From: Roberto Perez-Vila
Subject: [PW!] Psyduck Gets What He Deserves
Date: Tue, 06 Jul 1999 01:14:06 -0400
Minax sits casually on the sidewalk in front of he Celadon City Mega
Pokemart. She's been staring at the building quite a while, wondering
if she should go inside and buy a Water Stone to evolve her ungrateful
Poliwhirl. People walk in front of her on occasion, and speed up the
pace of their walk if they notice the holster dangling from her belt.
As a mother and her child run away from where she sits, she sighs,
realizing that once you go Rocket, you never go back.
She pulls the second Pokeball off her belt and extends her arm
forward. It snaps open and red light pours out, forming into a large
Poliwhirl. He blinks his giant eyes twice and stares at Minax.
"Whirl?"
"Do you want to evolve into Poliwrath?" Minax keeps her eyes off of
the swirl on the Poliwhirl's belly, knowing that he'd try to hypnotize
her if she gazed into it.
"Whirl!!!" The Pokemon tries to nod, which is a difficult task since
he has no neck, "Whirl! Whirl!"
Minax stares at the Pokemon's eyes with her own dark brown, unblinking
eyes, "Why?"
The Poliwhirl tries to close his ridiculously oversized white hands to
form a fist, but continually fails. Only after he evolves into the
Fighting Pokemon known as Poliwrath will his hands be able to make a
fist, and he's trying to let Minax know this. She doesn't seem to
understand, so he walks up to her and Doubleslaps her shoulders!
Minax darts up from her place on the ground and spits at her Pokemon,
"You want to evolve into the Fighting Pokemon in order to kick my ass,
huh? Tough luck, Poliwhirl... you'll die before I let you grab a Water
Stone."
"Poli..." Poliwhirl narrows his eyes up at Minax, whose saliva is
dripping down his belly. He is immediately sucked back into his
Pokeball, which is placed back on Minax's belt.
"Celadon City is so very boring..." Minax looks at all the posters
advertising products that don't interest her, "Murdering some kid's
Pokemon should be fun! I haven't done that since... Magmar? Ahh yes,
he was tasty!" She quickens her pace and runs eastward, until she
finds herself in the area of land between Celadon City and Saffron.
She waits...
A thirteen year old boy with spiky black hair wearing a white tank
top, baggy brown pants, and dirty sneakers emerges from the
Underground Tunnel, speaking to himself and uttering much profanity.
Minax sets her eyes on him and gracefully marches up to him. She
smiles as she whispers, "Let's have a Pokemon match, spikes!"
"Spikes?!" The angry boy squints his eyes, "The hell ya call me that
fer? M'name's Mike, damnit, and if yer out to fight my Pokemon, yer
out to get an ass woopin', red."
"My, my... What a dirty mouth." Minax presses one finger on his lips,
her purple fingernail gleaming in the sunlight, "You wouldn't want me
to wash it out with soap. I tried doing that to a Magikarp once and he
didn't like it too much."
"The hell ya think you are, bitch?" He swats Minax's finger aside, and
reaches for his belt. Apparently it is very loose, because his baggy
pants and hanging around his knees. "Let's get it on."
"Fine, Mike." Minax places her hand on Zubat's Pokeball, and raises it
up into the air. After a flash of red light, Zubat flaps around in the
air, and finally settles on Minax's shoulder.
"Yeaaa, boy, that frickin' Zubat's gonna die when he meets my badass
Pokemon..." The boy scoffs in Minax's direction and pulls a Pokeball
off his belt, "Arbok, let's bite..." The unruly teen isn't able to
finish his thought, because a Pokeball on his belt erupts and releases
a Psyduck with a vacant look in his eyes. "AWWW CRAP!"
"Psy?" The Psyduck looks up at his master with his small arms on the
sides of his aching head, "Psyduck?"
"Zubat, Bite." Minax points at the Psyduck and her Pokemon screeches
in agreement. He flies down towards the Psyduck and sinks his large
fangs into the duck's large, strangely shaped head.
"Crap! Crap! Crap!" Mike calls out, knowing his Psyduck can't possibly
win.
Minax raises one eyebrow at Mike, "Are you a Crap Pokemon, Mike? Your
Psyduck sure seems to be." Minax's Zubat's single Bite makes the weak
Psyduck faint, face forward. The winning Pokemon flies back to his
trainer's shoulder and perches there once again. He stretches out his
wings and screeches. Minax then reaches into her holster and pulls out
her silver pistol. She aims it at the fainted Psyduck, "...and now
your Pokemon dies."
"Go ahead..." Mike growls, kicking the Psyduck on the ground, "I don't
like the bastard, anyway."
Minax isn't sure how to react at first, but she quickly recomposes
herself and speaks, "You monster." Her gun still resting in her right
hand, she walks over towards Mike, grabs him by the neck with her left
hand, and throws him to the ground. Minax's Zubat flies off her
shoulder and circles around Minax's head. The tall, imposing, red
haired woman places her foot on Mike, dangerously close to his groin,
and points her pistol at him, "How could you say that?"
Mike's position doesn't seem to phase him as he shouts out, "Waddya
mean? He's crap! I should've never caught him! So kill the bastard
already and let me go to Celadon. I gotta beat the Grass whore and get
my badge."
"How about I kill *you* instead?" Minax tightens her grip on her
pistol and grins at the crude kid.
Mike keeps arguing in his same, cool voice, "You don't got the balls,
chick."
Minax pulls the trigger on her gun.
"You whore!" Mike cries out in a warbling voice, the tone sounding
much more like a kid his age should, "You shot my shoulder! You...
You... ARGH!" He grabs his right shoulder with his left arm.
"Here's what I want you to do, Mike." Minax continues pointing her
pistol at the bleeding child on the ground, and tosses her hair aside
with her left hand, "You will train that Psyduck until he evolves,
with tender love and care. You *will* learn how to love your Pokemon
the same way I love mine. If I see you again and you don't have your
Psyduck by your side, I'll be sure to finish the job I started here.
Now go. You won't die if you get some bandages on that shoulder."
"I... I... Oh, fine. Let me go." Mike struggles to get up once Minax
releases him.
Minax crouches in front of Mike's fainted Psyduck and kisses him on
the head, leaving red lipstick there, "You'll get what you deserve,
Psyduck... a trainer who loves you. I'll make sure of it." She stands
up and glares at Mike, who is still holding on to his wounded
shoulder, "Oh, and if anyone asks you who did this, it was a big burly
bald thug with lots of facial hair. The police seem to like arresting
people who look like that."
"Why... why should I?" Mike asks, his voice trembling.
"You seem like a smart kid, Spikes..." Minax smiles and rubs her hand
across his spiky hair, "You can figure it out." Once Mike recalls his
fainted Psyduck into his Pokeball, Minax disappears in the distance.
-Minax
(( NS: No one interact with Minax, because I'm leaving on a vacation
soon. ))