From: Chuck Einhorn
Subject: [PW!]A Grand ol' Time in Saffron, Part 2(finally!)
Date: Monday, August 09, 1999 5:02 PM
Ok, Ok, I know, I said I would have this up tommorow, last TUESDAY, but
I've had precious little time. Tornado cleanup, regular chores, and
family get-to-gethers can eat away at your time. Well, I'm trying,
don't worry! If you thought I did bad, imposible stuff last time, don't
worry, this will explain your questions most likely.
Here go's nothin'......
After a good week of walking, Dernam finally found himself in
Saffron. He looked around at the streets. He'd always
imagined them being busy, bussling, and full of people, but traffic was
light. He was plesantly suprised. He called out
Magnemite. Magnemite zipped out of his pocket in the backpack.
"Magnemite, were is the Pokémon Center?" he inqiured. Magnemite
thought a bit. Then it aimed it's eye up, and it's
magnets twitched. Dernam thought it looked cute. It must be looking
for a sattelite. It then turned, and led him through the
streets. He eventually came upon the center. He walked in and handed
his 3 balls to the nurse. He was suprised by her
resemblence to Nurse Joy back in Fuschia, but he kept cool and waited
for his Pokémon to be refreshed. He left and thought
of what to do next.
Of course, he thought of what he had done all the way up, and that
was eat his own cooking, which left much to be desired.
He absolutely MUSt find a decent place to eat. He asked Magnemite, and
it again led him through the streets till he came to a
small, open air cafe. It was built alongside a building that housed the
kitchen, with a 9-foot tall art-deco wall in front, with 7
foot-tall walls on the sides. As he walked toward the hole in the wall
that was the door, he slipped on his observationary
glasses. They appeared to be sunglasses, but they were more akin to
one-way mirrors. While he saw the world from behind
the equivilant of a car windshield, his eyes were totally hidden behind
the glasses, allowing him to get an unadultered look at
things without being obvious.
He walked into the cafe and looked around. The tables were in a
radiating oblong x, with rows of tables forming v's in the
gaps. A waiter standing by the door greeted him.
"Please seat yourself, sir." he said in a deep, gravely voice.
Dernam thought he may have done a lot of screaming as a child.
That, or puberty was really going nasty on him.
"Thank you, I intend to do just that." He looked and found an empty
table in the right corner. He walked over and put his
back to the wall. This was probably the safest position in the whole
place. The first day Wild Bill Hickhock threw caution to
the wind and sat away from a wall, he got shot. That wasn't a good
thing. He looked at the table. It was a fancy looking, yet
cheap, wireframe thing, with a piece of glass on top. The menu was
placed between the true table-top and the glass. He
glanced at it quickly. He heard music, and quickly identified it as
Fastball's Out of My Head. Good song. A pretty blond
waitress came and he ordered a hamburger and some onion rings.
He sat there for awhile, talking the best he could with Magnemite as
he waited for his food. Fastball ended, and an old
lovey-dovey song by Phil Collins came on. He absolutely hated this
song. He decided to take the take to look around. He
could see 2 guys and a girl at the center. On the far left corner was a
guy and someone who appeared to be his girlfriend. He
saw some girls about his age sitting and giggling hust to the right of
the middle. He saw couples, business men, groups of
friends, white people, black people, asians, a grand melting pot of the
human race. He just hoped he didn't stand out.
He began to think of how obvious his weaponry was. The handle of
his sword was over his left shoulder. It had a 10-inch
handle, black, and a 24-inch double-edged blade, titanium-steel alloy,
acid-ecthed. He realized it wasn't a practical weapon,
mostly for backup and last resort. His modular bo was over his right
shoulder. It came in 2 parts, 1 that was straight, with one
end smaller then the other. The other had a 4 part lotus-type opening.
The smaller end was placed through the opening, and
the "petals" closed over it, locking it in place. It was made of sturdy
aluminum-steel, with an interior of carbon-honeycomb
compound, making it sturdy but light. it was much more practical, as it
wouldn't kill so much. His sais were tucked in under his
shirt, and he had a boot knife, but those were hidden.
He also thought of the Pokémon he had. Gyarados was a bit larger
than normal, 22 feet, 6 inches long, weight 559 pounds.
The main reason for it's size was the fact that it was a she. Because
Magikarp have such a high mortality rate, the female must
produce alot of eggs, and thus was larger than a male. She had great
strength, but was slower than the smaller males. She was
the standard blue, white belly, yellow spots variety. She knew how to
Tackle, Bite, Dragon Rage, Leer, and Hydro Pump,
and he had taught her how to Bind and Slam, much like an Onix. She had
a vicious roar that could easily scare away almost all
but the most fearless of enemies.
