From: "Rob"
Subject: [PW!] Anecdotes About Arduous Adventures And Absurd Antics Aren't Actually Awesome, After All.
Date: Tuesday, June 01, 2004 4:54 AM
A middle-aged man named Marvin, once a quasi-popular magician in Goldenrod
City but currently a fugitive in Hoenn, finds himself sitting uncomfortably
in a rustic cottage on Route 111. For the past few days, the tuxedo-clad man
sporting brown hair with silver linings has considered himself a hostage to
two kids, and today he finds himself hostage to a very old woman. All three
individuals that Marvin believes are keeping him from progressing in his
life are presently sitting with him at a table in the old lady's home,
talking amongst themselves. A fairy from another world is flying around the
room too, but no one pays much attention to the fairy.
Marvin, who really isn't interested in the conversation the three other
people at the table are having, scratches the back of his head. He feels a
little strange. It's as if he's being watched. He's felt this way before in
his life, but he hasn't felt this way for days now, during all the
adventures he's been having with Lynkeru, Mamoru, and Indi the ignored
fairy.
Marvin doesn't feel too comfortable with these odd characters, but he
doesn't have any other way to track Terri, the little girl who stole his
Shiny Unown, than by using the Shiny Unown Radar programmed into Lynkeru's
Pokegear. If it weren't for the Pokegear, he wouldn't have noticed that
Terri made a wrong turn at Mount Chimney, taking the Fiery Path instead of
the Cable Car to Lavaridge Town. He would be in Lavaridge Town right now,
provided he could find it using his Pokenav alone, waiting for Terri to
arrive at the Gym there...
Now that he thinks about it, Marvin decides that such a fate would have been
better than the one he has to suffer through now. He could have been
spending time with the beautiful red-haired Gym Leader who works there, and
he could have been calling Professor Birch's Lab every day using her
videophone to check up on his beloved Ditto. The Old Lady's Rest Stop
doesn't have a telephone or a computer for him to use, and Marvin's not
aware that Lynkeru's Pokegear has a cell phone feature since the Gerudo
youth only uses it as a Shiny Unown Radar.
Despite the lack of amenities in the old woman's house, Lynkeru has been
agreeing to stay there for a while longer every time the old woman tells
them to. Marvin's annoyed that the woman keeps pestering them and that
Lynkeru keeps being so polite despite the fact that the woman is clearly a
senile weirdo, but who's he to argue with a girl who can pull two sabre
swords out of thin air at any moment and slice him to pieces? It's not like
he can put himself back together if Lynkeru cuts him up. As a magician, he's
only good at putting back together the assistants he cuts up himself.
"You sure have been quiet, Marvin," Lynkeru points out. "Don't you have
anything to contribute to the conversation?"
Marvin replies, "I was trying out a new style."
"Huh?"
"I was trying to have a conversation without using dialogue."
"Why?"
"It seemed innovative. Everyone talks all the time. I wanted to do something
different."
"But talking's important."
"I guess..."
"Why don't you tell her about the adventures we had in the Fiery Path?"
"Hmm... you know what, Lynkeru? I think I will."
"I'm not Lynkeru. I'm Mamoru."
"Really? You two sound alike."
"I don't sound like her! I'm a guy... usually!"
"Uhhh..."
"Mamoru just sounds like me because we spend a lot of time together."
Marvin sighs. He has a feeling that Lynkeru is starting to rub off on him
too, but he can't quite put his finger on how. He seems to be losing focus
on his quest to get his Shiny Unown back. Even as they converse with the
senile woman, Terri is getting farther and farther away from them.
Lynkeru asks, "Well?"
"Well what?"
"Didn't you say you were going to tell the nice lady who was kind enough to
let us sleep here about the arduous adventures we had in the Fiery Path?"
"Yes," the old lady comments from her seat across from Marvin, putting her
chin on her hands, "That's a fine idea. You should do that. That's right.
Take your time and tell me ALL about your antics! I don't get out much and I
love hearing about the adventures of people who stay at my rest stop!"
"Okay... then..." Marvin clears his throat then begins his tale, "Shortly
after we entered the Fiery Path, we encountered Conan - a talking,
pipe-smoking Camerupt wearing a Sherlock Holmes hat who wanted us to solve
'The Mystery of the Missing Slugma'. Lynkeru thought it would be a good idea
to help the Camerupt detective, so we did. We scoured the Fiery Path,
looking for clues, when we noticed part of the cave had caved in.
Fortunately, around that time a Ho-Oh happened to be flying through the
cave. I have no idea what a legendary Pokemon from Johto was doing in the
Fiery Path, but he showed up, melted all the rocks, and flew away. He seemed
to get along really well with Lynkeru, for some reason. Anyway, after that
we went deeper into the cave and found out that a herd of Torkoal were
keeping the Slugma as prisoners. Conan told us that the Torkoal believed
Slugma were inferior because they didn't have rock hard shells, and that
they were trying to force the Slugma to wear rocks on their backs."
The old lady interrupts to ask, "But don't Slugma evolve into Magcargo, who
do have rock hard shells?"
