From: RobfromVoid <RobfromVoid@prodigy.net> Subject: [PW!] Robert Gets Out of Jail Free Date: Friday, December 17, 1999 2:00 PM "Oh, Rilli, I'm so happy that everything's back to normal!" Robert is laying down on a bed in the Saffron City Pokemon Center, hugging his girlfriend who is next to him, "Sabrina stopped playing pranks on us and 'We're on the Road to Viridian City'!" Mithril-rama huffs and says, "You'd better not sing that stupid song as we go there, though... Do you know how many people have used 'On the Road to Viridian City' as the title for their trip to Viridian in the past few months? It's sad and alarming..." "As the title? What does that mean?" Robert's eyes go wide, "Uh oh, it looks like Sabrina might've played a prank, after all." Mithril-rama shakes her head, "I don't think so. We would've noticed by now if Sabrina had done anything..." Robert raises an eyebrow, "Then what did you mean when you said that people use the song's name as the title for their trip there? It sounded really out of place..." "When people write stories about going to Viridian City, they name them after the song 'On the Road to Viridian City' from the 2BA Master CD... And it gets annoying, especially for the Archiver." Rilli chuckles, "What did you think I was talking about?" Robert shrugs, "I thought that Sabrina had switched your mind with a person living in an alternate dimension who sees our world through the television or computers, but that would just be... Archiver? What are you talking about, Rilli?!" Rilli blinks and giggles, "Oh, nevermind that... Let's kiss. It's been such a long time since we have. I felt a little weird about kissing myself when I was in your body, then I had plastic lips, but now we can finally kiss again!" Before Robert can say anything, Rilli presses her lips onto his and embraces him. That's when she feels something strange. She pushes away from Robert's face and looks under the sheets at her shorts, "Um, Robert, I think Sabrina *did* play a 'prank' on us..." "What's that?" Robert is curious and peeks under the sheets. He sees that Rilli has a protrusion on the front of her shorts and he screams! After noticing that there is none on his jeans, he screams ever louder... so loud, in fact, that he wakes himself up! * End Dream Sequence * "AHHHHH!!!" Robert sits up on the cold, dirty floor of the Viridian Gym, only to see dead bodies sprawled all over the floor on the other side of the bars he is behind, "AHHHHHH!!!" He starts to slap himself, to wake up from what he figures is still his dream, then remembers that it is his reality. In a worried panic, Robert runs his hands over his blue jeans, and is relieved to find everything where it should be, including his balls... Yes, that's right, Jack and Jill didn't steal his Pokeballs, after all. Robert hears footsteps coming from the stairwell across the room, and cowers in one of the corners of his jail cell. Giovanni steps into the room and his facial features twitch at the sight of so many dead Rockets, "Poor children. Doppler has no sense of honor." He walks across the hall to where Robert is cowering, careful not to step on any corpses along the way, "Hello, child. I was sitting with my Persian upstairs when I heard your screaming and remembered you were here. I'm am not here to hurt you, unlike Doppler, who would have if you had not done his bidding. What is your name?" "I'm Robert..." Robert replies, worried about what's going to happen, "How did you know that Doppler wanted me to...?" Giovanni cuts Robert off in mid-question, "I am the one asking the questions here, boy. Are you a member or have you ever associated with members of the organization known so unoriginally as Anti-Team Rocket? Tell me the truth, Robert." "No, sir, I haven't!" Robert shakes his head, "I didn't even know ATR existed until Sabrina somehow put this shirt on me and teleported me here..." Robert raises a white shirt that says "ATR RuleZ" off the floor, "Honest! I don't even like wearing white." "Well, it is after Labor Day, so I've been wearing crimson suits instead of my usual scarlet." Giovanni nods sagely, "You have to keep a sense of fashion when you're in my industry... I mean Gym Leading, of course. Now, on to business. To be sure that you are not an ATR, I will give you a simple oral examination. One, what is your catch phrase?" "Catch phrase?" Robert furrows his brow while thinking about it, "I think don't have one... Should I have one?" Giovanni shakes his head, "No. You just passed the first test. Two, if you were going to fight someone in a street brawl without Pokemon, and had to choose between two weapons, would you bring a sword or a pen that makes a clicking noise?" "Duh, that's an easy one, I'd bring the sword..." Robert chuckles over the question, but then becomes worried and says, "Wait, unless you're talking about that whole 'the pen is mightier than the sword' thing... then I'd have to think about it..." Giovanni smirks, "No, you answered correctly. Plus, you showed signs of thinking, so you must definitely