Scyther was also female, but for her spiecies, she was thus smaller,
at 4 feet 7 inches tall, and 114 pounds. Her coloration
was unigue, a sort of calico cat, were her body was green, with blending
patches of beige, brown and black. It reminded him
of camoflague. She was the opposite of Gyarados, not as strong as here
male counterparts, but faster and more nimble. She
knew how to use Quick Attack, Leer, Focus Energy, Double Team, Slash,
Swords Dance, and Agility. He had personally
trained her to use Fury Swipes, Karate Chop, Take Down, Double Kick, and
was trying to teach her how to use her wings for
a nice Hi Jump Kick, but she didn't have it down yet.
Nidorino was male, of course, but not typical. He fought more like
a Nidorina, prefering to use his claws and teeth then his
horn. He was pretty typical otherwise, exactly 3 feet high, 46 pounds.
He was a shade or two darker than normal, but he
didn't stand out as such. He knew Leer, Tackle, Horn Attack, Poison
Sting, Focus Energy, Fury Attack, Horn Drill, and had
recently learned Double Kick. He also had been taught to Bite, Fury
Swipe, use Rolling Kick, and Headbutt. Not to mention
that he had Toxic from back in the Koga days. Dernam was itching to get
his hands on a Moon Stone.
Graciously, the Phil Collins song stopped, and a new song,
Everlast's What It's Like came on. He really liked this song. He
saw the waitress coming with his order. He began to sing the song
quietly to himself. He didn't mind the swearing. Censorship
was for Sunday Morning Cartoons, not music. He personally couldn't even
understand some of the lyrics, but he liked it that
way. It left more to the mind's eye, more room for personal
interpritation. As the first part of the song went past, a quick
movement near the center of the room caught his eye.
He turned his head towards the group of girls he had seen, then
moved his eyes toward the middle table. On the left was a
boy, perhaps 10, wearing blue jeans, a re and white jacket, and a red
hat. A Pikachu, probably his, sat next to him, munching
on some fruit. In the middle of the table was a girl, maybe 11 or 12,
red head, holding an egg-like thing. She had been the
quick movement he saw. She had apparently been shocked by what Whity
Ford was saying, and now had her fingers in the
egg-things ears. He tried to make it a point not to look, but she was
wearing a cut-off yellow shirt, suspenders(suspenders?),
and short shorts. The third one, on his right, was another guy, perhaps
13 0r 14, with dark skin, squinted eyes, and wearing a
vest. It appeared he had tyied to ask one of the girls out, but got
dumped. He also noticed many of the girls smiling, giggling,
and waving at him. He chewed on his hamburger and ignored them. He
wasn't impressed by such immaturity.
This didn't intrest him much, really, but something else caught his
eye. At the opposite corner was yet another group, a guy
and a girl he had seen later. They had on casual dress and the male had
on sunglasses. They weren't to special at first, but he
noticed odd behavior. The looked around like everyone else, but they
did id to MUCH. They were constantly moving there
gave, looking the longest at the blond waitress and deep-voiced waiter.
But ecspecially at the middle group. Everlast ended
and Eve 6, Inside out, radiated from the corner jukebox.. He tried to
tell what they were doing.
After some observation, he decided that they were staring at the
Pikachu. There eyes followed it's every move. They
weren't being to professional about it, and he could tell exactly what
was going on. They wanted that Pkachu. Bad. They
must be looking at the waitress and waiter because they could call the
police, and ruin their plans. Somethin' would be going
down soon. Then the little mouse made a wrong move. It settled down
next to the girl's right arm, as close to the 2 perps and
as far from his friends as he could be. Eve 6 stopped, and the 2
possible thieves looked at each other, and stood up. It was
go time. Dernam stuffed the last bit of hamburger into his mouth, put
magnemite in his backpack hangar, slipped the pack on,
and stood up. He prayed with all his might to get a good fighting song,
Maybe Whiskey in the Jar by Metallica, Sikamikanico
from the Red Hot Chili Peppers, Ozzy Osbourne, Ol' Dirty Bastard, and
Crystal Method's Vapor Trail, or even Elton John's
Saturday Night's all Right for Fighting.
