From: wonkycyber
Subject: [PW!] Nurip's Savior, What a Weirdo!
Date: Wednesday, September 29, 1999 5:54 PM
Pokewars! Nurip's Savior, What an IDIOT!
By wonkycyber, the Rider of Lugia
"Huh…?" Nurip moaned, waking up. He was being held by some creep in blue
tights. "Gack! Hentai!"
Nurip flipped and kicked the man in the face.
"Huh?!" The man rubbed his chin, his red cape flowing. Reaching down towards
his belt, he pulled out Nurip's sword. "I saved you, weirdo."
"I'm not the weirdo." Nurip facefaulted, looking at the straaaange man in
front of him. The guy was dressed in dark blue tights, being held up by a
silver belt. His wristbands were silver as well. The guy's dark brown hair fell
to his lower neck.
"Why do you attack me?" The man stepped near Nurip. Nurip backed up,
frightened. "I am not here to harm you. I picked you up off the streetside. I'm
a superhero… drumroll please…"
"You are… strange." Nurip backed away further, holding his sword out. "Get
away!"
"The destruction of the world… I shall avert it…
Life is a game, how do you play your moves…?
Evil is the wrong way, prepare yourself. ..
To make the world blue, and have happiness abound…
Get ready, forces of darkness, because…
The Wonkycyber and Team Wonky is here!"
Nurip took the time it took Wonkycyber to give his speech and ran off, jumping
from rooftop to rooftop.
A few hours later…
"Nurse Joy!" Nurip cried, running in the Pokemon Center "Please heal my
Pokemon!" His pokeballs spilled on the table
"I'll get on it right away." Joy took the Pokeballs and put them on a tray.
Meanwhile…
"I can't simply let him get away." Wonkycyber stood on top of a building. "I
must go make sure he's all right!"
"Perrrr…" Wonkycyber began to pet Peru-Peru, his Persian. "I'll find him."
Back at the Pokecenter…
"Nurse Joy, what's wrong with the Hitmonchan?" Nurip wondered, toying with his
new black cloak. "When I found it, it was wearing this cloak. It's clothes are
a shambles, and it hasn't any boxing gloves…"
"Well, I've been looking at it, and it seems to know 'Mega Kick'..." Joy
explained, chewing on a piece of hair in thought "Many Karate trainers find
Hitmonchans who use kicking-powers dishonorable. It has been ceremonially
stripped of it's gloves. If you had not caught it when you did, it may very
well have killed itself…"
"Ah. So… what should I do? It'll get hurt without it's gloves…"
"It must take gloves by itself. You may purchase the gloves for him, but he
cannot take them until he feels he deserves them. Do not force him to wear
them." Joy continued chewing her hair "Hitmonchan have a peculiar honor system.
It's best not to interfere."
"I see…" Nurip took out the Hitmonchan's pokeball, and released him.
"Hitmonchan, I dub you… Disono…"
"Monchan?" The Hitmonchan looked at Nurip, it's eyes closed, bandages all
about it. Nurip didn't really see how badly the Hitmonchan was hurt before.
"Hitmon." The Hitmonchan was sucked back inside it's pokeball.
"Ah. I see…" Nurip sighed "What moves does it know?"
"Hmm…" Joy looked at her computer "It knows Comet Punch, Counter, Agility, and
Mega Kick."
"Thanks. Are the rest of my pokes alright?" Nurip wondered, tossing a coin in
the air. When it landed, he saw a Jigglypuff handing it to him. He grimaced.
"Yes. Have a nice day!"
"Bye!" Nurip forced a smile, and chased the Jigglypuff outside. After he left
the center, his sword slid from it's sheath. "You're mine."
"Puff?" The Jigglypuff backed away in fear "Jiggly?!"
"Puff.." Nurip laughed menacingly "Get ready."
"PUFFFFF!!!!" The Jigglypuff ran into an alley. Nurip followed.
It had hit a dead end. There was nowhere to turn. It looked up at Nurip,
wide-eyed in fear. It was so cute, so helpless. It couldn't hurt anybody. All
it wanted to do was sing… a large, cute tear fell from the frightened
Jigglypuff's eye. It quivered in fear. It still had a career singing to leave.
It couldn't die now…
Nurip looked at the creature. How could he harm the innocent creature? It was
so cute, so helpless… couldn't hurt anybody… what kind of life was he leading?
Why was he doing it? It was so cute… so helpless…
The Jigglypuff's pain-filled agonizing scream could be heard for miles.
"The destruction of the world… I shall avert it…
Life is a game, how do you play your moves…?
Evil is the wrong way, prepare yourself. ..
To make the world blue, and have happiness abound…
Get ready, forces of darkness, because…
The Wonkycyber and Team Wonky is here!"
"You again…" Nurip growled, sliding his blade out of the Jigglypuff's corpse.
"Hahaha… I'm ready for you, queer."
"Queer?" Wonkycyber glared, his glasses reflecting light "I find you
offensive. What you have done is simply wrong. Pokemon don't deserve to die!"
Wonky jumped down off of the spotlight he was standing on. "Have at you!"
"Hmph." Nurip growled. "I'll show you. Marinya, go!"
"Neru-Neru, go. For justice…!"
"MEOWTH!"
"PERSIAN!"
"Yowth…" The Meowth glared at it's Persian opponent. The Persian gave a
hissing laugh, and slashed Meowth. Blood dripped from the scratchcat's face.
"Marinya, Double Team!"
"Neru-Neru, Double Team Wonky!"
Marinya became two bleeding, enraged Meowths, flying at the Persian. Neru-Neru
became two flying Persians.
