From: Shimarisu <rachel.r@scotland.com> Subject: [PW!] Nisemon Tries for a Badge Date: Thursday, October 07, 1999 1:12 PM Nisemon Tries For a Badge After a time waiting outside the Cerulean Gym, Nisemon was finally waved in by one of the female attendants on the door. It seemed that now was the time for the Ditto's first real League-sanctioned battle. Well, now was the time for Nisemon's first *ever* battle. Perhaps it should have occurred to the Ditto that it might have been a plan to get some fighting experience *before* trying to earn a badge, but reason had never stood in the way of Nisemon's nefarious plans before, why should this time be any different? The Ditto had come to Cerulean Gym after concocting a new scheme to take over the world. This was all concerned with getting to meet Giovanni, and gaining control of Team Rocket. Nisemon didn't know why it had become so important to take over the world, but it was something to do - so why not? And if *anyone* could get to see the organisation's leader if they had all the badges, it seemed obvious to Nisemon that anyone could break into Team Rocket's HQs. If the various infiltration schemes didn't work, then this plan was good backup. So here was Nisemon, and Nisemon was getting a badge. This was a water gym, wasn't it? There were and awful lot of fish about... "Dammit!" Nisemon thought. "There aren't any lady Pikachus here!" The male Pikachu that Nisemon had specifically changed into started to bang its head against the side of one of the tanks, until the Ditto realised that the point of coming here was not to seduce any other Pikachus. Nisemon ceased banging the Pikachu's head against the tank, and instead began the walk up the hallway towards the double doors that led into the main arena. Behind Nisemon, the big crack in the aquarium that had been made by the Pikachu's skull exploded into a tidal wave of salt water and tropical fish, which crashed into the glass on the opposite side of the corridor and somehow managed to create a similar crack there. That crack then proceeded to burst open, dispensing the contents of the other tank into the hallway. It was, to be understated, a fine mess. "I've come to earn a Cascade badge" declared Nisemon, on the other side of the doors and therefore blissfully unaware. "What?" asked Misty. She could hear the sound of water rumbling in the distance. Perhaps it had just got into her ears again, and was flooding her brain... "I said, I've come for a Cascade badge!" yelled Nisemon. "Are you deaf?" "Erm, right, okay little Pikachu. Why don't you go home?" said Misty, who did not understand Pikachu language despite having travelled with one for what seemed like years. "I WANT A CASCADE BADGE!" raged Nisemon, in block capitals this time. Misty watched as the Pikachu shook its backpack at her as if in explanation. A few Pokemon related food products and curatives fell out. The Pikachu scurried about and picked them all up, then crammed them back into the bag, and tied it securely. From this display, anyone could have gleaned that here was a lone Pokemon, yet another in the PW who had decided to earn badges as a trainer rather than serve a human. "I don't get it," said Misty. "ARRRRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHH! Are you totally thick?" Nisemon stamped the Pikachu's foot against the floor, as hard as was possible. Then, after Nisemon had hopped about a bit to futilely ease the pain, something occurred to the Ditto. Hadn't Nisemon planned for this beforehand? Ah, yes! There had been a genius tactic, to resort to if the human failed to understand. The Pikachu bent down and pulled a note out of its bag. And then it scampered over to Misty, and proffered it to her. "I'm supposed to read this note?" asked Misty. "YES!" Nisemon wailed. The Pikachu waved the note in front of her face, as she knelt down and tried to take it. "Stop waving it about, I'm trying to take it," said Misty. Nisemon obliged, so she accepted the note and read the first lines out loud. "'List of Victims'" read Misty. "'Mondo. Stole his jeep, crashed it into mountain. Fun!' Erm, there's a smiley face drawn here, too. It kind of looks like a..." "Not that note, THIS note!" sweatdropped Nisemon, hastily swiping the Victim List from Misty's hands, and replacing it with the intended note in the space of 2 cel shots. "Erm, you want me to read this instead? Okay, here goes... 