He got Ricky Martin's The Cup of Life. Hell, he'd be embarrassed to
tell his friends he had even listened to this song, let
alone fought to it. But now was not the time. Ricky or no, he had to
act. the two thieves walked toward the middle table at
full tilt. He walked casually, so as not to draw attention. He drew
Scyther's pokéball, and walked. It happened just as he
planned at firrst. The Pikachu looked up and saw him, and got nervous.
It backed up to the edge of the table. Th kid in the
red jacket looked up and said something to the girl. She too looked up
and began talking quickly, hitting the older boy in the
shoulder. She then picked up the egg and talked to it awhile. The 2
perps were close now..........he decided to act. He
tapped the ball, and felt it fill his hand. The girl ended her
conversation with the egg-thing to sweat a little. Dernam had
decided a long time ago not to say anything while trowing a ball. It
was slow and wasteful. He drew it over his left shoulder,
and gave it a good back-hand toss.
The electric mouse got the pont. As Scyther came out of the ball,
the Pikachu jumped over to it's master, now on the floor.
Scyther's left bladed hand came down, right were the Pikachu was.....and
immediatly grabbed by accident by the thief girl.
Scyther was standing there, looking at 2 people, one of which had a
deathgrip on her claw. She was throughly pissed off. She waited for an
order. Dernam punched the table he was standing by, an audial order
meaning basiclly "one attack, await results." Scyther screamed, and
lunged forward, spreading her arms, blades back, and clotheslined the
perpatrators. The girl, who appeared to be stunned from the experience,
dove under the table, yelling about bugs. This was funny. Scyther
assumed a ready position. The two would-be thieves stood up.
"You little punk!" the girl shouted.
"Do you realize what you just did?" Yeah, I whooped yo ass, he
"Prepare for trouble."
"Make it double."
"To protect the world from devastation."
"To unite all people within our nation."
"James!" Jesse? James? Jesse James? Coincidence, I think not.
"Team Rocket blasts off at the speed of light!" Team Rocket? That
was corny as hell, he thought.
"Surrender now, or prepare to fight!" Gladly.
Dernam thought that was the most moronic thing he had ever heard.
And there outfit's didn't exactly look like they were made by
Abercrombie & Fitch. He couldn't help but smile.
"Ohh, never mind." Jesse said. "Arbok!" James added, "Weezing!"
Dernam was a little concerned. Scyther may have more stamina, attack,
and speed than either a Weezing or Arbok, but they had the elemental
advantage, as well as greater numbers. Scyther became conserned. She
backed up, and her abdomen poked at the red-head under the table's face,
making here scream. People were closing in for a closer look. Idiots.
They could be in danger. A Weezing can't easily aim a Smog attack.
Putting their lives at risk for a cheap thrill. How moronic. Dernam
decided to get them out of the way, and assist Scyther. He could have
used Nidorino, but the people wouldn't leave. He needed to scare them
away. And who else to do the job than a true Leviathan?
Gyarados was perfect for instilling a sense of terror. A massive
Pokémon could easily be assumed to not always follow commands because of
their feelings of superiority. People understood this, and realized
that the Pokémon might literally be a loose cannon. Gyarados, however,
listened to him without exception. He had saved it when it was beached
as a Magikarp, and took care of it despite what all others said. Such
things were not forgotted easily. He let fly, and Gyarados came out,
letting out a blood-curdling scream. It knocked a few people down when
it appeared, and her appearance was followed by screams and a general
rush for the door.
Dernam figured the 2 "Team Rocket" punks would have liked to do the
same. But it was to late for that. Dernam gave another order. 1 rap
on a surface with both hands ment "do as you will." Scyther and
Gyarados loved that. Gyarados took off, slammed the Arbok, and flew
on. Dernam loved Gyarados's graceful, undulating motion of flight. The
Arbok attempted a Counter, but Scyther rammed it from the side.
Gyarados sprayed them all with a Hydro pump. Scyther gave Slashes all
around. Gyarados bit the Weezing hard, and Scyther knocked the Arbok
down with an effective Take Down. They were all in heap now, Arbok,
Weezing, Rocket one, Rocket two. Gyarados saw an opening. She reared
up, and swung her tail at the group. They went flying. Beautiful.
Dernam had to go now. He didn't want recognition, the feeling of
accomplishment was enough. He walked towards the door. Then he
remembered a great scene from an old Star Wars movie. He reached into
his pocket and drew out a half-dollar. He flipped it to the waiter, and
did his best Harrison Ford. "Sorry about the mess." He walked out the
door and turned left. A policewoman with a striking resemblence to
Officer Jenny back in Fuschia pulled up in a motorcycle. She got out
and walked his way. He pointed at the door. "Better hurry Officer.
