From: Karnivax
Subject: [PW!] Top of the Heap
Date: Monday, September 20, 1999 11:34 AM
Kent Brockman: "This just in. A Pokémon fight is in progress in
downtown Indigo Plateau. Early reports indicate - and this is *very*
preliminary - that one of the fighters is a giant dinosaur/preying
mantis hybrid. [to off-camera aide] Do we have a source on
this? ...Uh-huh...a bunch of drunken frat boys... All right, I could
use some names. ...'I.P. Freeley'..."
--TOP OF THE HEAP--
Part 1
by Karnivax
Jessica Sullivan sat in relaxation next to the locked entrance to
the Pokémon League Headquarters, while her zealously protective
Scyther, Atropos, vigilantly stood guard next to her and watched like a
hawk for any possible threats while holding Torrasque's pet Pikachu,
Cathode, close to her body. Though her Scyther instincts had been
mostly overwritten by Bill's "consciousness-dubbing" technology,
Atropos had managed to retain a sort of hive mentality. Jessica was
close enough to being a fellow Scyther that Atropos viewed her as a
Scyther matriarch of sorts, and therefore Atropos dedicated her life to
preserving Jessica's. Oddly, such hive mentality was not exclusive to
hive-building Pokémon.
As Jessica watched Atropos's diligent patrolling, she considered
getting up and scanning the vicinity with Ermac the Porygon to see if
there were any Pokémon around that were worth catching. She was in
need of a rock or ground Pokémon for her team. But at the same time
she started to wonder if she was missing anything back home in
Cerulean. She took out her pocket calendar and checked to see if she
had made note of any important events that month.
She had checked off one date that month, and she had not done so
for any particularly exciting reason. It was just her way of knowing
exactly what day that that little event that happened like clockwork
every month of her life was going to happen. She looked at the date
that the event was supposed to occur on.
Jessica was surprised to find that it was supposed to have
happened already that month. Two days ago, in fact. But it had not.
There was an uneasy silence for just a few moments as the
significance of that fact dawned on Jessica. She made the unsettling
connection between the minor event's failure to happen and the single
bacchanalian night she had spent in Viridian City more than a month
ago. _Holy mother of Goddish...I...I can't believe it..._ she
mentally gasped. _If this means what I think it means, then...I'm..._
Her calendar slipped out of her hand. She did not know whether to be
joyous or frightened.
Meanwhile, Kyle was busy exploring the lair of the Elite Four's
leader. The room was almost sickeningly clean, with shiny marble
floors and a designated Pokémon arena that was clearly marked in bright
white tape. At each of the room's four corners was an ornately-
sculpted stone pillar. The room had various Pokémon paintings and
tapestries hung on the wall. Short pillars on which ancient pottery
and ceramicware stood were placed along the floor outside the
battleground. All of the works of art were well-protected by
futuristic forcefields, which not only prevented larceny but also
protected the works from damage by errant Pokémon attacks. The ceiling
had what looked like a small rotunda in the center; the rotunda was
decorated with stained-glass windows that splashed the arena below with
several different colors of light. Suspended from the rotunda was the
complete skeleton of a prehistoric Aerodactyl.
As Kyle took his place on the battlefield, a blast of smoke
appeared on the opposite side of the room, and started billowing
outward until it had filled up the arena. Kyle gagged as a little bit
of the smoke entered his lungs. Staring into the ephemeral cloud, Kyle
could see the silhouette of a man about his size now at the other side
of the designated battleground.
When the smoke cleared, the man that could only have been the
leader of the Elite Four shot Kyle a dubious glance. The man looked to
be in his thirties. He had deep brown eyes and spiky black hair which
stood straight up like some Akira Toriyama character. He had a long
black cape draped over his whole body. "I watched your performance on
the security cameras," the man pointed out to Kyle. "You won against
Lorelei only because the gods seemed to be smiling on you. Your
triumph against Bruno was merely the result of an Elite Four member who
has evidently lost his way. Your defeat of Agatha came only because
she let her intense frustration from seeing that legendary Gengar on
someone else's side get the better of her."
