From: Chuck Einhorn <unicorns@mmtcnet.com> Subject: [PW!] Badge Battle, Dernam's Numero Uno Date: Friday, September 10, 1999 2:56 PM Daisy smiled, nodded, and walked through the doors leading to the side hall of the gym. Dernam walked more slowly behind, staying back. He tapped his backpack, and Magnemite zipped out of his "Hangar." "You, go to the sound control room, put something good on." Magnemite nodded the best a Magnemite could, then zipped away, humming to itself. Dernam proceeded to follow stealthily behind Daisy. He must carefully judge what Misty would do now that he was out of his guise and as she last remembered....... <Elsewhere> Daisy ran up to Misty, who was conversing with Violet and Lily. "Hey, Misty, someone called, like, Dernam said he's here to fight you!" "Really? Great, I knew he'd come. Well, better go, I think he'll be expecting me." Lily: "Who is he, your boyfriend?" Misty: "No, don't be silly!" He's just a guy I met, we're sorta friends." Violet: "Uh huh, yeah, like, whatever..." Daisy: "You hear something?" They all listened closely...... Misty: "Sounds like someone's singing a recipe!" Violet: "Yeah, I heard a half a stick of butter somewhere." Lily: 'I ,like, wonder what song it is?" Isaac Hayes, singing: "Say, everybody, have you seen my balls, they're big and salty and brown!" Misty: "Ewwww! What is that music from anyway? Where's Dernam?" <Then> Dernam heard the selection from the speakers. Magnemite had "Chocolate Salty Balls", from the South Park Album on. Boy, that was weird. Oh well. He saw figures through the next door. 4 figures approaching, as he could see their outlines through the frosted glass. He simply stood on the other side, his hands crossed, his face cover partly with his sunglasses, his mouth drawn straight and emotionless. They came through the door, jabbering about the music. Then Misty saw him. First, she was utterly confused. She stood, looking at his rather imposing figure, decked out in black, standing like statue. Then, 2 and 2 made 4 in her head as realization came to place, and it was a little too much. So much, in fact, that she fainted, and flopped to the floor in a heap. "Well, damn, it is a bit hard to fight someone unconscious, now isn't it?" Dernam had a very sarcastic tone of voice. "Any of you ladies interested?" The red-head spoke up first. "Why'd she do that?" Dernam was agitated at this blatant side-step around his question. Misty's sisters started to pick her up and drag her to a nearby sofa. "Well, obviously because I'm such a big, handsome hunk of man. But seriously, I need a good fight for a badge. Anyone here up to it? Lily, the blue-headed turned to him, anger burning in her eyes. "I will!" "How marvelous. Shall we proceed to the center of the gym then?" "You're in for it, pal." Daisy spoke to her fuming sister. "You aren't going to use....him, are you?" "Yes, him. Dernam here is, like, so dead now." He hadn't the least clue as to what they were speaking of, but he was confident of victory so far. Misty may have been quite skilled, but he doubted her sisters had any real talent. Perhaps.....he may be a problem, but Dernam doubted that it was anything special. They both took positions at their ends, and prepared. Lily was using Misty's Staryu and Starmie, plus......him, whatever that was. This was gonna be good. Lily sent out Staryu, and Dernam released Hitmonlee in the center platform. Magnmite, sensing some high-octane action was about to occur, changed to another SP song, "Will They Die 4 U?" Orders were about to fly. Lily yelled hers, while Dernam remained at a calm, collected, and confident conversation voice. The Staryu attempted a tackle, but was turned back by a Double Kick. Staryu was then ordered to Water Gun, but Lee skillfully chopped his short hands at the water, canceling it out. While Staryu hardened, Hitmonlee took the time to Meditate. Staryu then tried another tackle, but Hitmonlee struck it back with a 3-kick flurry, followed with a roundhouse. Staryu, now fazed, pulled back and started to charge up it's Swift, but Lee had other ideas, and leapt into it, smashing it with a Jump Kick, and it fell fainted into the water. He returned safely to the middle platform. A mutual recall later, and 2 more tosses, put Scyther and Starmie into play. Scyther slammed feet-first into Stamie to open it up, and Starmie quickly righted itself. It retaliated with a Tackle, sending Scyther back, but she was quickly in from again, using her wings to push back. She rushed Starmie and jabbed her twice, akin to a Beedrill's Twineedle. Starmie responded by hardening her shell, trying to protect itself. The order then came for Water Gun, but Scyther easily avoided this by Double Teaming once, twice, trice, until she was mearly several false images flashing about the Starmie, impossible to hit. She finally stopped between Lily and Starmie, and used Takedown. As Starmie flew towards the mid platform, Scyther swiftly flew over her, and Slashed, and it fell at Lily's feet. "Fine then. I didn't want to use this, but i've had this Pokémon for a while, and now you have to fight him!" Lily through her last Pokéball into the pool, and a serpentine shape formed. A Gyarados. Dernam only smiled. He knew something she didn't. He too threw his last Pokéball into the pool, and suddenly there were 2 Gyarados in the water. And his was larger. It was simple. His was