not be an ATR. I will release you." The Viridian Gym Leader removes a key ring from a nearby wall and unlocks Robert's jail cell, "Now go home." Robert walks out of the jail. He heads towards the stairs leading up to the Gym's first floor, but he stops and remembers why he's in the Gym in the first place. Robert turns around and points at Giovanni, "I came here for an Earth Badge!" "I figured as much when I saw the seven Badges pinned on your shirt." Giovanni nods and says, "I accept your challenge, Robert. We will have a four on four Pokemon battle on the Arena upstairs for the Earth Badge. Follow me." He puts his hands behind his back and walks back upstairs, Robert behind him. He climbs up to the podium where he sits during Pokemon battles. His Persian is sprawled upon the throne there, the epitome of kitty laziness. Giovanni removes his Persian from the throne and sits down. The Persian leaps onto its master's lap, purrs, and Giovanni starts petting it, "Shall we begin?" Robert looks down at his belt, and remembers that he hasn't had a chance to heal his Pokemon since they fought in the Fighting Dojo, but he can't back down now, "Yes, sir!" Robert is shocked when he hears the voices of two big, burly guards behind him announce simultaneously, "You will use four Pokemon. No Time Limit. Let the battle begin!" Robert is confused for a moment, "Hey, how did they know that we were going to use four Pokemon each? Is every inch of this place under surveillance?" "Heh, how did you ever guess?" Giovanni grins and reaches into his vest. He removes a Pokeball from within, and the device snaps open while still in his hand. The beam that shoots out forms into a Dugtrio on the Arena floor! Robert chuckles when he sees the Dugtrio. The one he fought in the Diglett Cave was about ten times larger, and one he dreamed about once was even larger than that, so this one looks like a tiny wimp to him, "A strange prophetic dreams helped me win my Volcano Badge, so I'll follow my dream about the giant Dugtrio and play whack-a-mole. I choose Snorlax!" Robert grabs his golden Ultraball, pitches it over the Dugtrio, so that when Snorlax is released, she'll fall on top of it! "Snorlax, eh? Dugtrio, Dig!" Giovanni watches as his Dugtrio sinks into the ground before Snorlax's Pokeball pops open! When Snorlax finally does come crashing down, she doesn't hit Dugtrio. Instead, Dugtrio Digs out of the ground where she is and she falls to the side in pain from the attack. Giovanni smirks at Robert, "I saw that Snorlax battle strategy on a fighting video game one of my younger Rock...er, Gym Assistants was playing once. It seems like I have the upper hand, Robert..." Robert nods and shouts, "Yeah, it seems like it, but it's not true! Snorlax, Body Slam!" Snorlax struggles to stand up with all her might, and when she is finally standing, she just falls over again... on Dugtrio! The Body Slam causes the Dugtrio to sink into the floor. The three-headed creature pops up in another part of the Arena and shakes its three heads in pain, "Trio, Trio, Trio!" When Robert's Snorlax rolls to the side, the part of the Arena floor that she Body Slammed into is indented, "Snorrre..." "So, you want to ruin my Arena floor?" Giovanni frowns and shakes his head, "I won't give you the pleasure. Dugtrio, Fissure!" The Persian on Giovanni's lap recognizes the attack and hisses, covering its face with its paws, "Perrrsian!" Dugtrio sinks into the ground and starts popping in and out of the floor around Robert's Snorlax! Then Dugtrio pops up under Snorlax, splitting the ground below her apart! Snorlax falls into the crack, where she struggles to drag herself out of the hole... Since she's so fat, she can't escape Giovanni's Dugtrio as it K. O.'s her with Fissure! When Snorlax stops struggling and Dugtrio pops out of the ground a few meters away from her, Robert knows that his Pokemon has fainted. Robert pulls Snorlax's Ultraball off the floor and recalls her into it, "You just won because Snorlax was too heavy hop off the floor to escape Dugtrio. Let's see how well your Dugtrio can do against something that doesn't even touch the ground!" Robert grabs the first Pokeball on his belt and hurls it towards the huge hole in the Arena caused by Dugtrio's Fissure! "Haunter, go!" The purple ghost appears and its ghostly tail goes stiff. He looks for Rilli, but she's no where to be seen, "Haunt?" Giovanni laughs quietly, "Heh. You must have forgotten that Poison Pokemon are weak against Ground Pokemon." "I know that!" Robert shouts, remembering the Type Chart Lillian Eckert gave him, "But Haunter is a GHOST Pokemon, not a..." He then remembers what he learned on the first day of his Journey. Haunter is also a Poison type. Robert gulps, "Uh oh." "Dugtrio, Earthquake." Giovanni commands, and Dugtrio obeys. The entire Gym starts rumbling, and Robert hops around clumsily, trying to stay standing. Haunter, who is not affected by the Earthquake because he is floating, looks at Robert and laughs out loud, "HAW HAW HAW HAW..." The seismic waves