"Did I sense a tone of jealousy there? If I didn't know better,
I'd say you're intimidated by my skill," Kyle shot back. He liked to
rile enemy trainers up every once in a while by bruising their egos.
He found that the typical trainer was much easier to defeat when their
judgment was obfuscated by rage.
"Intimidated? By you?!" the man laughed. "At first you were
just a lucky kid...and that was only two strikes against you. But now
you've shown me that you're an arrogant lucky kid. You've struck
yourself out." With that, the man threw off his cape. His clothing
consisted of what looked like a tan bulletproof vest with a green long-
sleeved shirt underneath, a belt with six Pokéballs, jeans that
appeared brand-new, and black boots. "If you can't fight a trainer
battle using training prowess alone, you'll never make it past me," the
man noted. "For I am Lance...leader of the Elite Four, master of
dragon Pokémon, man who has no need whatsoever of fortuity."
"Yeah, yeah. Are you going to fight me, or were you just planning
to squash me with that giant ego of yours?" Kyle caustically queried.
"The battle will be four against four," Lance snarled. "I suggest
you take notes during the match...by watching me in action, you will at
last learn what skill truly is!" Lance readied a Pokéball in his right
hand. "Seadra! Assume battle mode!" Lance shouted, as he tossed the
Pokéball into the battlefield. The Pokéball opened to release a blue
Pokémon which closely resembled the species of seahorse known as
the 'sea dragon.'"
"Cloyster, ice this little blue bottom-feeder!" Kyle called out,
as he unleashed Seaclamp.
Before Seaclamp opened his shell, he asked nervously, "Cloyssster?"
"Sea! Dra sea!" came the angry-sounding reply from the enemy
Pokémon.
Seaclamp opened his shell all the way, and saw the diminuitive
Seadra bouncing up and down in front of him. "Cloys - s - s -
ster..." he snickered, as he had no fear of water Pokémon that were
smaller than him.
"Seadra, Smoke Screen," Lance commanded right away. Seadra took a
deep breath and exhaled a dense black cloud of smoke from its hose-like
snout. While Seaclamp struggled to find his opponent, Lance told
Seadra to use Bubble. Seadra blew a large bubble from its mouth which
lazily floated toward Seaclamp and exploded violently upon contact with
his core. Seaclamp spun his core around. The Bubble had not done much
damage at all, but it had made Seaclamp slightly dizzy.
"Spike Cannon!" Kyle shouted. Without even trying to lock on to
his target, Seaclamp rifled off a series of exploding Spike Cannon
shots. Seadra was able to dodge most of them; as they were poorly-
aimed. But eventually one blast struck Seadra, and he fell over.
"Agility," Lance quickly ordered. Seadra briefly started glowing,
then it got up and darted around the arena at amazing speed, easily
avoiding Seaclamp's subsequent Spike Cannon blasts. Seadra got in
close enough that he was able to poke one of Seaclamp's eyes with his
spiny fins, partially blinding Seaclamp.
"Cloysss!!!" Seaclamp wailed, as the eye that had received the
poking started to swell up a bit. Kyle was not sure what attack to
call for next.
"Seadra, Hydro Pump," Lance barked. Seadra stood in one place in
front of Seaclamp, then gathered energy and shouted out its name. A
huge waterspout appeared on the floor and blasted Seaclamp straight up
into the air. The scared Cloyster crashed back down with a deafening
THUD.
"Quick, Seaclamp, use Aurora Beam!" Kyle said. Seaclamp rapidly
charged up and fired an Aurora Beam at Seadra, but Seadra jumped out of
the way. Seaclamp tried again and missed, then again, and again.
Seadra was simply too fast.