It's real bad back there." She gave him a suspicious look, then walked
on. He turned the corner, then heard yelling. Followed by rapid
He quickly looked for an escape route. The nearest shop was too
far. So was the opposite side of the street. But then he noticed the
cafe wall. The front wall was very tall, to provide privacy from the
adjacent building. This was unnessacary for the sides, so the owner had
saved a few bucks by making them smaller. He easily grabbed the top and
flung himself over. He landed on the other side quietly, leaving
nothing but empty street for his persuers. He looked around. The place
was a soaked mess. The waiter and waitress were gone. He decided the
half dollar just wouldn't foot the bill. He got over the other low wall
and left the opposite way.
He was tired now. He needed a rest, even if he hadn't done musch
work. He looked for a hotel. He found a nice, but affordable place to
stay. He checked in to room 59. He threw his stuff down, amd made
himself at home. He went to the bathroom, took a shower, and brushed
his teeth(chicks dig a good set of pearly whites, his father used to
say.) He turned on the TV. HBO had a Jackie Chan marathon going. He
watched the TV, but Magnemite was impatient. Dernam tried to give him
something to do. He finally decided to put him on survailence, after
reading his owner's manual. He got lucky.
Halfway through Rumble in the Bronx, at about 9:30 P.M., Magnemite
went nuts. Dernam had no idea what was wrong. Magnemite dropped one of
his screws, and it was attached to a cord. He looked at his owner's
manual, and found an input jack on his Pokédex. He plugged the "screw"
into it, and an image came up on the screen. The words "IR camera"
blinked a few times. Then, a picture slowly formed. 2 figures, one
short, one a head taller, made out of varying shades of Red, yelloy,
orange and white showed up, threw the wall.....and 1 electric mouse.
Room 57 was occupied by the two kids from earlier. This put his
anominomy at risk. You else to blab than the people moxst likely to
freak out at the side of him? He grabbed Magnemite and turned him
towards the opposite wall. A short, slender figure holding an
egg-shaped creature. Surrounded.
This was not good AT all. He had to decide a course of action. He
guessed they had had a long day. He was used to getting up early.
Bingo. He set his clock to 5:00 A.M. He looked back at the guys. They
were already in bed. He turned it to the girl's side. She was rocking
the egg-think. Jesus, he thought. She treats that thing like a baby.
She leaned over and did something , and some small red spots appeared on
his screen. He looked beside himself. A radio. He turned it on.
Cheyrl Crow's Sweet Child of Mine came on. He didn't like this song one
bit. The girl rocked it some more, and it fell asleep, apparently. She
sat there for a mometn, then put it down. She reached up and,
apparently wiped away a tear. Dernam thought. "Here was a girl, so
moved by this song and her love for this egg-guy, that she is moved to
the point of sobbing with love."
He couldn't help but bust a gut on that one. He laughed loud and
long. She could probably hear him, but he wasn't afraid of that. He'd
be gone before she even woke up. He was sure of that.
His alarm went of at 5:00A.M., right on time. He got up and got his
clothes on. He slpped his pack on, and ordered Magnemite into his
pocket. He wshed his face, brushed again, and went back into the room.
He cleaned up, removed all evidence that he had been there. He looked
at the draped windows. It looked like a bright, sunny, perfect day. He
walked over to the window, and opened it up.
News vans in the parking lot.
This was worse than ever. He couldn't escape loke this. He called
Magnemite out, and turned on the IR camera. He aimed it at the end of
the hall. Tall woman walking towards his room. Jenny look-a-like
perhaps? Bad,bad,badbadbadbad. He retreated to the bathroom. He
looked around. No way out. No windows, no, trapdoors, no.........fan?
He looked up. He HAD turned a fan on when he took a shower, and he saw
it, right above the toilet. He took a closer look. It was hinged on
one side, and on the other, was held up by two screws, with wide plastic
tops on them, for easier turning. He quickly unscrewed them, and the an
swung down. He looked up. The duct had to accomadate the whole floor,
so it was quite wide. He could easily fit in.
"This only happens in movies and bad fanfics....." he thought to
himself. He didn't complain further. He crawled inside, making sure to
bring his pack. A knock at the door. Hurry, hurry........ He swung
the fan shut, and turned the screws with his fingers throught the
grating of the fan installment. He slid himself backwards, and waited.
