From: Roberto Perez-Vila
Subject: [PW!] Late Birds Miss the Caterpie (Whew!)
Date: Thursday, May 27, 1999 8:35 PM
Robert and Mithril-rama cautiously work their way into the canopy of
trees that is the Viridian Forest. The sun is almost directly above the
forest, since it is noon time, and its rays of light pour through the
canopy in patches, which dance around on the fertile soil that makes up
the natural floor of the area.
Everything remains tranquil, and the re-united friends are enjoying the
silence... That is, until a low rumbling is heard. The noise amplifies
until a flood of green is seen approaching from the west in the
distance. It is a swarm of Caterpie. The moment Robert notices, he leaps
into the bushes, tugging Mithril-rama in with him, since they are linked
by their hands!
The wave of Caterpie gushes into the area, then makes a sharp turn
northward towards Pewter City. Robert blinks when he sees a rather
frightened Persian riding on a purple surfboard on top of the green wave
of Bug Pokemon. Once the chirping of Caterpie dies down, Robert walks
out of the bushes with Rilli.
"That was weird." Robert furrows his brow and stares at the wave in the
distance flowing northward.
Mithril-rama indifferently shrugs at the observation, "We've seen
weirder."
"Yeah... I know. We. That's the whole point. Usually, the strange stuff
happens to us." Robert explains his theory, gesturing the whole time,
"That wave of Caterpie didn't even hit us. It just passed by, ignoring
us completely. In fact, its as if it's part of someone else's
adventure... and not ours. But who's? I mean, there must be a reason why
there was a Persian on a surf board. It *had* to have been someone
else's adventure. Yet, it would seem ironic that I would not be the one
to be attacked by a swarm of Caterpie, what with my fear of bugs and
such."
"Um..." Mithril-rama makes a face, trying to figure out what he is
rambling, "I guess I see what you mean."
"Well, still, it's just a little strange. I mean, how can... we... do...
the... oh my..." Robert's stare becomes blank as he spots a Caterpie
crawling out of the bushes, "Now this is more like it! ...Wait, I mean,
AHHHHHH!"
Mithril-rama turns her attention to the Caterpie that Robert had just
spotted, "Want me to take care of it?"
"No." Robert places his hand on his fourth Pokeball, "While you were
away, Farfetch'd lost a battle against Jeremy's Parasect. I've realized
that I've gotten away from my goal of evolving him. He needs experience
to evolve, and I just haven't been giving him any lately. Flying beats
Bug. I'll take care of this one!"
Mithril-rama smiles and pats him on the back, "That's the spirit! Face
your fears!"
"Go Farfet..." Just as Robert's about to pull Farfetch'd Pokeball off
his belt, the fifth Pokeball on Robert's belt pops open without warning
and releases red energy! In fact, it isn't a Pokeball... It's a Safari
Ball!
Tauros stands in front of the tiny Caterpie, stomping its front hoof.
"Taoooo! Taoooorus! Rus!"
Robert scratches his head, "I don't remember switching Slowbro with
Tauros..." He tries to recall that morning's events, and suddenly
sweatdrops, "Ooops! I must've made a mistake while using the Pokedex to
get Rilli's Haunter!" He looks down at the Pokedex strapped onto his
belt and sighs. "Okay, Tauros, Stomp that Caterpie!"
Tauros raises one hoof up high in the air... but before it crashes down,
the Caterpie begins to glow. The glow distracts the three tailed bull,
who misses the Caterpie completely when his hoof hits the ground!
Robert backs away, surprised, "It's going to become one of those ugly
green cocoon things?"
"A Metapod." Rilli explains, watching as the Caterpie changes shape...
The Bug changes shape... and settles on the form of a Tauros... a female
Tauros. A female Tauros in heat...
Mithril-rama sweatdrops, "Nooooo! It's that Ditto again!"
Robert grins, removes his backpack, and begins to rummage within it for
his Ultra Ball, "Now's my chance to catch it! Alright, Tauros... Weak...
en... it..." As Robert looks up from his backpack, he sees his own
Tauros mount the impostor female Tauros. "AHHHHH! Rilli, turn away!" He
runs over to Mithril-rama and shields her eyes from the two Tauros.
Loud noises ensue, including, but not limited to, snorting, squealing,
and hoof stomping. About three minutes after the noise starts, it dies
down, and Robert looks back at the Tauros. They both look very
exhausted. Robert contorts his face to display his disgust, "Eeeewww!
Have you ever heard of anything more disgusting, Rilli? A Ditto mating
with a creature outside of its species... pretending to be the species
its mating with? That's... just... wrong!"
Mithril-rama suddenly shivers, "Ditto... are disturbing."
The female Tauros transforms into a Pidgey and flies away! Robert's
Tauros gazes upwards as the Pidgey soars into the sky. He snorts a
farewell and turns to Robert. All of the Pokemon's excess testosterone
is gone, so he looks like a much gentler beast. His breathing rate has
decreased, and his three tails don't whip around as much as they used
to.
Robert nudges Mithril-rama, "I think this proves another theory of mine.
When a guy has too much..."
Mithril-rama places a single finger on Robert's lips, and Robert gets
the hint.
"Okay, okay." Robert grabs his Safari Ball and recalls Tauros into it.
"I guess he won't be bursting out of his balls... er, the ball...uhh,
the Pokeball... for a while. So, anyhow, let's keep going... The Diglett
Cave awaits!"
-Robert