"Your Cloyster is no doubt beginning to tire," Lance
scoffed. "Seadra, Bubble." As the swift Seadra leaped from side to
side dodging Aurora Beams, he tagged Seaclamp with exploding Bubble
after exploding Bubble. Seaclamp took the punishment quite well, but
after a while he ran out of Aurora Beam power and had to stop
firing. "Now Hydro Pump again," said Lance, taking the opportunity.
Seadra paused in front of Seaclamp and started to gather energy a
second time.
"Hit it with Ice Beam while it's standing still!" Kyle yelled.
Seaclamp frenetically pointed the barrel of his Spike Cannon at Seadra
and before Lance could call for Agility, Seaclamp hit Seadra with an
Ice Beam and froze the sea dragon to the floor. "Seadra's helpless!
Use your Spike Cannon again!"
"Counter with Smoke Screen!" Lance cried. But it was too late.
The Smoke Screen did nothing to prevent Seaclamp from pummeling the
immobilized Seadra with a barrage of explosive Spike Cannon missiles.
When the blasts cleared, Seadra was flat on the floor and was coughing
up puffs of black smoke.
"Dra..." he wheezed, before passing out.
Lance withdrew Seadra. "Don't congratulate yourself yet,
kid...that was my weakest Pokémon. Aerodactyl, crush this miserable
bivalve!" Lance wound up and threw a Pokéball into the battlefield,
and out came the prehistoric avian that Kyle knew all too well.
"Aeeerooo!" the flyer screeched, as it waddled toward Seaclamp.
This Aerodactyl had a voice that was slightly higher than Grendel's.
"You said you were skilled!" Kyle laughed at Lance. "And yet
you're using a rock and flying-type Pokémon against a water and ice-
type!"
"Type is no substitute for combat experience! You would do well
to write that down!" Lance snapped.
"That would be like writing down 'two plus two equals seven,'"
Kyle responded. Even though he secretly agreed with Lance, Kyle kept
up the role of devil's advocate to try and make Lance lose his
cool. "Seaclamp, Ice Beam!" Seaclamp then launched an Ice Beam at
Aerodactyl. However, Aerodactyl got out of the way of the blast so
quickly and easily that it looked like he had teleported. Seaclamp
sweatdropped. The confidence he had gained from defeating Seadra was
fading fast.
"Wing Attack," Lance commanded. Aerodactyl took to the air and
then slashed at Seaclamp with both of his wings at the same time.
Seaclamp was starting to look a little punch-drunk.
"Keep trying the Ice Beam!" Kyle shouted. Seaclamp desperately
tried to score even a glancing blow upon Aerodactyl with the slow-
moving Ice Beam, but it was hopeless. Aerodactyl continued diving down
on Seaclamp and chipping away at him with Wing Attacks.
After Seaclamp ran out of Ice Beam energy, Kyle told the Cloyster
to try Clamp. Seaclamp lunged over and over at the fast-flying
Aerodactyl, trying to crush the avian by pinching it in his shell. The
attack was even more useless against the agile Aerodactyl than Ice Beam
had been.
"Aerodactyl, Bite." With that, Aerodactyl opened his massive maw
wide and bit hard into Seaclamp's now-closed shell. The winged beast's
teeth punched right through Seaclamp's external armor. Then, showing
an amazing feat of strength, Aerodactyl lifted Seaclamp into the air,
holding the Cloyster with his teeth only. He then proceeded to slam
Seaclamp against the floor repeatedly. By the time Aerodactyl let go
of Seaclamp, the Cloyster had fainted.
"You should have listened to me," Lance grunted.
Kyle recalled Seaclamp. _Wonderful...only two Pokémon left. But
as long as I've got my trump card, I think I'll be okay._ Wanting to
save his so-called trump card for last, Kyle sent out Thanatos.