Then he thoguht that she might find this suspicoius. He'd better get
somewhere safer. They'd tear up his room. But someone else's
room...... That had him thinking. The 3 people that had him surrounded
may be more likely to freak out, but also more likely to do him a
favor. But they were probably still asleep this early. And who's room
to go to?
He supposed the guy's room would be the most socially acceptable.
But they had another little problem....a pikachu. Pikachu's had great
hearing. It would hear him a mile away. And when it did wake up, it
could easily sniff him out. Thundershock didn't sound too pleasant.
But the other room..... What was there? A 11 or 12 year-old girl,
terribly afraid of bugs. Scyther could shut her up easily. And the egg
probably didn't have the super-senses of a Pikachu. Easy entery, easy
hide, easy out. Sounded like a plan to him.
He crawled through the duct, silently pushing his pack ahead of
him. He could hear things below him, but he was confident he was silent
to them. He could see light head. He soon came to the next room's
fan. Same setup as before. He quickly unscrewed it and swung it down
quietly. He dropped down, then reached up for his backpack. He looked
to the door, and slipped on his gloves. No use in leaving prints. He
walked over and eased it open. He peeked inside. The girl from earlier
was asleep, holding the little egg. How cute. Now, to business. He
needed a place to hide. Bathroom? Yeah right. Closet? Corny. No
large things to get under. Except the bed. Hey, it's better than
nothing. He tiptoed over and knelt down. He stealthily slid under the
bed. It was high enough for him to turn his head side to side, but low
enough he couldnn't be seen unless he was intentionally looked for. She
wasn't storing anything under the bed, so she had no other reason to
He stayed under the bed for what seemed like hours. Then, he heard
knocking on the door. Her friends perhaps? The girl got up, and walked
over to the window and looked outside. Then she walked to the door and
"Hello, mam, I......hey, wait, I saw you yesterday, didn't I?"
"Uhh, yaa, you did."
"You wouldn't happen to have seen the guy from the cafe again, have
"No. Why?" Good girl.
"Turns out, the receptionist here saw the artist's conception you
and your friends helped us make, and said he checked into the room next
"Then why don't you go to his room?"
"Simple. I did. He isn't there." Duh. "But the receptionist says
hasn't left. He isn't here is he?" No, he's not here. Hehehehe.
"No! I would have killed him before he got in here!" He checked
"Well, OK, I'll take your word for it. If you do see him again,
don't hesitate to tell me." Hesitate all you want.
"Ok, and by the way.......what's with the press outside."
"Oh, them? The press is hailing him as a hero, what with stopping
Team Rocket, and all." Hero. Damn.
"Well, ok, good-bye."
"Good-bye!" Good riddance. Green day, great song.
The girl sighed. Then she started rummaging around. She turned the
radio on. Then she went over to the bathroom, holding some clean
clothes. Probably going to take a shower. Good. At least she wouldn't
come out with nothing but a towel on, or worse. He relaxed a little.
The song on the radio was a classic, Elton John, Don't Let the Sun Go
Down on Me. He liked his music a little louder and volital, but this
was still good stuff. He tried to get comfortable. But the egg-thing
crawling around on the bed made him nervous. Then, the moment of
truth. He heard it give a loud "Bbbbrrriiiiiiiiiii!". It fell of the
bed, flipped over........and saw him. It's eyes ballooned. Crap.
His security was now breached. He could reason with it, but judging
by the way the girl treated it, it was too young. He couldn't knock it
out or hide it. Below the bed would be the first place she'd look. No,
he had to go straight to the source. He couldn't leave the room.
Reporters and cops everywhere, probably. Liitle egg to give away his
position. He'd have to come out of hiding, and talk to the girl
directly. But the first thing she'd do is scream when she saw him,
so.......a non-lethal ambush would be best. He shot a hand at the egg,
and covered it's mouth. He came out from under the bed. He placed the
egg-guy on the nightstand, and turned the radio up. That should give
him a little cover noise. He walked over to the door, and stood beside
it, to his right, away from the way the door opens. The egg was looking
at him. He didn't care. Sugar Ray's Somday came on. The shower
stopped. A minute or two later, the door opened she walked out, dressed
"Hi, Togepi, you miss me?" So it was called Togepi. She looked at
the "Togepi" again. Now or never. He shot his hand and closed it over
her mouth. He turned her head at him so she could get a good look. He
pulled his hand back and motioned over his mouth.
She got angery fast. "Why you...."
"Shh." He remembered a scene in an old movie he saw.
"When Ash and...." So, one of them was named Ash.
