From:
Subject: [PW!] Against All Odds (the whole shebang)
Date: Sunday, May 16, 1999 3:52 PM
Before I start this story, let me say: Kain Abel (and all your
fraudulent alter-egos), don't bother reading past this paragraph. The
vocabulary words utilized in this story are much too large for your
laughably pitiful intellect to comprehend. Now, on with the long
story...
--AGAINST ALL ODDS--
Part 1
by Karnivax
"We're here. Cinnabar Island Gym," announced the lanky trainer
to his vaguely dinosaurian insect associate.
"Yecch! This place is a filthy slag-pit. It's no wonder so few
trainers challenge Blaine, what with this stomach-churning decor," the
aforementioned associate remarked.
"Quit your whinin', Torrasque. If anything, you should be getting
yourself properly motivated. You're going to win me a Volcanobadge."
The saurian suddenly had a look of utter disbelief on its
face. "You're sending *me* to challenge Blaine? Have you taken leave
of your senses?" The creature pointed one scythe-like blade at its
trainer. "Kyle, Blaine trains fire Pokémon. And you know very well
that I'm pyrophobic."
"Torrasque, I've been training you for six years. You'll do fine."
"I'm an intellectual, not a barbarian!" the diminuitive creature
shrieked. "Fighting just wastes time that I could be using to further
advance my superior intellect..."
The trainer scowled. "It's so hard to find good help these days."
"What about that Dragonite of yours? Doesn't he have a water
attack? He should take this one," the insect/reptile hybrid suggested.
"Not this time," the teenage trainer replied. "I want to gauge
just how well I've trained you, Torrasque. And what better way to do
that than to put you in a battle in which you're at a clear
disadvantage?"
There was a brief pause. "You're totally mad!" the creature
snapped. "You're going to get me killed!"
"Trust me, Torrasque. Those big bad fire Pokémon will be no match
for your slash attack."
"That remains to be seen, Kyle..."
The two wandered down a long, dark hallway to a giant arena in the
middle of the Cinnabar Island gym, an arena that was roughly the size
of a hockey rink. The walls and ceiling were painted in many different
shades of red, and the floor tiles were orange and yellow, blackened in
various points by burn marks. Painted lines on the tile formed a
tennis court-like rectangle - the grounds on which the Pokémon would
battle - in the middle of the arena. The battleground was surrounded
by bleachers that were totally empty.
Or at least mostly empty. On the far side of the arena, sleeping
in the nosebleed section of the bleachers, was a balding man who
appeared to be in his late fifties. He was wearing a dirty uniform
that gave him the appearance of a mad scientist.
"There's Blaine," the trainer pointed out.
"My, he must lead an interesting life. Look at him! He's asleep
in his own filth," the reptilian Pokémon commented.
"Gym Leader Blaine!" the trainer yelled out. "I'm Kyle Richter,
of Cinnabar Island. I've come to challenge you for a Volcanobadge!"
The old man woke up and arose from the bleachers. He wandered
slowly down to the battleground, and clearly visible underneath his lab
coat was a leather belt laden with Pokéballs.
"Finally, some action," Blaine said in a dry voice. "Things were
gettin' downright boring around here." Blaine removed one Pokéball
from his belt. "Okay, kid, here're the rules," he said to Kyle, a
confident glare in his eye. "We each choose one Pokémon and set them
against each other. Your Pokémon wins, I fork over a Volcanobadge, and
you're one step closer to the Elite Four. My Pokémon wins, you get
zilch, and you go home with your tail between your legs. Got it?"
"Got it," Kyle answered.
"'Kay then," Blaine snorted. "I choose Rapidash!" Blaine tossed
the Pokéball into center court, and the fiery unicorn that was Rapidash
was unleashed.
"I choose Scyther!" Kyle shouted. "Get 'im, Torrasque!" Kyle's
dinosaurian Pokémon reluctantly sauntered into the court, its head
lowered.
Blaine took one look at the Scyther and started laughing
contemptuously. "Heh heh heh! You're sending a bug to fight a fire
Pokémon? I smell a novice..."
Kyle gritted his teeth. "We'll see about that, y'old fossil..."
--AGAINST ALL ODDS--
Part 2
by Karnivax
"Rapidash! Give him your Stomp attack!" shouted Blaine as the
Pokémon battle commenced. Before Torrasque could make a move, Rapidash
charged, reared back, and kicked Torrasque with its forehooves.