'Hello, my name is Muhctek Hsa, and I am a Pokemon trainer, only I am not well, honest, and instead of me here is my Uhcakip, sorry, Pikachu who wants to fight you and get a Cascade badge for me, and with that we will take over the world! Sorry, actually we won't do that at all, that was a Joke. Yours sincerely, Muhctek Hsa. PS. Be nice to my Pikachu, and let him win.'" Hah!" scoffed Misty. "I don't let anyone win in this Gym! If you truly want to fight my Pokemon, stand over on the other side of the pool, and we'll see what you're made of!" She ran over to her position on one of the floating platforms on the pool. Nisemon did likewise, or rather not so likewise- running to the other. "Right then, what are you going to choose? Whatever it is, it can't stand against my water Pokemon!" yelled Misty, like the deluded water obsessed fool that she is. "Staryu, I choose you!" Nisemon watched as the starfish pokemon materialised out of Misty's pokeball, and into the air over the pool. It did not fall. It hovered there ominously, like something you ought to be very, very afraid of. The Pikachu shrugged, and cast Thunderbolt on it. It fell into the pool alright... "Um, yeah..." Misty faltered, "Staryu, return! The next one to beat will be... Horsea! I choose you!" "How boring," thought Nisemon, and cast Thunderbolt again. The Horsea passed out before it even hit the water. "Horsea, return! You won't beat this next one! Seel! I choose you!" "PIIII-KAAAAA-CHUUUUU" squealed Nisemon, casting Thunderbolt on the unsuspecting Seel. It, like the others, passed out immediately. "How can this happen?" gasped Misty, failing to understand even the most obvious physics of Pokemon battle, as people from the show are wont. "Okay then, how 'bout this? Dewgong! I choose you!" "Goodnight," Nisemon told the Dewgong, chucking another Thunderbolt at it. Misty glared as yet another of her Pokemon hit zero HP. This was not an even match, and she only had 2 Pokemon left. So she gulped down her nerves and threw a trump card into the arena. "Starmie! I choose you!" went Kasumi. "PIIIIII-KAAAAA-CHUUUUUUUUUUUU!" went Nisemon. "Splash!" went the sound of the water as Starmie hit it at an admirable velocity. "Oh no!" yelled Misty. "All my other Pokemon it seems, are quite conveniently at the Poke-Centre! I'm gonna have to choose... Not that! Not that useless Pokemon!" Psyduck... I choose you," she sighed, as the Pokeball exploded into light. Psyduck materialised over the pool, promptly clamped its hands to its head and fell into the water with a splash. It floated there, looking dizzy. Nisemon observed all this and sniggered. This was just perfect! The Pikachu tactic was working! All it had taken was to find some dumb looking kid with an electric Pokemon, emulate that pokemon and head straight to Cerulean Gym. And what luck! That kid's Pikachu had been equipped with one serious killer of a move. What with Nisemon's high level (Ditto are always high level) and that move, the world was in the Ditto's hands, or the hands of whatever Nisemon was pretending to be at the time! It was ingenious! And now, that STUPID girl had picked a water Pokemon to battle a Pikachu AGAIN! "Sa-yo-na-raaaaa!" Nisemon gleefully yelled at the Psyduck, who, being a pokemon, understood totally. "PIIIIIIII-KAAAAAA-CHUUUUUUUUUU! Thunderbolt again!" But no Thunderbolt came. After that, there was total silence. Nisemon pointlessly looked at the Pikachu's hands as if expecting the answer to appear within them. Then Nisemon clenched the hands together, and tried again. "PIIIIII-KAAAAAAAAAAA-CHUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!" Nothing. Not a jolt. "Oh no!" screamed Nisemon. "I RAN OUT OF PP!" The Psyduck meanwhile, swam slowly and painfully towards the platform where its opponent was stood, which was difficult considering that it had to hold its hands to its head the whole time... "I RAN OUT OF PP!" raged Nisemon. "I had, only 5 PP in the first place! And now I only have Quick Attack and some dumb stat reducers left!" The Psyduck continued to swim towards Nisemon... "I'd use Quick Attack," said Nisemon, "But I can't get off this platform! We are over a POOL! That kid was dumb! What kid of stupid moves has he taught this stupid Pokemon?" The Psyduck reached its goal, and hauled itself out of the water... "No!" screamed Nisemon, "It's me who is the pointless one! Dittos are USELESS! I had only 5 attacks! I have completely failed as a Pokemon!" "Psyduck!" yelled Misty, "Use your Fury Swipes attack now!" "Wha?" Nisemon turned around. "Now wait a minute, I haven't fin..." "WHAP!" The Psyduck bitchslapped the Pikachu across the face. "Hang on…." Nisemon spluttered, "That's not f..." "WHACK!" Psyduck's attack continued, and Nisemon staggered back. The Pikachu keeled over, and fell straight into the pool. "Yah-hoh!" Misty squealed. "I am *so* glad I finally found a use for that Pokemon!" - TBC? - Shimarisu Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/ Before you buy.