Thanatos was not even given enough time to play a sound bite on his
guitar. Right off the bat, Lance called for Wing Attack. Aerodactyl
rushed at the black Gengar and gave him a backhand slap with one wing,
knocking the scourge of Lavender Town dangerously close to the arena
boundary.
"Go straight to Hypnosis, then use Psychic and push him out of
bounds!" Kyle ordered. It was a cheap way to win, but Kyle had to get
the most out of Thanatos's dangerously low level of health so his best
Pokémon, Torrasque, would be in perfect shape for when Lance sent out
his ultimate Pokémon. Thanatos pulled out his guitar, then jumped to
one side as Aerodactyl tried to hit him with another Wing Attack.
Thanatos played "Enter Sandman" so fast that his guitar nearly caught
on fire. Aerodactyl started to slow down the second he heard the awful
sound, and then he collapsed to the floor. His eyes closed gently.
Lance frowned, as it seemed evident that Aerodactyl had become a lost
cause.
Thanatos mustered up all of his remaining psychic strength while
Aerodactyl slept, then gave the prehistoric beast a mighty telekinetic
shove, pushing him clear out of the arena. "Aerodactyl is
disqualified!" Kyle noted with relish.
"Very well, if that's how you want to play it..." Lance growled.
He beamed Aerodactyl back into his Pokéball, then immediately tossed
out another Pokéball. "Gyarados, let us see what this legendary Gengar
is made of!" Thanatos gasped audibly as the Pokémon that now stood
before him was a towering, twenty-five foot-long fish that looked like
an Oriental dragon.
Thanatos's awe at the sight of the massive Gyarados prevented him
from getting the first strike. Lance commanded, "Gyarados, use a
diagonal Hydro Pump and blast that cloud of swamp gas out of the arena!"
Gyarados let out an earsplitting roar of "GYAAAAARRRRR!!!" just
to scare Thanatos into remaining still. Then a gigantic diagonal
waterspout sprung up right next to Thanatos. The blast did not send
Thanatos straight up; rather, it launched him off to the side, sending
him out of bounds. But even if Thanatos had somehow managed to stay
within the boundaries, it would not have mattered. Thanatos's health
was so low that the Hydro Pump attack knocked him out before he even
hit the ground.
Lance grinned diabolically. "You can pull that disqualification
trick on me once, kid. But never, ever twice." He spun Gyarados's
Pokéball on one index finger. "Now, if I'm not mistaken, you only have
one Pokémon left that hasn't fainted already. And that's unfortunate
for you, because you still have to defeat two of my Pokémon. You
really should have brought some Max Revives with you..."
"Point duly noted...and ignored," Kyle retorted. "Scyther, I
choose you!" From Kyle's final Pokéball came the Pokémon that many an
enemy trainer had referred to as "more dinosaur than bug" - the mighty
Torrasque.
--TOP OF THE HEAP--
Part 2
by Karnivax
The battle-scarred Scyther took a quick look up at the gigantic
serpent he was now facing. He did not seem the least bit
intimidated. "Look, Torrasque," Kyle went on, "I know I said I
wouldn't make you fight any more, but, as you can see -"
"Say no more," Torrasque interrupted, as he took a fighting
stance. "I'll take care of it, Kyle. But I expect a little gift in
return after this is all over." Lance watched with interest, having
never before seen a Pokémon that was able to speak English without use
of a translator.
"Name it, Torrasque."
"Kyle, you know how, a while ago, you promised me that one day
you'd pay for that operation to replace my boring old organic scythes
with stainless steel ones?"
"Consider it done," Kyle replied.
"I think you're getting a little ahead of yourself," Lance snorted
at Torrasque. "Even if Gyarados doesn't, my last Pokémon will crush
you like the miserable little bug you are."
"If this battle were under normal circumstances, you might be
right," Torrasque very calmly replied. "But hey, this time I'm
properly motivated to win. And that means that unless your Pokémon are
packing a few nuclear warheads, I'm about to tear them each a new
cloaca."