female, and female Gyarados were larger than males, probably because of high Magikarp mortality, making the female produce many eggs. That, and his Gyarados had a feministic streak wider than a Snorlax. She absolutely hated males, most likely because of the stereotype that males were bigger, stronger, and more able fighters. She hated male Gyarados with a vengeance. The male only stared at her, and gave a soft growl. This set she-Gyar off. She suddenly flew into a rage, charging the male at breakneck speed. Stunned, the male only stared. When she was close enough, she reared her body back and slammed him to the water. Before he could recover, she bit him just below the neck, picked him up, and whipped his body around like a pathetic rag doll. Dernam simply sat back, not bothering with commands. He wasn't in control. The female threw the male away, and it lifted itself up, only to be head butted down again. She then dove under the surface, and the male attempted to retreat, not listening to Lily, trying to survive. The female burst out of the water in front of him, in full Dragon Rage, and sucked him into the cyclone. After whipping him around thusly, she let him fall, and she reared up on her tail, bringing her full weight down on him in a vicious body slam. This was all coming to a head now, and the song was reaching it's end. She-Gyar stared at the male, screeching bloody murder at him, and he backed down. Lily finally mustered the strength to order a BubbleBeam, but it was a foolish move. As the male shot out the stream of foamy water, it splashed into the females face. In effect, he spat at her. Her eyes burned, and she answered back with a devastating 4-round Hydro Pump into his face. One more line in the song. She backed up, concentrated herself, and blasted the male with her hyper Beam, a technique she only could control when angry beyond belief. It smashed the poor male's forehead, knocking him back. Lily was forced to recall. Victory. Dernam briskly walked over to the blue-headed-and-faced trainer. his hand outstretched, he took the badge she held. He then turned and walked away. Some moaning, and he realized Misty must have come to. Magnemite hovered over his right shoulder, silently taking pictures of the proceeding. Some babbling in the back. Misty: "Whaa....? What happened?" Daisy: "He, um, like, won." Misty: "WHAT?" HOW COULD YOU! I'M GONNA!!!!" Immediately followed by the sounds of a vicious catfight. He wanted to turn, but he needed to find Splash. As he exited the doors of the gym, 6 ran up. "Hey, 6! You miss me?" 6 gleefully jumped into his hands. He set 6 down and patted his head. Then he pulled the collar out. 6 immediately jumped back, trying to act as imposing and fierce as he could, his fur spiking out and his cheeks puffed. Dernam sighed. Natural, he guessed. Then he got an idea. Dernam drew out the Cascade Badge and held it before 6. 6 immediately became enraptured with the aqua, shiny object, his ears sticking up. His gaze followed the badge as Dernam moved it. Then, Dernam quickly pinned the badge to the collar, and held it stretched in front of 6. "You get the point?" Dernam got the collar around 6 without so much as a flinch. 6's expression quickly turned cheery, realizing he had been given a shiny thing to wear. He curled up and attempted to hug himself. Enough silliness, he had to leave now. He could still hear slapping and hair pulling inside the gym. He HAD to get those pictures made soon. He briskly walked away from the gym, 6 at his heels. Hadn't he told 6 to come if something happens? He had, so something might be up, other that 6's own eccentricity. So he beet a brisk pace back to the diner. Along the way, he saw 3 rockets sitting on the side of the road, one with a knife. Weird. One male, 2 females. Dernam thought of how funny it would be to walk into the cafe, an arm around each Rocket girl, just to drive Splash nuts. But a Rocket is a Rocket is a Rocket, and he wanted to avoid them, and the girl Splash had was really no exception. He noticed a sign above them though. 'Pokémon Trainers Ball Tonight!' While he hated dancing(mostly because he couldn't), Splash may be interested, what with his new gf. He'd have to mention it to him, Rockets or no. Besides, if Rockets were to be there, he didn't want to miss the action. Saturday Night's All Right for Fighting, as Elton John would say, even though it ain't Saturday. After yet more walking, he came to Brock's Diner. Dernam quickly went to the back, delivered his letter of resignation, and went to Splash's table. "Back in black. Guess who's got a Cascade Badge?" Splash was flabbergasted. "Uhhmmm, do I know you?" "Boy, do I look that different? I changed clothes, Splash, that's all." "Uh, Dernam?" "That's it, don't wear it out. Anyway, I kick, she sucks, yadayadayada, and I have an idea for you two. On the way back, I saw an advertisement for a Pokémon Trainer's Ball. While I can't dance, I'm sure there will be food and women, so I'm game. You two want to come? It's on me." TBC?......Back in original thread. It's good to be back! Ethan Einhorn -- The Droe .sig V1.2! About: Brown Hair Green Eyes 5'8", 140 lbs Army-style hair cut currently Black Wire rim glasses. 