Torrasque reeled backwards and fell over.
"The hurting...the hurting..." Torrasque groaned, staring up at
the ceiling.
"You're such a hypochondriac," Kyle snapped. "Get up and hit that
flamin' glue-bottle candidate with a Quick Attack."
Torrasque righted himself and, in a burst of blinding speed,
leaped over Rapidash with the intent to kick him in the back. Rapidash
merely booted Torrasque in the head with its hind feet, and Torrasque
went flying over to where Blaine stood, landing on his stomach.
"Give 'im another Stomp," Blaine ordered. Rapidash leaped into
the air and came down right on Torrasque's back. Torrasque writhed in
pain and rolled around on the floor until Rapidash fell away.
"Swords Dance, Torrasque!" shouted Kyle. Torrasque got to his
feet and unleashed a heavy sigh.
"This is so humiliating," Torrasque commented. He started wildly
flailing his limbs and spinning around in circles. "Bippity boppity
boo. I'm doing a Swords Dance," he grunted dryly. Kyle smacked one
hand against his own forehead.
"Just use your Slash attack," Kyle snorted in an exasperated tone.
Torrasque charged toward Rapidash at full speed, shrieking like a
mad denizen of Jurassic Park, then brought one claw back and swung it
forward, cutting a wide swath. The hit connected with its target, and
hit with surprising force. Rapidash flipped head over hooves upon
contact, landing on his back.
"Huh? It actually works?" Torrasque noted. "Hey, it actually
*works*! Ha hah!" As soon as Rapidash turned over on to its stomach
and got back up, Torrasque hit him with another Slash attack, sending
him right back to the floor.
Torrasque proceeded to do a frenetic little victory dance,
pointing at Rapidash and laughing, "Hah! You thought you could lock
horns with the Great One? You're nothin' but a rooty-poo piece o'
trailer park trash!"
_I'm never lending him the television again on Saturday night,_
Kyle thought, shaking his head at the ridiculous spectacle.
Torrasque, eyes closed, continued his victory dance. "The
Torrasque says, you better shut yer mouth and know yer ro-" He never
got to finish his sentence. A fuming Rapidash kicked him in the back.
"I'm through toying with you!" Blaine growled. "Rapidash, Ember
attack!" Rapidash swung its burning tail, and a fireball flew towards
Torrasque.
"AIIIEEE! HOT!" Torrasque cried, and leaped away. Rapidash
rifled off another fireball and scored a direct hit. A burned Scyther
crashed to the ground about two feet in front of his trainer.
"You're doing great!" Kyle said to Torrasque.
"That jabroni just checked in to the Smack Down Hotel..."
Torrasque moaned, his consciousness dwindling.
"Umm...yeah," said Kyle. "C'mon, one more Slash and you can
take 'im down. I'm sure of it."
Torrasque got to his feet. He lunged at Rapidash faster than the
human eye could see and slashed him with both scythes simultaneously.
Rapidash didn't budge.
"Rapidash! Finish him off with Fire Spin!" Blaine called out.
But nothing happened. Ten seconds later, an unconscious Rapidash
keeled over and hit the floor. There was an unsettling period of
silence.
Blaine sighed deeply. "Rapidash, return." The unicorn
disappeared in a flash of light and returned to Blaine's
Pokéball. "All right, kid, y'won. Here's your badge." Blaine reached
into a pocket of his lab coat and removed a Volcanobadge, then tossed
it to Kyle. Blaine then returned to his seat in the bleachers. "I'm
gettin' too old for this," he grunted to himself. "Why couldn't my
life have been saved by some ice-bird? Maybe if I'd chosen to master
ice Pokémon I wouldn't be gettin' whooped all the time..." Then he
drifted off to sleep.
"All right!" Kyle said, holding the badge in the air
triumphantly. "You won me a Volcanobadge, Torrasque. I knew you had
it in you." Kyle put the badge in the pocket of his denim jacket.
There was a brief pause. Kyle idly swatted a gnat. "So, umm...what do
you wanna do now?"
Torrasque pointed one blade skyward. "Same thing we do every
night, Pinky. Take me to the emergency room." He then fell over face-
first.
"Maybe I didn't train you as well as I thought," Kyle remarked.
He slung Torrasque over his shoulder and started to head for the gym
exit, smiling as he thought about the all-important bragging rights he
now had.
And that's all, folks...long post, I know...
-Karnivax
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