"Huh?" Nurip was confused, watching that "What the hell?"
"Double Team Wonky…" Wonkycyber confessed "Is fairly strange."
"You are strange. Marinya, Slash!"
Marinya jumped as high as it could, but it couldn't hit the flying Persian. It
landed on it's feet, growling.
"Marinya can't hit it!" Nurip growled "Marinya, return! You try… Disono!"
"Monchan…" The Hitmonchan sighed as it came out "Hit-mon-chan…"
"Ha." Wonkycyber laughed "It has no will to fight, for it's fight is not for
love and justice. Neru-Neru, Slash it."
"Mon-chan…" Disono wearily backflipped and Countered, knocking out the
Persian. "Hitmon…"
"Try this, then. Go, Phisci!" Wonkycyber glared, hurling out another Pokeball.
"For the sake of goodness, you will be defeated. The dead Jigglypuff will be
avenged! I swear to ANDREW!"
"Ji." A strange Jigglypuff popped out. It's hair was mussed, and it wore thick
glasses. In one hand, it held a pointer. It wasn't cute at all. "Pu, Li."
"Popem, kill." Nurip growled with pure hatred as he tossed out Popem "Your
Jigglypuff won't escape alive."
"Phisci, use your Lecture to put it to sleep. It destroyed on of your kind…!
He cannot be allowed to walk freely."
"Ji ji, gil gil, lee, pu pu." Phisci lectured Popem. "Ji gi, li pu, uf uf."
"BEEDRILL!!!!!" The Beedrill resisted the lecture and struck the Jigglypuff
with it's Twineedle. "DRRRILL!"
"Puff…" The Jigglypuff stumbled and collapsed, a bleeding hole in it's side.
"Ji gi…" It's blue glasses tumbled across the floor.
"You are rather violent." Wonky glared at Nurip "Perhaps if you were blue
you'd be peaceful…"
"Huh?" Nurip placed his sword in front of him, confused "What are you talking
about?"
"Blue blue blue blue…" Wonkycyber began to chant "Paint the world blue, and it
shall be happy. Such is the will of ANDREW."
"Gack!" Nurip screamed "Disono, knock him out!"
Disono hopped down wearily and punched Wonkycyber. Wonky stumbled about,
wheezing hard.
"Rope of Justice, I choose… you…" He hurled a pokeball, and an Ekans flew out.
"EKKKAAAAANNNSSS!!!" Rope jumped at Disono, using it's Glare. Disono froze,
and was hit by a Screech.
"Kans kans!" Ekans used it's Bite attack on Disono, and proceeded to Wrap it.
"Eeeee---KANS!"
"Monchann…" The Hitmonchan fainted, putting up little struggle.
"Disono…!" Nurip growled, "Koi-chan, you up to it?"
"KAAAAARPPPP!!!!" Koi-chan flew at the Ekans, landing on it. Rope flailed
about, but the Magikarp trapped it, rendering it incapable of attacking. "Karpi
magi karp."
"Hahahaha." Nurip laughed "What are you going to do now? Ha ha."
"You cannot win. Xai-Ber, your turn. Justice always wins." Wonkycyber hurled a
pokeball at Nurip, a Porygon flying out.
"Listen, and listen well, Nurip. Now...You have truly gone too far. If there is
anything I hate more than you, it is evil. You are truly evil... I just wish I
was not as merciful as I am...You would have already been dead if I was not as
merciful as I am."
"Try me." Nurip growled. "Koi-chan, Tackle it!"
Koi-chan tried to Tackle the Porygon, but was struck with a Psybeam.
"Karrrrppppp…"
"Pory Pory pory!"
"Koi-chan, come back! Veri-QT! You try!"
"FAIRY!!!" Veri-QT popped out, Disabling the poor Porygon. It then proceeded
to Seismic Toss and Double Slap it into submission.
"Pooorri…" Xai-Ber began to hack and cough, and became a glowing ball of
energy, flying into Wonky's pokeball.
"One more chance…" Wonkycyber growled "The Avenger, it's up to you! For our
honor!"
"Frrrreeee…" The Avenger, a blue caped Butterfree, flew out. "Buttterrrfreee…"
"Avenger, try a Stun Spore." Wonky screamed, trying to gain an advantage.
"Paralyze him! We'll take him in to the Police! Justice demands it!"
"FREEEEEEEEE!" The Butterfree Stunspored Stunspore after Stunspore after
Stunspore. "Butterrrrfreee!"
"Veri-QT!, try to use your telekinetic powers to reflect the Stunspores!"
"CLLLEEE-FFFAAIRRRYYY!!!" "BUUUTTTERERERFREEE!!!"
The Stunspore went wild, being hurled all about by the Telekinesis. Both
Clefairy and Butterfree were paralyzed. To Nurip's delight, so was Wonky.
"Hahaha." Nurip laughed, spitting in Wonkycyber's face. "Looks like a draw.
I'll get you next time we meet. I am Nurip Eideid, The Hunter of Jigglypuff."
He pressed his sword against Wonkycyber's throat.
"And next time you come after me, lose the tights, queer."
Nurip returned his pokes and donned his black cloak. Slowly and dramatically,
he sheathed his blade. All in all, he thought it was a pretty dramatic exit.
With a bang from a Flash Bomb, Nurip was gone.
To be continued?
________________________________
/ The Great Almighty ANDREW \
| The wonkycyber and Rider of Lugia |
|http://zap.to/wonkypage -GOT WONKY? |
|__________________________________ |
Behold my horrible ANSII art!