From: Roberto Perez-Vila
Subject: [PW!] Mystery Science Caravan?
Date: Monday, September 27, 1999 3:20 PM
"...and this is the caravan!" Marvin motions to his rainbow colored
moving home, showing it to Mimic, who is currently in the form of a plain
blue Rattata. Marvin proceeds to remove all the locks placed on the
caravan to keep intruders away.
Mimic stands on his hind legs and squeaks, "What caravan? It car or it
home?"
"Issa car *an* issa home... all at tha same time! Thascool, no?" Famifax
giggles. She is presently in the form of a Meowth she saw during last
night's festival. Her temporary instincts overcome her as she playfully
bats Mimic with her claws.
"Cease and desist!" Xerox, in the form of an orange Growlithe, pulls
Famifax away from Mimic.
Mimic sheds a tiny sweatdrop, "Mimic thank Xerox."
"There we go!" Marvin unlatches the final security measure on his
caravan, and slides the door open, revealing the colorful interior.
Marvin enters first, followed by Famifax, Xerox, Mimic, and Bozo the Mr.
Mime. The magician points to different parts of the caravan, explaining
them as he does, "Over there's the boxes I use for my major illusions,
and that's a trunk full of goodies, that's my bed, over there's the
costume racks, and this is my green bean bag chair. I sit in this chair
when I watch the TV set up across from it. Speaking of which, I haven't
channel surfed in a while..."
Bozo and Famifax both wander into the clothing racks for different
reasons. Bozo because he wants privacy to practice his miming and act,
and Famifax to try out some new accessories. Xerox, still a Growlithe,
leaps onto the single bed in the room. Her current novel, 'Pokemon Farm'
is resting there, and she opens it with her mouth. Mimic transforms into
a Pidgey and flies onto the bed. He perches right next to Xerox, watching
her as she reads.
Marvin grabs his remote control, falls into his bean bag chair, and turns
on the TV. His eyes light up when he sees the program that's on this
particular morning, "Yeah! It's Jynx: Warrior Pokemon! That's one of my
favorite shows!"
Just as the leather-clad Jynx throws her round Kabuto-like killing
thingie to maim her opponent...
Adrian Tymes wrote:
> "We interrupt this program to bring you a special bulletin.
Marvin sighs, "Aww man! Jynx was about to defeat the evil warlord
Giovannicus and save the village of Virudion."
Mimic looks impressed. He asks, "Marvin find all out by watch one second
of show?"
"Uhhhh... No... of course not. It's a repeat, of course!" Marvin blushes,
trying to hide his secret obsession.
> "Replicus, the giant ditto who battled Protopticon yesterday morning,
> has issued a rematch challenge to Protopticon.
Xerox looks up from her novel, "A giant Ditto named Replicus?
Intriguing."
Marvin tilts his head, "Protopticon? That sounds like some sort of
diarrhea medicine."
> In order to avoid
> potential harm to bystanders that, he says, 'forced me to pull my
> punches,' the rematch will happen equidistant from Mount Moon, Cerulean
>
> City, and the Rocket Bottle..."
"Pull my punches? Who talks like that?" Marvin chuckles, then pulls out a
few wooden wands, "Well, I would be performing a magic trick right now,
but there are just so many audience members that I have to whittle my
wands!"
"Mimic have idea who talk like that." Mimic places all his attention on
the special bulletin on the TV.
> "...errm, the D.C.B.F.H.(E.F.). Replicus has stated he will arrive at
> the battle zone in a few hours and wait for his challenger. When asked
>
> why he did not pick a specific time, Replicus denied knowledge of his
> opponent's schedule.
"His opponent should take Protopticon - that way he'd never be off
schedule again!" Marvin raises a bottle of pink medicine from the floor,
and displays it on the palm of his hand with a selling smile.
Xerox mutters, "Replicus' opponent *is* Protopticon. Have you not been
paying attention to the news, master? They haven't really told us what
Protopticon is yet, but I am quite sure it is not diarrhea medicine."
> Apparently, Replicus intends to wait for possibly
> up to several days.
Marvin gasps, "You're right, Xerox, Protopticon isn't diarrhea medicine!
Protopticon is constipation medicine!"
> While he denies rumors that the vague schedule is
> intended to prevent this from becoming a media event that news crews
> can
> schedule around, our crews will be standing by in any case."
Xerox growls at the television, "Foolish media! If Replicus is who I
think he is, the news crews will be standing by, at first... then they
will be falling by... then dying by... then after death, being torn a new
lower orifice by..."
> The picture shifted to a clearing in the forest, as viewed from near
> the
> top of a tree. Porygons with cameras strapped to them could be seen in
>
> all the nearby trees; the view was presumably from another such.
> Occasional flashes of grey could be seen, but these glimpses offered no
>
> clue as to their origin.
Marvin starts moving his finger around, pretending to count all the
Porygon shown on the screen, "So I guess that Pokemon camera crew is
worth six trillion, nine hundred and twenty two billion, two hundred and
sixty four million, five hundred and twenty three thousand, eight hundred
and seventy nine Pokebucks... and seventeen Pokecents."
Xerox nods as-a-matter-of-factly, "It is a shame that Replicus and
Protopticon are going to mercilessly destroy them all, while so many
trainers out there do not have a single Pokemon to train each day of
their lives. For only eighty Pokecents a day, you can support a
struggling Pokemon trainer who cannot afford a single Pokeball..."
> "Depending on when the fight actually takes place, we may be able to
> interrupt programming to bring it to you, our viewers. If we can not,
> we will at least alert you when it happens. Either way, live coverage
> will be available, once the event starts, on our Web site at..."
"Dubba You Dubba You Dubba You SUCK Dot, Yakko, and Wakko too!" Famifax
struts out of the clothing racks, a well endowed teenage human girl with
brown hair and large green eyes, wearing a blue midriff and a black
skirt.
Marvin murmurs something when 'Jynx: Warrior Pokemon' comes back on,
since they are already showing the credits.
"That was not a very informative broadcast." Xerox says, stretching out
on the bed next to Mimic the Pidgey. She continues, "We do not know the
true identity of either Replicus or Protopticon. All we do know is that
Replicus is a Ditto. A giant Ditto. That just seems too much like...
Well, I'd rather not say it, lest he comes to rip us all to shreds."
-Marvin