he's going to have to battle him in Round Two of the Silver Conference. Having won the match, P-Masta J recalls his Machamp into his Pokeball and saunters over to where Barbara is standing, saying, "You owe me a date now, girl. When d'ya wantsta meet me at the PC, Bambi?" "Get away from me," Barbara pulls her Net Ball out of the pool and sucks her Sealeo into it, "I... To be honest, I never want to meet you at the Pokemon Center. I didn't truly think I could lose to you. I have gotten used to the dynamics of this world we live in, where righteous people almost always prevail in the end and villains get blasted into the stratosphere each time they attempt to create some kind of mayhem." "I'm not a villain, foo'." P-Masta J steps closer towards Barbara as she nervously takes a step back, "Just 'cuz sometimes in my songs I says I'm 'chillin' like a villain' don't mean I'm a villain for reals. I expect you ta keep yo' promise, Bambi. I wantsta have lunch wit' you at tha PC." He takes two more steps forward to shake Barbara's hand. "Security!" Barbara cries out, scared of the man who used to stalk her. When a Pokemon League official emerges from an opening near the entrance to the Red Trainer's waiting room and grabs P-Masta J's arm, P-Masta J pulls away from the guard and complains, "Get yo' mitts offa me, guy. I can tells when I'm not wanted. Now lemme dip like a true pimp." That said, P-Masta J puts his hands in his pockets and swaggers off the field in style, leaving the field through the Red Trainer's exit, followed by the Pokemon League official who doesn't trust the rapper to behave. Concerned that she might run into P-Masta J if she walks through the Red Trainer's exit, Barbara traverses the field as the Water Field slowly sinks back into storage and exits through the Green Trainer's exit. Meanwhile, Robert is rather disappointed that his popcorn got wet, so he walks to the nearest concessions stand while the field is being cleaned up to get a new tub of popcorn and a hot dog, hoping to eat them in peace during the final match of the Silver Conference's First Round. -Robert