Lance was not really listening to Torrasque's trash-talk. Lance
was more interested in the fact that Torrasque looked decidedly like a
miniature dragon. "Note to self," Lance said quietly. "Go to Safari
Zone and catch Scyther." Then he said out loud, "Gyarados, Hyper Beam!"
Gyarados closed its eyes and started to take in a considerable
amount of hydrogen. So Kyle quickly commanded, "Torrasque, counter
with Hyper Beam!"
Torrasque jammed his talons into the floor to brace himself, then
started taking in hydrogen as well, at a rate that was nearly twice as
fast as Gyarados's. His left scythe started glowing with a
multicolored light as he pointed it in Gyarados's direction. He kept
his left scythe steady with his right.
Then Gyarados opened its giant jaws, and unleashed an earthshaking
beam comparable to a fusion cannon blast from its mouth. Mere
milliseconds later, from Torrasque's left scythe came an even larger
Hyper Beam. The two blasts met, and for a few seconds each beam would
not let the other get past. But Torrasque had an advantage of more
than forty experience levels over the Gyarados. His Hyper Beam easily
overpowered that of the gigantic piscine.
Both Hyper Beams detonated inside Gyarados's mouth. Stunned, the
serpent coughed up a massive fireball and slammed to the ground. Dense
smoke was rising from its nostrils. Torrasque pulled his feet free
from the floor, charged, then attacked Gyarados's giant head furiously
with a series of weak Slashes, making sure that the helpless sea
serpent would not get seriously wounded. Eventually Gyarados blacked
out from Torrasque's assault, and a frustrated Lance had to recall the
very same leviathan that had once bitten off the right arm of infamous
bounty hunter Trent Retwin.
"I have no idea how one such as you managed to acquire such a
powerful Pokémon," Lance said to Kyle, "but it's of little
consequence. With the money I've spent and the T.M.s I've used, a
whole *army* of Scyther could not defeat my last Pokémon!" Lance
grinned as tossed out his fourth Pokéball and summoned the beast inside
it: "Dragonite, exterminate this pest! This time, anything goes!!!"
_Dragonite?!_ Kyle mentally gasped. _Damn it, where's Leviathan
when I need him?_
Lance's Pokéball opened, and a rather angry-looking, winged,
orange, ten foot-tall reptilian beast emerged. Torrasque subtly backed
away from the massive Dragonite. Torrasque had spent a few years of
his life fighting alongside Leviathan, but even when Leviathan was
standing on tiptalons he was hardly five feet tall (Kyle surmised that
Leviathan's miniscule size was the result of a birth defect that had
happened during the course of events that brought Leviathan's egg to
the shore of Cinnabar Island).
Lance's Dragonite did not even wait for an official command. The
legendary monster rushed at Torrasque and gave him a knee-bash in the
chest, taking the wind out of him and causing him to double over. Then
Dragonite hammer-punched Torrasque on top of the head, lifted him up,
then gave him a mighty backhand which sent him on a short airborne trip
toward one edge of the arena. When Torrasque crashed back to the
ground, his head and one of his scythes were crossing a boundary.
"I...I lost?!" Kyle cried, thunderstruck at the thought that he
would have to fight the Elite Four all over again.
"No...as usual, you got lucky," Lance scoffed. "Disqualification
comes only if your Pokémon's entire body is out of bounds."
"In that case...Torrasque, give Puff over there a taste of the
People's Slash!" Dazed, Torrasque got up and shook his head a bit
before approaching Dragonite. Before Torrasque could even start the
People's Slash, however, the Dragonite hit Torrasque in the muzzle with
a right jab and then a left uppercut that launched the Scyther
relatively straight into the air. Dragonite gave Torrasque a powerful
tailwhip before he could even hit the ground, and Torrasque would have
sailed clear out of bounds had he not jabbed his scythes into the floor
in mid-flight.