"Let me introduce you to a man called Shh! When he says Shh! you
"When a problem comes along, you must Zipit."
"Zipit good." He had really enjoyed Austin powers. He decided to
shut her up, get her to cool down. He remembered the effect swearing
had on her last time. "To be quite honest, madam, I'm telling you to
Worked like a charm.
"Now, if you'll slow down and shut up for a while, maybe we can get
this straightened out. Any questions?"
"Yes, how on Earth did you get in here."
"Black Magic." A little sarcasm never hurt nobody.
"Uhhhhhhh.....Ok......why are you in my room, you perv?!"
"Avoiding the press. They seem to want to make a hero out of me, or
"Helloooooo!" she said. "Being a hero gets you money and
recognition, book deals and women, you know?" He had no use for that.
"My, an uninformed one. That's were your wrong! The press makes
hero's for one reason. They put you on a pedestal so that you may fall
farther down. If they found me, I would never be able to walk the
streets. First they'd see me for saving a measly little Pikachu, then
for my drug addiction, broken home, and pedophilia." He really believed
"All untrue, of course. But try telling that to The Enquirer." A
knock on the door.
"Hey, Misty," Ash's voice chimed. "Can Brock and I come in?" So,
the young one was Ash, and the older one was Brock. Dernam had a wierd
way of picking things like that up. Plus, the girl was Misty. How
"Now if you don't mind, I'll be in the bathroom." He walked to the
bathroom, and closed the door behind himself. He climbed up, and
rescrewed the fan on. He waited. A little bit of talk outside, then
the door to the bathroom opened. Someone came in, but he couldn't see.
He waited somemore. A flush. He scouted to the edge and looked down.
Empty. He still didn't think it was safe. A minute later, the door
opened again. The girl "Misty" walked in, looked around, and left.
Now he felt it was safe. He dropped down and walked out the door of the
bathroom, just as Misty was ready to leave. She looked back with an
expression of awe.
"Why the suprised look?"
"How the heck did you do that?"
He grinned wide. "Simple. I take a vile of goat's blood, draw an
inverted pentagram with it, chant some stuff in Swahili, then I'm
transported up to the mother ship, where I control the U.S. President by
remote control." More good, wholehearted sarcasm. "Now you leave. I
shall remain here until the press dies down, and then hopefully, we'll
never see each other again. And don't forget your Togepunk. You be
more careful in the future,
"Kasumi? What's that." He grinned.
"It means a very disagreeable, bitchy female, in Japanese."
technically, the way she had been, he wasn't lieing.
"RRRRrrrrr.......just shut up.....hey, what's your name, anyway?"
"Brtz Shmertz." It sounded like a bad excusion of something(books
shmooks, tests shmests......) but it was really the name of a Hungarian
boxer......of the 13th century of course. It would take her forever to
figure that out. She left wthout a word.
Dernam stayed behind for a while. He had to decide what to do.
Then it struck him. The press won't lay off. The fact that he hasn't
left, but was here, would keep them there for some time. He had to get
out. He knew how.
He dug into his backpack and got out his supplies. He went to the
pathroom with 2 bottles and some contacts. He came out with blond hair,
green eyes, and lighter skin. Gotta love tinted contacts, special body
lotion, and hair dye. He changed into a special shirt his friend Bill
gave him. It was beige with the familiar Tommy Hilfiger logo, but had
the pilsbury doughboy on it, with the words Tummy Pokéfinger. He had
drawn on the ' above the e himself. He also put on some khaki's by gap,
but he couldn't dance to save his soul. He put on a tiny pair of
shades, the kind that seemed to be so in fashion a while back, and a red
hat, backwards of course.
One last touch. He called out Nidorino. The aggressive Pokémon
immediatly took up a fighting stance. "Cool it, Nidorino, your in pet
mode." Nidorino instantly calmed down, and started to act friendly.
Dernam took his backpack off. It was still too obvious. He pulled some
flaps down, put his weapons in it, adjusted the straps and......voila!
It was a blue-and-black duffel bag. He slung it over his shoulder, and
walked out. He headed towards the door, and waved at the receptionist.
Then he thought of an old saying. This joke must be complete.
He ordered Nidorino on his back feet. He stood up. Dernam grabbed
his front hands and thus WALTZED out the door. Perfect. Of course, the
press hounddog showed no intrest in him. A clean getaway. Beautiful.
And now, onward with his life. He wanted to do stuff. No time like the
There! Whoo, I finally got that done. If you liked it or thought
it was really lame ass, send your complaints to firstname.lastname@example.org.