From: "Amber" <kitsunenoasobi@hotmail.com> Subject: [PW!] A Musical Interlude Date: Tuesday, August 03, 2004 2:55 AM >The doors swung open then, and snooty looking man in a tuxedo and >white gloves stepped out, looking down his nose at them, like a person >looking at a pokémon they don't particularly like, but need at that >moment. > >"Master Bard? We've been expecting you. If I may escort you off the >main balcony and to the main foyer..." The tall penguin walked off >and, with barely a glance of surprise at each other, Jason and Rivet >followed. Meanwhile... Amber had, in nearly no time at all, found Landal's Tux & Bridal. She pushed open the swinging glass door and heard the little bell ring above her. "Hello?" she called, glancing around at the dresses and shouldering her bag selfconciously. She quickly glanced in the multi-faceted mirror in the corner to make sure she wasn't exposing her Sneasel side. "Helloooo!" a very enthusiastic, slightly-male voice piped from behind the curtain. "Uh...hi," she said, turning to the curtain and grinning nervously. "I'm here--" "To find a dress, I'm SURE!" the flamboyant voice said, a slim hand with painted nails sliding out of the curtain to grab one of the hoop-skirts out of a pile next to the dressing room. "Well..yeah and a tux...y'see I have--" "A party?" There was some shuffling from behind the curtain and it suddenly flung open. "I have JUST the thing!!" Before her was...well she wasn't sure what it was, woman or man. Before her was a human, in a ta-da! pose, displaying a very ruffled, fluffy yellow dress, with bows and lace draped everywhere. Its hair was up in golden curls atop its head, it had blaringly pink lipstick plastered on its lips, and yellow eyeshadow emanating in wings from its eyes. It lifted the skirt delicately and slid down to the floor in a graceful fluid movement. Approaching Amber, it held out that same slim hand with painted nails. "Hello, darling, I'm Landal, the owner of this fanTABULOUS dress shop!" Ah. Landal. So it must be...a man. Smiling in what she hoped was a reassuring and amicable way, Amber took Landal's hand and shook it. "Nice to meet you, Landal; I'm Amber." "Oh what a gorgeous name. I always wanted to name my daughter after a jewel, but you know, Opal is so...RUSTIC." He laughed...or no...he giggled. "But you know, it's sort of hard to have a daughter when you're like me!" He giggled again, fanning his face with that painted hand. "Ah...I'm sure." After a short and uncomfortable pause, Amber continued, "You said you had 'just the thing?'" "Oh YES. It just came in today" --he held out the 'day', his voice sliding up a note--"and it's such a wonderful dress." After another short pause, he laughed again. "Oh! You must be wondering why I'm wearing this." He gestured to the frilly yellow dress. "I make many of these dresses custom. I like to make sure the measurements are alright." "Is it ok for...for a man to be checking the measurements on a woman's dress that way?" She cocked an eyebrow. Landal stared at her for a moment. "This isn't a woman's dress, darling. That's another section of the store." He stared at her a moment longer and she held his gaze, afraid she'd offended the kindly flamboyant man. But he laughed again and took her hand. "We're headed that way now! Ah ha haaaah!" He whisked around the shop, swiftly taking a dress from the rack here, there, one over there. He pressed a pile of them into her arms and then pushed her towards the curtain. "Go try those on, darling." She looked at the dresses uncertainly and then at him, after which he laughed again and said "Oh don't worry -- I won't peek!" ((You know, I'm imagining Nathan Lane from Birdcage here...)) She climbed into the dressing room and swiftly went through each dress he'd handed her. She had to admit, he had impeccable taste, and each fit to a tee. She had difficulty deciding between two of them and peeked out of the curtain. "Um...Landal?" "Oh yes, dear? Have you decided?" "Um, not quite. I'm having difficulty deciding between two of them." "Well let's see them." She opened the curtain, revealing the first one: a long blue dress with loops of fabric along the bottom. He looked at her for a long moment. "The blue really brings out the red in your hair," he hemmed, "and the gold in your eyes. But darling, you have a SERIOUS PROBLEM." Alarmed, Amber looked down. "What is it??" "Your posture is a-TROCIOUS!" He bustled across the room, and brought her shoulders back, pushing her lower back out a bit. "Just remember, when in doubt, breasts out!" ((This is actual advice given to me by a dress-store owner -- except she was a small chinese lady with a heavy accent, instead of a flamboyantly gay man who looks like Nathan Lane in my mind XD)) "Ah...thanks..." Amber murmured, admiring herself in the mirror. He smiled. "Very pretty. You should count yourself LUCKY with a bod like that, eh?" He giggled. "Now what's the other one?" She closed the curtain, and picked out the other one from the rack. She slipped it on and opened the curtain. "This one." She looked at herself in the mirror, trying to bring her shoulders back. "Hmm...you're still having trouble. Here's another trick. Put your hands on your shoulders like this" -- He demonstrated by placing his hands on their shoulders -- "and your shoulders automatically go back." ((Also a bit of advice given to me, this time by my very short friend.)) "Ah thanks." She stood up straight and admired the pearly-pink dress. It was very simple and elegant. "Honey, I think you'd best go with the blue one. This one makes your skin look so pale!" She nodded, accepted. Closed the curtain, changed into her regular clothes, paid for the dress. Then it was time for a tux. She told him his measurements, and although he protested his hatred for choosing a tux without being able to tell if it would lay right on the man, Landal chose one for her based off her description of him. She paid for that too, and thanked Landal profusely. As she left, he winked and repeated, "When in doubt, breasts out!" And so she set out for her grandmother's mansion. TBC Wow, that was....longer than it needed to be >.>;; >Ummm...shoot me now? Because I obviously have no place in fiction if >it takes me this long to get around to writing one crappy short >story. >>_< I don't deserve to write! *commits seppuku with a pencil* > >--Marco262, the suicidal, ashamed ferret Oh shut up Ryan :) *hugs the ferret* No committing Seppuku while I'm on watch.