"That's right! I didn't know that, but Mamoru did, so we ended up saving the
day by convincing the Torkoal to let the Slugma go free so they could gain
experience in order to evolve and grow rock shells. After that, we decided
to camp out in the Fiery Path. Overnight, an organization called Team Magma
showed up to look for something. One of the members, a mean woman named
Jill, took Lynkeru's fairy hostage while we slept. After we had breakfast,
we noticed Indi was missing, so we once again looked all around the cave for
her. Fortunately, Lynkeru was able to hear her complaining, so we followed
the noise to a Secret Base. My Octillery and Mamoru's Pokemon ended up
helping us save the day. We rescued Indi and headed back towards the exit of
the Fiery Path..."
"Oh my, it must've been scary to encounter Team Magma!"
"I was scared, yes, but Lynkeru and Mamoru didn't seem too frightened. Like
I was saying, on our way to the exit, we encountered a mean biker girl
called Roxie. She sent out her Pokemon to battle us when she found out that
Lynkeru had a Shiny Unown, and both her Totodile and Koffing wound up
evolving during the match! It was quite a sight to see her Koffing merge
with one of the Koffing in the Fiery Path to become a Weezing! It seemed
like all was lost when her Croconaw and Weezing defeated most of my Pokemon
and those of Mamoru, but Lynkeru pulled a couple of 'Deku' nuts out of thin
air and paralyzed both of the Pokemon. Lynkeru sent out her Shiny Unown to
freeze Roxie in place, then we ran out of the Fiery Path and kept running
until we found this rest stop!"
"Geeze, Marvin," Lynkeru shakes her head at the middle-aged man's
descriptions of what happened in the Fiery Path, "You're not a very good
story-teller. I mean, yeah, you told us the gist of what happened, but a lot
was missing. How can you just skip right over important details like that?
You should've seen my friend Yolei tell her sister about the stand-off we
had in Mahogany Town against the Masked Rocket. Now THAT was story-telling!
Then again, what happened in Mahogany Town was really important to her, so
of course she'd talk about in great detail. She decided to retire from her
Pokemon Journey right after it happened, after all."
"Oh dear, dears," the old woman says, addressing both Marvin and Mamoru,
"Aren't your Pokemon exhausted after having battled that biker girl's
Pokemon? If you'd like, rest up here a while longer. That's a fine idea! You
should do that."
"I think that..." starts Marvin, but Lynkeru interrupts by saying, "She's
right - we've been resting here for a while, but you two haven't let out
your Pokemon to have them rest too. You should let out your Pokemon, then
all of us can take a nice, long refreshing nap before heading west to..."
Lynkeru looks down at her Pokegear to see where Terri's four Shiny Unown are
currently at, "Fallarbor Town. I'm sure Terri will still be there in the
morning, so there's no reason for us to hurry."
"That's right!" the old woman exclaims, happy that her visitors want to stay
at her rest stop overnight, "Take your time and rest up!"
"You all can go on ahead and start resting without me," Marvin says, gazing
at the nearby door leading into the woman's bathroom, "I need to use the
bathroom." As the old lady leads Lynkeru, Mamoru, and Indi upstairs towards
her guest bedroom, Marvin heads into the rest stop's lavatory. "Yeah, I need
to use the bathroom, all right," he says to himself after closing the
bathroom door, "...use the bathroom to escape! If I wait for morning to
leave this rest stop, Terri will be long gone from the town she's in now. I
need to get a head start." Marvin opens the bathroom's window and squeezes
through the frame to his freedom.
Once outside, Marvin starts jogging briskly towards the west. The chubby man
starts sweating profusely and breathing heavily after only a few minutes of
running, despite the sun not being out. This heavy breathing proves to be
quite problematic when he arrives in Route 113 and gray ash starts showering
down from Mount Chimney, the volcano just south of the route. Marvin doubles
up and starts coughing, unable to keep running when the ash falls in his
eyes and gets sucked into his mouth. A couple of Spinda giggle at the
middle-aged man's misfortune from a distance, their swirling eyes used to
the ash that's raining down from above.
"Exegg," Marvin coughs, reaching into his tuxedo coat to withdraw a Safari
Ball, "Exeggutor... help... help me out." After pulling out his Safari Ball,
he pushes the button on it and tells the Palm Tree Pokemon that
materializes, "Use... Reflect... over us." A majority of the four coconut
heads agree to help Marvin - two because they're loyal to him and a third
because he doesn't like the ash. The fourth coconut head, the one who hates
Marvin for forcing him to evolve, simply glares at his Trainer as the other
heads create an invisible barrier above their heads that Reflects the
falling ash. Marvin hugs his Exeggutor, partly because he's happy that the
coconut heads agreed to help him, but mainly so that he's better shielded
from the falling ash by the invisible Reflecting umbrella above the
Exeggutor.
"Westward... march," Marvin commands, hoping to reach Fallarbor Town before
morning with the help of his Exeggutor. As Marvin and his Pokemon go west,
the middle-aged man hopes that Lynkeru doesn't mind that he's gone on ahead
without her, especially since she's so skilled with her swords.
-Marvin (( NS: Tech, it's been over a month since your last Lynkeru post. I
want to make Marvin posts with more frequency, which is why I'm having him
leave Lynkeru behind. As for the stories of what happened in the Fiery Path,
I didn't want to simply lose a month of Marvin stories. If you don't like
anything of what happened, just imagine it didn't happen and rack up the
discrepancy to Marvin's poor story-telling abilities. ))