Group Name: The Brotherhood of Evil Pokémon
Author: Beth (bandraptor@yahoo.com)
Brotherhood of Evil Pokémon Manifesto version 1.5
as annotated by Sting (S) and Blizzard (B)
The Brotherhood of Evil Pokémon is a social organization for evil
Pokémon of all Types! It was founded by Blizzard the Persian and Sting
the Tentacool in the year 2002, when said founders realized that the
formation of such a group would qualify them for a tax-exempt status.
The Brotherhood is always accepting new members. In order to join, you
must either be an evil Pokémon, be a regular Pokémon and/or human who
supports evil Pokémon, or pay a one-time fee of $15 [1500 Pokébucks
--S]. Benefits include a personalized, self-adhesive nametag, and a
solemn promise from Blizzard that she will not try to eat you (or your
Pokémon, should you happen to be human) for the duration of your
membership. [Such contracts are unwritten, and shall be immediately
rescinded should Brotherhood membership ever be terminated. --B] The
Brotherhood meets the third Sunday of every month for pizza, and
occasionally plots to take over the world.
Current members:
Blizzard the Persian
Blizzard is a large, [beautiful --B] white Persian, with [beautiful
--B] sea blue eyes, and a [beautiful --B] sapphire on her forehead.
She was born in the Seafoam Caves of Southern Kanto, where she lived
until the day when she was inadvertently teleported to Viridian City
by a Team Rocket experiment. There, she joined up with a group called
the "Pokémon Pack," which consisted of her[illustrious --B]self, a
jumbo Raichu named Samuraichu, 2 Eevees, a Clefairy, a Dragonite, and
a lone human who had the ability to understand Pokéspeak. When the
group dispersed, Blizzard decided she'd take a trip to Johto, and took
a job with famed Director Stevon Schpielbunk, in order to pay for the
trip. After a few months of work as an electrician on his set, she'd
earned the money that she needed, and as a side benefit, had learned
to control her previously unpredictable THUNDERBOLT technique.
Blizzard also knows the moves SLASH and PAYDAY, which she learned
through level-up, and SWAGGER, which was given to her as a gift-TM by
the Johto Division of Tourism, upon her arrival in the country. She
can bite for the purposes of eating and killing food, but she doesn't
know the Dark-type attack that's commonly used in battles.
Blizzard is a very classy cat. [Why, thank you, Sting! --B] She's well
mannered, well groomed, and extremely well spoken--to the point where
she can usually trick people into thinking she's much more
sophisticated than she actually is. [And thank you agai--hey, wait a
second... --B] Blizzard is quite vain, paying enormous amounts of
attention to her outward appearance, both physical and otherwise. She
is extremely concerned about the opinion held by humans that trained
Pokémon are stronger than wild ones like herself, and thinks it is the
responsibility of the Brotherhood to dispel such fallacies. Her other
major goal in life is to eat virtually every Pokémon she comes across.
She likes Jigglypuffs, hates Gym Leaders, and is really, really bad
with names.
Sting the Tentacool
Sting also hails from the Seafoam Islands. While swimming around near
the beach one day, he was captured by an astonishingly stupid
Slowpoke, who nicknamed him "Dr. Octopus" [Ha ha ha --B] [I thought I
told you to leave that out of the manifesto! --S], and dragged him all
over the Indigo League. When both Sting and the Slowpoke were captured
by a Pokémaniac, Sting had an opportunity to escape, which he readily
accepted. Unfortunately, he had no way of getting back to Seafoam,
since, while he knew ACID, SUPERSONIC, CURSE, and POISON STING, he
couldn't use Surf, and there wasn't any water around for him to Surf
in, anyway. He happened to meet up with Blizzard as she was leaving
Kanto, and lacking anything else to do, he went with her to Johto.
Sting is the opposite of Blizzard in every way. He's much more
insightful than she is, but he's also ill-tempered, and tends to curse
unintelligibly every time he opens his mouth, so no one ever really
listens to him. Which is too bad, because he's usually the only one in
the group who knows what the cool he's talking about. Unbeknownst to
most, Sting has a beautiful singing voice.
Avalanche the Tyranitar
Avalanche is your average dumb as a rock, thick as a brick, ugly as
sin Tyranitar. Hahaha, he doesn't know how to read, so we can write
anything we want about him! Avalanche beats people up for us, so don't
cross us, or we'll have him STOMP you. Or CRUNCH you. Or FLAMETHROWER
and ROCK SLIDE you. The whole nine yards.
Other information:
Anyone who allies him or herself with the Brotherhood is considered an
ally of the Brotherhood! Anyone who pisses them off is considered an
enemy. The following persons have been permanently barred from
joining:
Luthor
Hazey [She means Misty --S]
Wonka [That would be Brock --S]
Pokémaniacs of all kinds
Luthor
Thor [Lieutenant Surge... --S]
Thor's Electabuzz [""--S]
Luthor
Shorts Boys
Eevees [They're too delicious for me to give up --B]
Articuno
Luthor [We GET it, Sting. --B]
Any and all Gym Leaders!!!!
The Brotherhood's objectives are to elevate the status of wild Pokémon
to that of their trained brethren, conquer the world, and make life
miserable for stupid trainers who don't submit to our will! Also to
collect donations, which should be sent to The Brotherhood of Evil
Pokémon C/O that one Blastoise, 149 E. 35th Route, Goldenrod City,
Johto; or e-mailed to CSH4EVILPKMN@yahoo.com
Signed,
Blizzard & Sting