From: R2D2METWO
Subject: [PW!] Ener Lasser
Date: Sunday, July 25, 1999 11:35 AM
A tall, slender figure, accompanied by a Machamp and a Hitmonlee, walked
quickly towards Mount Moon. "Machamp, Machamp Champ?? Chaaaaaaaammmp???" "No,
Machamp, I am not giving you a piggyback ride. Maybe later." " MA - CHAMP!!!"
The exceptionally large Machamp folded both pairs of arms across his chest,
stuck out his bottom lip, and planted his butt firmly on the ground. "Machamp
Champ ChampMachamp!!" "Okay, okay, how 'bout this? When we get to Cerulean,
I'll buy you a Pikachu burger at the Pokémon café. "Machamp Machamp champ?"
"No, their not made from real Pikachu! Now come on, let's get going!" "Lee,
Hitmonlee?" "Fine, we can run there then." "MACHAMP!!" "Oh, come on you big
baby you can run. Besides, we need to catch up with that covered wagon or
whatever. We would be there already if you hadn't eaten all those cheese ballz
before we left!" "Champ Machamp!" "I don't care how much your stomach hurts!
Let's just go! Ready…set…See ya losers!" Machamp and Hitmonlee blasted after
the cheating Lasser in pursuit of the caravan that was pulled by an incredibly
fast Rapidash.
Lasser finally reached Cerulean gasping up to his Hitmonlee meditating on the
ground, not the least bit winded. Machamp stumbled a short distance behind
Lasser pumping one pair of his arms while grasping at his stomach with the
other two. "Ma…(gasp)…champ…(gasp)…*thud!*" Machamp fell flat on his face from
exhaustion "Hitmonlee! Ha Ha Ha Ha!" Hitmonlee cracked up at the sight of
Machamp lying on his face. He laughed so hard that he fell over himself. After
Lasser had rescued Hitmonlee from his laughing fit and Machamp had recovered
from his fall, all three of them went into the Pokémon café for breakfast.
There was an all-you-can-eat special going on at the café. "100 dollars each?
Hmmm, let's see here. Cool! I have enough for all three of us! Electabuzz,
Ivysaur, and Hitmonchan will have to wait to eat, I don't have enough money for
all of them." Hitmonlee and Lasser headed to the salad table to stack up on
Jell-O. Meanwhile, Machamp was disposing of the dessert tray. As soon as the
three of them were finished with their breakfast, and Machamp took some
Tylenol, Lasser heard an excited yell from Hitmonlee. "Monlee! Hitmon! Lee!!"
"What are you talking about? Boots? Why in the world would you want boots?"
Hitmonlee calmed down and repeated very patiently, "Monlee, Hitmon lee."
"What?! You mean Jerry's Persian? I thought that dipthong had gone to the Elite
Four a long time ago?" Hitmonlee grabbed Lasser on both sides of his head and
turned Lasser's head until he was looking at the back of a boy conferring with
the Persian sitting across from him. Lasser could just make out the deep blue
jewel embedded in the Persian's forehead, replacing the usual red one. "That is
Boots! But that really doesn't look like Jerry. Hmmm… strange. I hope that the
new guy hasn't made Boots keep his old name. As I recall, the Persian HATED the
name "Boots". So would I, so ya can't blame him, anyway.. Hey.. Machamp, get
over here!" Lasser waited until the Pokémon had built up enough courage to
leave his precious ice cream after convincing himself that no one would steal
it. "Do you recognize that Persian?" Machamp squinted a little, then drew back,
shocked. "MA - Chaaamp!!!" "Exactly. Now, guys, follow me." Lasser sidled up to
the table and said, "Hey, boots, how ya doin'?" suddenly the Persian turned
around and jumped on Lasser, purring happily. "Hello, I assume you know
Pardus?" Lasser managed to get up from under Pardus to greet the stranger that
looked about 15, only a year older than him. "Hello, my name is Darian McCain.
Nice to meet you. What is your name? I would normally not ask, but since Pardus
obviously trusts you, It might be nice to travel together." Lasser decided the
stranger was a bit too formal, but that is probably because he has no friends
except his Pokémon, but that would change. Then Lasser had an Idea. "My name is
Lasser Raidon. Pardus, you say? Is that what he goes by now? He must enjoy
that better than Boots…anyway, he used to belong to my "best friend", well,
according to my mother. I thought he was an idiot. And a jerk. And any other
diss you can think of that I can't say because there are young Pokémon present.
Did you ever notice that blue jewel on Pardus' forehead? It is red on most
Persians. That is how we could tell it was Pardus. The blue jewel." Darian
looked shocked. "You mean that Pardus has a different Jewel than most Persians?
Cool!" Lasser decided it was time to cut the small talk about now. "I want to
see what sort of training you've done on your Persian. Let's see if you are
better than Jeremy." "What are you talking about?" I'm talking about a battle.1
on 1. Your Pardus Vs my Machamp. C'mon, let's go! Just a friendly battle,
C'mon!!! Even ask your Persian, please??" Darian walked over to his Persian,
who was having a friendly conversation with Hitmonlee and Machamp. "Hey,
Pardus, wanna fight the Machamp?" the Persian's eyes glinted dangerously as he
got as malicious a face as a Persian can get. "Peeaeerr-ssiaan!!!" "Allright
then." Darian walked back over to Lasser and said "Okay, if Pardus is up for
it, let's go!!!!"