From: Sirius <sirius259@aol.comeleon> Subject: [PW!][LEAGUE] *ASH* vs.... some guy named 'Sirius'. Date: Thursday, December 30, 1999 11:38 PM "Hello, and welcome to today's match on the Grass Field, where green trainer Ash Ketchum will battle against red trainer... hmm... 'Sirius' something," said the commentator. "Anyway, I'm Dan and that's Bob." Bob said "hi". "Here comes Ash Ketchum, who has not lost a single match during this competition, and the favorite to win it all. His strategy? He seems to let the opponent get the upper hand for a while, then say, 'oh yeah, use this' and turn the tides with a single hit. It's a tough strategy to beat, that's for sure." "Yes," said Bob, "For sure." Ash entered the stadium to a near-standing ovation from the crowd. He waved to the crowd and smiled, clearly relaxed as he went up to the platform. From the other side of the stadium, Sirius, head bowed, nervously scuttled inside and stumbled onto his platform. "Well, I'm guessing that's Ash's opponent. 'Sirius', was it? That kid must have hippie parents or something," continued Dan. "Now, the trainers will choose their first Pokemon." Ash confidently took a Pokeball from his belt and threw it down onto the arena. "Let's go, Bulbasaur!" "Bulba! Bulba saaaur!" growled Bulbasaur. Sirius paused to think. Nearly all of his Pokemon had an advantage against Ash's Bulbasaur, but it was well-known that that Bulbasaur was capable of beating Pokemon in one hit, advantage or disadvantage. This match had to be finished quickly. He took a Pokeball from his belt. "Aerodactyl, go!" Upon being released, Aerodactyl gave out a hideous screech, rendering everyone in the stadium nearly deaf. The referee took off his shattered glasses and clumsily raised two flags. "Trainers, begin..." he mumbled, as Ash turned his cap backwards for good luck. "Bulbasaur, Tackle!" he commanded. Bulbasaur lunged forward with a fairly weak Tackle, but Aerodactyl was already... airborne. "Hmm... I wonder what to do... Bulbasaur, Leech Seed!" "Bulba!" A seed rose out of its bud. Bulbasaur arched its back to fling it at Aerodactyl. The seed was thrown about two feet into the air, and then it fell back down onto the grass. Eventually, a Pidgey flew by and ate it. "Aerodactyl, Supersonic!" shouted Sirius. Aerodactyl, who was flying circles high about its competition down below, let out a piercing scream even worse than before. "AAAAA-AAA-AAAA-AAAAERO!" Bulbasaur froze, trying to recover, swallowing its own barf while doing so. "Gah... Bob, Bulbasaur is just about done for. There's no way it can recover in time to hit back. Wink wink," said Dan. "Wink wink?" replied Bob. "... never mind." "Buu-uuu-uulbaaaa..." it moaned. "Hang in there, Bulbasaur!" shouted Ash. Sirius snickered. "This match is ours, Aerodactyl. Swoop down and Bite!" Aerodactyl spiraled downward towards Bulbasaur, increasing its speed five-fold while doing so. Bulbasaur regained focus moments before Aerodactyl was about to bite. "Bulbasaur, slap it with a Vine Whip!" shouted Ash. Bulbasaur's vine reached out and slapped Aerodactyl softly across the face. Aerodactyl went to a complete stop and fell down, fainted. Bulbasaur nodded and smiled, victoriously. "Wow!" exclaimed Dan. "A come-from-behind victory from Ash Ketchum! His strategy is working like a charm, while 'Sirius' is proving to be a totally inept trainer." "WHAAA!? WHAT WAS THAT!?" "Ha!" laughed Ash. "You should have known that by being fast, Aerodactyl's defense becomes non-existant." "Huh!? What are you talking about!?" shouted Sirius, from across the arena. "That's not true!" "Well..." stuttered Ash. "Then you should have known that because it used Supersonic, it became 100x as vulnerable to attack!" "What the hell are you talking about, you little piece of shit!?" shouted Sirius in response, furious. "Either way," said Ash, smugly, "your Aerodacytl is fainted." Sure enough, one of the lights on Sirius's side of the board was gone. Sirius, in disbelief, returned Aerodactyl to its Pokeball. "You won't be able to beat THIS one with a little slap, Ash," replied Sirius. "Reis, go!" The Dragonite rose out of her Pokeball as it opened on the grassy field. Once the referee signalled for the match to begin, Reis immediately took control of the match, slamming Bulbasaur without hesitation and grabbed ahold of its vine. "Bulba!" cried Bulbasaur while Reis dragged it across the arena by its vine. "Haha, Reis, Seismic Toss." It was Sirius's turn to gloat. "Bulbasaur, Whirlwind!" shouted Ash, obviously confused. Reis, with a firm grip on Bulbasaur's vine, flew up into the air and flew around in a circle. "Draaaaa!" roared Reis as she flung the helpless Bulbasaur down. It landed with a loud thud. "Bulbasaur, one Razor Leaf ought to do it!" shouted Ash again, oblivious to the fact that his Bulbasaur was done for. Reis gracefully landed back on the ground, cracking her knuckles. "Bulbasaur is out of the match!" stated the referee after examining the unconscious Bulbasaur. "Bulbasaur, Leech Seed!" yelled out Ash again. "Mr. Ketchum," said the referee, impatiently. "The match goes to Sirius. Return Bulbasaur at once. "Bulbasaur... nooo..." sobbed Ash. "I can't... I can't believe you're gone..." "Mr. Ketchum, your Bulbasaur isn't dead. Return it to your Pokeball." "Goodbye, old friend..." "Mr. Ketchum, PLEEASE..." "Wow! A Dragonite! I'm gonna catch it!" "AAARGH!" Narrator: By letting Bulbasaur grow and move on, our young hero may have grown himself. Now, will Ash be able to capture a Dragon Pokemon and defeat the evil Psychic Pokemon trainer, Sirius? Stay tuned next time to find out! TBC.... Sirius "Before I can return your children, you'll have to complete a course called "Family Skills". It teaches parents to listen to their-" "Communication, gotcha." "But it's important to-" "Listen, yes, I know." "But there's more to it than-"