"Dragonite, Bubblebeam," Lance commanded.
"Drrraaa..." The Dragonite raised one hand skyward, and a large
glowing bubble started to appear just above his hand. When the bubble
reached its maximum diameter, Dragonite launched the projectile at
Torrasque, and the one bubble turned into a chain of four as it flew.
The chain traveled in a predictably horizontal wave pattern, and
Torrasque was able to somersault out of its way. The glowing
Bubblebeam burst against the floor with a resounding POP and a flash of
blue water energy. "Nnnite," Dragonite hissed, scowling at Torrasque.
Torrasque charged Dragonite at full speed this time, but Dragonite
was ready. The giant orange beast went for a left jab to Torrasque's
face...but this time Torrasque tilted his head to one side and dodged
the punch. He crossed his scythes tightly around Dragonite's
outstretched left arm, then, in a display of herculean strength,
Torrasque leaned back and threw Dragonite over his shoulder. The
surprised Dragonite landed flat on his stomach.
Kyle called for the People's Slash as Dragonite was getting up,
but Torrasque did not have time to do the Swords Dance that always
preceded the move. So as Dragonite rose, Torrasque gave him a simple
backhand Slash to the face. The attack did not bring the giant
Dragonite down, but it did leave a bloody gash in his muzzle.
Dragonite winced in agony and pushed Torrasque away with a weak
tailwhip.
"Fire Blast, now!" Lance shouted. Torrasque heard the dreaded F
word, and got as far away from Dragonite as he could without leaving
the arena.
"Gooonnnite!" Dragonite thundered. He put his hands together,
then interlocked his pinkies and lined up his thumbs and index claws,
forming the shape of a pistol with his hands. As Dragonite
concentrated intensely and shouted something in his own language (which
translated roughly to "Fire Blast...IGNITE!!!"), his index claws lit on
fire. Then, very suddenly, Dragonite pointed his index claws at
Torrasque and unleashed a giant, swirling cloud of flame which took on
a vaguely star-like shape as it roared toward Torrasque.
The blast was much too big to avoid completely, so Torrasque held
his wings against his back, ducked into one of the gaps between the
fire-star's lower points, and prayed to Goddish that he would not get
incinerated. The Fire Blast passed over Torrasque and then detonated
like an incendiary when it ran into one of the room's walls.
Torrasque's green scales had been burnt black, but he had not caught on
fire. He silently rejoiced and got up from the floor.
"Ice Beam, then," Lance ordered, while Dragonite still had a range
advantage. Dragonite inhaled deeply, collecting energy. Then he
exhaled with all his might, and a thin blue beam of energy rocketed
from Dragonite's mouth and headed straight at Torrasque. The Ice Beam
was much faster than the lumbering Fire Blast, and Torrasque again did
not get away from the attack unscathed...the beam grazed his left
scythe, and his entire left arm froze.
Supporting his frozen arm with his unfrozen arm, Torrasque
sprinted past a tailwhip from Dragonite and stood in front of
Kyle. "This frozen arm's dead weight," Torrasque said to Kyle. "I
have to ditch it temporarily. Catch!" Then Torrasque slashed off his
own left arm. Kyle caught the frozen Scyther arm as it fell,
preventing it from hitting the ground and shattering.
"Are you out of your mind, Torrasque?!" Kyle cried.
"It'll hurt a lot when my shoulder thaws," Torrasque said. "But
as long as the nerves there are numbed by the ice, I'm keepin' on
keepin' on!" Torrasque jumped out of the way of another tailwhip and
started rattling off what sounded like a segment from an
infomercial: "The Scyther, from Cinnabar Island Laboratories! Made
from space-age preying mantis and dinosaur genes! It slices, dices,
Cuts, Slashes, and even makes Julienne fries! But wait, there's more!
It has removable limbs for eeeeeasy cleaning!" It was then that Kyle
concluded that Torrasque was more than a little delirious.
