From: "Insanellama" <insanellama316@yahoo.com> Subject: [PW!] Chaoticllama in dodge city Date: Tue, 6 Jul 1999 11:51:01 -0500 Chaoticllama brought the colt .45 peacemaker he had stashed away in his saddle bags out of retirement. He cleaned, and oiled it, and placed it in his holster. He recalled Firestorm from the top of the cliff. Then he recalled lowjack, and scaled the cliff face back to the top. Then he brought out lowjack, and thundered west through the forest. He made sure to keep a low profile, and went around pallet town instead of threw it. Just passed pallet, he stoped and removed the metal splints. He could do without them now. He had Lowjack burn the R patches that he had. He rode into a small town. There was a saloon called "Stone Wall Saloon." Chaoticllama decided to go on in. He recalled lowjack, and strode through the double swinging doors. Twenty pistols came up to cover him. Chaoticllama casually sauntered to the bar. "Local moonshine." he said to the barkeep and flipped a coin onto the bar. The man got Chaoticllama's drink and said, "People call me Doc." Chaoticllama gulped the shotglass. He almost let a stunned look cross his face. That stuff could probably be used as a pretty efficient paint remover. "Give me a bottle of that stuff." he said to Doc. Chaoticllama took the bottle, and sat down at an empty table. A couple of men were stunned that he had stood up to the hooch so well. A very large man waddled into the saloon. He had a badge on his chest that said "Sharriff" accross it. He waddled over to where Chaoticllama was, and said in between heavy breathing, "You're in my seat." Chaoticllama smiled up at the man, "I don't see any words on here on the chair or table that say Old Fat Man With His Head Up His Arse, so it doesn't have your name on it." The sharriff brought a hand up as if to slap Chaoticllama. Chaoticllama snapped up, and sent his chair flying backwards. "Look, I'm just here to enjoy the paint thinner. I don't enjoy being threatened by an old fool who hasn't seen his boots in 6 or seven years." There were a few snickers around the saloon, but 2 men stood up behind the Shariff, "You'd better get out of the sharriff's seat or else," said one of them. chaoticllama smiled, and kicked the shariff in the gutt. He went sailing backwards into the men. They came up in a rage. "Now we duel, RIGHT NOW, Me and my Partner here, verses you." Chaoticllama cooly took another drink from the bottle, "Only two of you, Doc I'll be back in a few minutes." Chaoticllama stepped to the door, and held one of the swinging door's open, "After you, victims." The two men were fuming. They figured Chaoticllama was easy pickings, being new in town, and having sampled the local hooch before the fight. They got into position 20 paces from Chaoticllama. Chaoticllama brushed back his cloak. Fingers flailed perilously close to gun handles. Then the two men made thier move. Chaoticllama manaaged to pull off one of the best draws of his life. One man never cleared leather. The other only managed a hasty shot in the dust. Chaoticllama's pistol was back in his holster before the first man hit the ground. Chaoticllama walked back into the bar. The shariff was now in his seat. Chaoticllama was thouroughly annoyed. He drew his pistol lightning quick, and covered the shariff. "Out of my seat, now, and out of town by sunset." The shariff stumbled up and waddled out the door. Chaoticllama holstered his pistol, and sat down. Doc walked over to him, "Well, seeing as you just evicted the old shariff, looks like you're the new one. My last name's Holiday, but as I said, people call me doc." He handed Chaoticllama a badge. Within seconds, hundreds of dollars showed up on his table. "What in Sam Hill is goin on here?" he said to no one in particular. Doc walked back over with another bottle of hooch, "That'll be your first installment of bribes." Doc patted him on the shoulder, and walked back to the bar. TBC