emitting from Dugtrio are so strong that the dirt in the hole that Haunter is floating over gets knocked into the air! Haunter gets a mouthful of dirt and falls to the floor, "Haunt Haunt..." Now that Haunter is on the floor, the Earthquake's power is intensified, and the Ghost Pokemon faints, face forward! Once the Earthquake is over, Robert runs over towards Haunter and checks the one of the Ghost's disembodied wrists, "Oh no! He has no pulse! You monster, you killed..." He then recalls that Haunter has been dead since the day he met him, "Oh yeah." Robert pulls Haunter's Pokeball out of the dirt and pulls the Ghost Pokemon back into his portable home. Robert reaches for another Pokeball on his belt, "Alright, you asked for it. I'm going to use a Water Pokemon! Golduck, go!" Robert throws the Pokeball that was in the sixth slot on his belt and it pops open on the floor! The voluptuous female Golduck that emerges stretches her arms out and yawns. She takes a step forward without looking at the floor and falls in the hole created by Dugtrio's Fissure attack! She pulls her face out of the ground and spits dirt out of her beak, "Gold... uck..." "Golduck, Surf attack!" Robert shouts, pointing at the Dugtrio across the Arena. Golduck stands up in the dirt and and raises her arms high, "Golduck, Gold!" It starts drizzling inside the Gym. Dugtrio tries to show how tough it is by resisting the urge to go underground to avoid the rain. Golduck looks down at the ground she is standing in and notices it is becoming muddy. She makes a face of disgust and decides to climb out of the hole made by Dugtrio's Fissure. Since her webbed feet are covered in mud when she pulls herself out of the hole, she slides on the floor and crashes onto Dugtrio, "GoOoOooOLD-DUCK!" "Trio, Trio, Trio?" The Dugtrio's eyes have a look of concern on them when they see that it looks like Golduck is about to sneeze. Their worry is justified when Golduck finally does sneeze, sending out a geyser of water from her gray beak! Since the blast of water hits Dugtrio right on its faces, the three Diglett that make up the Dugtrio all faint after a few seconds of Golduck's Surf. When Golduck's killer sneeze is over, she opens her eyes, and blushes at the puddle on the floor, "Golduck..." Giovanni pulls Dugtrio back into its Pokeball and exchanges it for another one in his red vest, "Try your luck with this one." The Pokeball opens and the beam that shoots out forms into a fat, angry Nidoqueen. The female Pokemon snarls at Golduck for having a better figure than her, "Queeeeen! NIDO! NIDOQUEEN!" Giovanni smiles at his Pokemon's aggressiveness. Robert laughs at the sight of the Nidoqueen, remembering its Type, "You criticized me for sending out a Poison Pokemon against a Ground Pokemon and then you send out a Ground Pokemon against a Water Pokemon? This'll be too easy." Giovanni raises an eyebrow, "Oh, really? Nidoqueen, Thunder." Nidoqueen raises her arms and sparks start to fly about her massive body! One of the sparks flies to the roof of the Gym, charges up, and the Thunder makes a direct connection with Golduck, whose muddy feet are touching the wet floor! "GooOooOooOooLD!!!" Golduck falls over, and sparks continue to surge through her body even after the Thunder attack is over, ". . .duck." After muttering this, Golduck faints. Nidoqueen stomps up to Golduck and places her claws on her hips in a failed attempt to look sexy, "Nido. Nido... QUEEN!!!" Robert's jaw drops, still trying to figure out how a Ground Pokemon used a Thunder attack, "Uh... uh... Well, uhm, Golduck was my weaker Water Pokemon! There's no way Nidoqueen will beat..." Robert plucks a Pokeball off his belt and throws it, "Slowbro, my strong Water Pokemon who has just recently proven himself by defeating Sabrina's Alakazam!" When Slowbro appears, he is more hunched over than usual and panting up a storm. Robert slaps his forehead, "I haven't healed him since!" Slowbro groggily looks up at Nidoqueen and after a few seconds smiles at her, "Ahhh, Slow! Slowbro, slowbro..." Giovanni chuckles to himself, "This is your strongest Pokemon, Robert? I wouldn't want to see your weakest. Nidoqueen, let's not kill the poor creature with an electric attack. A Double Kick should suffice." Nidoqueen stomps up to Slowbro and scratches at the floor with her clawed feet, getting ready to Double Kick Slowbro right in his silly constantly-open jaw! Robert's heart starts pounding faster and he tries to think fast, "There has to be some way to..." Before Robert can finish saying this, Nidoqueen Kicks Slowbro in the face with one leg, then with the other, and Slowbro falls to the floor, fainted. Robert pulls at his hair, "...why can't real life be like the movies, where Slowbro would pull through and beat all three of the opponent's remaining Pokemon?!" Robert sighs and recalls Slowbro. He looks up at Giovanni, "I'll be back." Robert walks to the Viridian City Pokemon Center, frowning the whole way, thinking that he could have won if Rilli was there to offer help. -Robert