"Finish that pest off with a Thunderbolt!" Lance yelled.
Dragonite took flight and hovered just above the arena. He raised his
left arm, and the arm sparked and surged with bolts of brillant yellow
energy as a giant pulsating orb of electricity formed in Dragonite's
open left hand. Dragonite wound up, then pitched the electric sphere
like a baseball at Torrasque.
Torrasque brought one blade back as soon as he saw the Thunderbolt
approaching. Then, timing his move with laser-like precision,
Torrasque swung his remaining scythe at the oncoming projectile faster
than the human eye could see...and deflected the bulk of the
Thunderbolt right back at Dragonite. Dragonite was so surprised to see
the Thunderbolt coming back that it never even occured to him to move
out of the way. Torrasque took a more painful shock from the
Thunderbolt than Dragonite did, but in the long run Dragonite was worse
off. He clutched his head in pain and landed on his knees in the
center of the arena, frozen in one place. He had been paralyzed by his
own blast.
"Now would be a good time for the People's Slash!" Kyle shouted.
Torrasque, nearly paralyzed himself, hobbled over to where the helpless
Dragonite knelt. The People's Slash normally involved both scythes,
but this time things had to be a little different. Torrasque did a
lethargic, halfhearted Swords Dance and brought his blade back.
Kyle did not watch Torrasque pull off the People's Slash. Kyle
had released the unconscious Espio and was using Espio's tail-flame to
thaw out Torrasque's severed arm. While Kyle was doing that, he heard
behind him the sound of Torrasque's scythe hitting flesh coupled with a
cry of pain from Dragonite, then the same thing again, then a brief
pause. After that came a loud CRACK, then an even louder cry of pain
from Dragonite, then the whole room shook with an deafening THUD.
After that, there was a vaguely metallic clang from something much
smaller hitting the floor. Finally, Kyle heard Torrasque
mutter, "Goddish damn it...I broke my scythe."
When Kyle turned around, Torrasque was standing with his remaining
blade broken in half, and Dragonite, covered in bleeding slash marks,
lay roughly eight feet away from Torrasque. Dragonite raised his head
slightly, moaned, "Drrraaagonnn..." then blacked out. His head once
again hit the floor.
Lance also looked paralyzed as he withdrew Dragonite. He hung his
head in shame. "I believe I grievously underestimated your skill as a
trainer, Kyle," he admitted. "And I've paid thusly. You've won."
Kyle looked shocked as Lance's words sunk in. Then he started
jumping around and backflipping in midair in a fit of utter
jubilation. "You hear that, Torrasque?! I've won!!! I've WON!!!
I'm...POKÉMON LEAGUE CHAMPION!!! YESSS!!! WAHOOOOO!!!"
"Errr...I hate to precipitate on your mobile congregation, but
you're not the champion just yet," Lance interrupted. "You see, you
still have to defeat the reigning Pokémon League Champion...either Ash
Ketchum or Gary Oak, depending on which one's here today."
Kyle facefaulted, landing flat on his stomach. "All that...and I
still have to defeat *one* *more* trainer?!!!" He got up from the
floor. His face darkened. And then, very calmly, he recalled the
fainted Espio, pulled a tube of glue out of his backpack, glued
Torrasque's broken scythe back together, then popped Torrasque's now-
thawed left arm back into its socket. "You know what? Screw being
Pokémon League Champion!" a frustrated Kyle roared. "I've still
beaten the Elite Four...and really, how many other trainers can brag
about doing that?" He then grabbed Torrasque by one arm and headed for
the door back to Agatha's lair. "Come on, Torrasque. We're out of
here."
Yes, folks, he went all that way for nothin'. But some really
important stories are coming reeeeeal soon. I swear it. ^_^;;;
--K * A * R * N * I * V * A * X--
"Only two things are infinite: the universe and
human stupidity. And I'm not sure about the
former." --Albert Einstein
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