From: Roberto Perez-Vila
Subject: [PW!] The Pokemon League?
Date: Monday, October 04, 1999 3:08 PM
"So you're a Pokemon... *and* a trainer? You're... both?" Nurse Joy can't
seem to figure out what's the deal with the talking Slowpoke standing on
the desk before her. He has given her three Pokeballs and ordered her to
"Why is it so very difficult for you to understand, healer?" Luthor
slowly rolls his eyes, "When I asked the useless people in this city full
of useless rocks where I could get my slaves healed, they directed me
here. They told me to look for 'the attractive woman in the nurse
uniform', but since I couldn't find anyone matching that description, I
settled for you."
Nurse Joy frowns, pulling the tray with three Pokeballs away from Luthor,
"You're not cute like other Slowpoke."
"Do you think that the great Luthor is here to amuse you? To be pleasing
to your eyes and ears?" Luthor shakes his head defiantly, "You are
mistaken. Luthor is here to gain the utmost respect from everyone on this
As the Nurse Joy from Pewter City puts the tray full of Pokeballs inside
her special healing machine, she says, "You're never going to gain
respect by being rude and obnoxious. A better way to gain people's
respect would be to become a Pokemon Master by entering the Pokemon
League. I'm sure it would impress everyone if that happened. I remember a
talking Alakazam who tried to do that very same thing, but gave up before
reaching the Elite Four."
"Pokemon League? The Doppler's lackey said that the Doppler was against
this organization." Luthor looks up at a nearby poster that promotes the
Pokemon League, the same poster that Ash Ketchum once viewed for
inspiration. "Then it's more the reason for me to join it. The Doppler
seems to be one of the most heroic super heroes on the face of the earth,
trying to liberate slaves and preach equality amongst Pokemon. This alone
makes him my enemy. Whatever he despises must be deliciously evil."
Luthor smiles at the homing device in his paw, "I'll keep this hero on a
Ding! The sound a microwave makes emits from the healing machine. Nurse
Joy pulls the tray out, and places it in front of Luthor, "Isn't modern
technology great? We used to actually have to take Pokemon out of their
"Apathy is destructive. Fetch me an application form for the Pokemon
League, healer." Luthor commands her. Since Nurse Joy is used to being a
servant of the people and Pokemon, she goes to find an application.
Luthor telekinetically moves his three Pokeballs back onto his belt, one
at a time. He then moves Doppler's homing device into his backpack.
By the time the Slowpoke is finished with his inventory, Nurse Joy
returns with an application and a pen made of slate, "I seriously doubt
you can write, since you don't have opposable thumbs. Would you like me
to fill it out for you?"
"I don't need assistance from the likes of you, human healer!" Luthor
mentally snatches the form away from her. He telekinetically moves the
gray pen onto the form, and starts to write using his mind, grunting from
the difficulty of the feat.
Nurse Joy frowns, "Well then, don't come back looking for any help when
your Pokemon are defeated by Brock."
The pen abruptly falls over. Luthor looks up at Nurse Joy, "Who is
It's Nurse Joy's turn to roll her eyes, "He's the Pewter City Gym Leader.
You're going to have to beat him in a Pokemon match if you want to get a
Boulder Badge. You need a Boulder Badge and seven other Badges to enter
the Pokemon League, not just an application. In fact, most trainers don't
fill out their forms until after they've earned the eight Badges!"
"Then I will follow standard procedure." Since Luthor's psychic powers
are weakening due to overuse, he folds the application before him using
his paws, and places it in his backpack, along with his new official
Pewter City pen. "Tell me where this Pewter City Gym is located. Brock
will stand no chance against my vicious, blood-thirsty army of Pokemon."
As Luthor leaps off the counter and gradually works his way towards the
exit, Nurse Joy wants to find out which 'vicious' Pokemon Luthor has. She
pushes some buttons on her machine to find out which were the last three
Pokemon healed, and she sees the outlines of a Tentacool, a Grimer, and a
Bulbasaur. She sighs, "It looks like the machine's broken again."