16, Look younger than I am (Trust me, that may be a bitch for me now, but in 40 years, I'll be glad to hear it.) Fan of Pokémon, Zelda, FF before 7(5 rocks!), Metallica, Elton John, Billy Joel, Rob Zombie (Wierd mix, I know), playing front line in PE Football(no joke), driving, Football, and devout Christian. I shall die Sunday, February 11, 2057, cortusy of Deathclock.com To be what we have never been To see what we have never seen To shed the chrysalis and fly, Depart the Earth, kiss the sky, To be reborn, be something new: Is this a dream, or is it true? Can our lives be clearly shorn From a life to which we're born? Are we each a creature free? Or trapped at birth by destiny? Pity those who believe the latter. Without freedom, nothing matters. --The Book of Counted Sorrows ICQ# 32191971 Droe Manred AIM# DroeManred E-mail: Droe50@yahoo.com Music quotes: Baby's black ballon makes her fly. I almost fell into that hole in your life. --Goo Goo Dolls, Black Ballon Every morning there's a halo hangin' from the corner of my girlfriends four-post bed. I know it's not mine but I see if I can use it for a weekend or a one-night stand. --Sugar Ray, Every Morning Dig in the ditches and burn through the witches and slam in the back of my Dragula! --Rob Zombie, Dragula Scartissue that I wish you saw, sarcastic, mister know it all, close your eyes and I'll kiss you. Red Hot Chili Peppers, Scartissue As I was goin' over the court and carriage mountain, I saw the Captain Farrel, and his money he was countin'. I first produced my pistol, and then produced my razor. I said, "Stand and deliver, or the devil he may take ya!" --Metallica, Whiskey in the Jar Surrounded by these colors, I see crimson, black and blue. Locking open doors again, I'm still afraid of you. --Ozzy Osbourne, Vapor Trail(Nowhere to Run) Philidelphia Freedom took me knee high to a man, mmhhmmm, gave me peace of mind my daddy, never had. --Elton John, Philidelphia Freedom Du. Du Hast. Du Hast Mich. --Rammstein, Du Hast I step up to the table in the middle of my life and I take my cards and I check'em twice. i've gotta killer hand, I'm ready to stake my claim, yeah, the cops raid the game. --Rick Springfield, It's always something. My reflection, dirty mirror, no connection to myself. --Smashing Pumpkins, Zero Well I see you through the window and I stop and I stare at you wear nothing but you wear it so well, tied up and twisted, the way I like to be, for you, for me, come crash into me. --Dave Mathews Band, Crash into Me I see a red door and i want it painted black, no colors any- more, I want them to turn black. I see the girls go by dressed in their summer clothes. I have to turn my head until my darkness goes. Paint it Black, The Rolling Stones Time is on my side, yes it is, time is on my side, yes it is. Now you always say that you want to be free, but you keep runnin' back, yes you keep runnin' back, yes you keep runnin' back, too me. Time Is On My Side, The Rolling Stones It's some fantastic I'll never do, some fantastic I know is true, but not as much as my want to be with you. --Bare Naked Ladies, Some Fantastic Was I out of my head, was I out of my mind, how could I have ever been so blind? I was waiting for an indication, it was hard to find. No matter what I say, only what I do, I never mean to do bad things to you, so quiet that I finally woke up, if your sad then it's time you spoke up too. --Fastball, Out Of My Head I gotta .45 at my sde, I gotta make this fucker drive! --Offspring, Bad Habit Book Quotes: Don't fuck with me Todd, because when you fuck with me, your fuckin' with the best. --Stephen king, The Dark Half Quotes of myself: I need more damn middle fingers. I am Phil, ruler of Heck, and Prince of Insufficient Light! I darn you to char slightly in Heck!(Because of that, my friends now call me Phil. Yeehaw) Just remember, even if your not the best at something, do it if you enjoy it. Just remember, if only the best birds in the woods sang, they'd be the only ones that get heard by hunters and shot. Hey, wait a minute...... Lifes a bitch and then you marry one and then you die. Screw this shit and lets get high.(I don't believe that, it's just funny.) Ethan: Shut up, you bitch. Annie: Did you just call me a bitch? Ethan: Yeah..... Teacher: Ethan, would you mind repeating to the class wht you just said? Ethan: Sure, I said Annie is a bitch. (Note: The turning point of my life. I finally break out of the school's nerd stereotype. I don't believe I've been sane since. Ahh, the memories..........) Marcus Quotes: |Help here, Marcus. Tell me your best quotes to be added for the super-sig!| 1: Remove head from ass. 2: Open eyes. 3: Look at world. I remember that one! How could I forget? LS Qoutes: Anyone remember some good ones? I can't off the top of my head. Assorted troll posts: "Marketing kid's products to kids is just plain evil, and should be stopped." - Derek Pierce, Moron Extraordiaire I'm looking fo Dima, Technocunter, etc. Tell me the best! I want a really long sig, damn it! Titles: Scholastic Bowl Keeper of the Evil Pikachu Ruler of the Nerd Herd(but the guy who says that is a $@#&*%#) Fireball Titanium Titanium Ball of Fire(all from the same $@#&*%#) Spunky Droe Manred Phil, ruler of Heck, Prince of insufficient Light Jasper County, Cat of Show, twice. Him 2nd Place, State Scholastic Bowl, 8th grade year Eww He who always seems to get 911 as a girl's number. Mighty crusher of the Hare Krisha Derek Pierce, alongside Follower of Goddish and Pikacharma. Author of Dernam Eord and 6 for PW! End of super-sig V1.2